I have 2 strange questions on this week's parsha (Vayeishev)

amother

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 6:55 pm

Sorry for posting this anonymously but I feel weird posting this question under my real Imamother name, so I'm posting it anonymously.

I guess I've become jaded since I'm on imamother, but I was wondering when hearing the story of Yosef and Mrs. Potiphar and I was wondering to myself, what would've been the big deal if Yosef would've just gone along and slept with her? He was single, she isnt Jewish so she's not halachically married - is there some kind of grave punishment for having relations with a non Jewish woman or something? I mean it was a huge thing of him to run away from her, but I was just wondering after hearing all these stories of supposedly frum Jews having premarital relations, what would've happened, had Yosef given in.

My second question is, why did the brothers never tell their father Yaakov for 22 years that Yosef was in fact alive and had not been eaten by a wild animal? how could they keep up the charade for such a long time? If it'd have been me I'd have caved very soon...

Thanks for any answers!

amother

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 6:57 pm

regarding question one, I guess it is a big deal after all.

chatz

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 7:41 pm

Re #1: She was married and gilui arayos is part of the 7 mitzvos b'nei noach. If she was single, I guess it would have been a whole different story.

#2- good question.. we're a weak willed generation Wink

. I can't keep a secret for a day, let alone 22 years! They did make a shvuah (or something) between themselves not to tell.

amother

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 7:51 pm

Thank you Chatz that was very helpful. I'd forgotten about their shvuah. and youre right about adultery being part of the noahide mitzvos. thanks.

chatz

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 8:46 pm

always glad to help! If you have questions, ask! On a site like this someone should know.

Plus, it's always good to prove to myself that wifehood and motherhood hasn't completely addled my brain Very Happy

anonymom

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 9:57 pm

Regarding the first ?, aside from her being married, Yosef was the son of Yakov Avinu. He was Yosef Hatzadik. Being the kind of woman she was, she certainly would have dragged him down to all kinds of tumah.

yihyetov

Tue, Dec 08 2009, 10:01 pm

answer #2: I think the meam loez sais that that had each other in an oath not to tell, and reuven did this b/c he was already in trouble from the other "stuff" he did so as the oldest he held them to an oath not to tell b/c he couldve been disowned by yaakov had he found out. and telling could have caused yaakov a heart attack out of the shock....read the meam loez...its awesome!!!

momsprince

Wed, Dec 09 2009, 12:18 am

anonymom wrote:

If I recall correctly Yosef is called Yosef Hatzadik because of this story.

Mama Bear

Wed, Dec 09 2009, 4:47 pm

I also have a question on the parsha. Why did Yosef never try to return back home from Mitzrayim? If his brothers were able to find their way from EY to Mitzrayim why couldnt he do it at some point?

amother

Wed, Dec 09 2009, 5:16 pm

Mama Bear wrote:

I also have a question on the parsha. Why did Yosef never try to return back home from Mitzrayim? If his brothers were able to find their way from EY to Mitzrayim why couldnt he do it at some point?

Here's something I wrote on the topic. From chabad.org

Quote:

Why didn't Joseph notify Jacob that he was still alive?

This question has troubled many of the biblical commentaries. How could Joseph have allowed his father to mourn him for so long? Why didn't he let Jacob know that he was alive? Egypt is not so far from Canaan, and it was certainly within Joseph's means to dispatch a courier to his father with the good news that he was alive and well.

Here are a few of the answers that are given:

Nachmanides explains (in his commentary on Genesis 42:9) that Joseph understood that his dreams (detailed in Genesis 37) were actual prophecies and would be fulfilled in their entirety. In Joseph's first dream, his eleven brothers were bowing down to him. In the second, his father was included too. Joseph concluded that the first dream must be realized in its entirety before the second one would be fulfilled. Had he sent a message to Jacob, he certainly would have come to see him immediately—and the second dream would have come true before the first. He therefore waited until after all eleven of his brothers – including Benjamin – had come to him, in fulfillment of the first dream, before revealing his identity to his brothers and instructing them to bring Jacob down to Egypt.1

Iturei Torah (a collection of Torah thoughts by Rabbi Aharon Yaakov Greenberg) cites a suggestion that Joseph was concerned that G‑d would punish his brothers for selling him. He therefore wanted to ensure that they repented. The optimal level of repentance is when the transgressor finds himself in the same situation as when he was tempted to sin in the first place, and this time chooses not to sin. The brothers sold Joseph into slavery out of jealousy. Joseph gave his brothers gifts, and he gave Benjamin a bigger gift (ibid. 43:34) to arouse their jealousy. He arranged for Benjamin to be framed as a thief so that he could claim Benjamin as his slave. When the brothers fought for Benjamin's release, without the slightest hint of envy, Joseph saw that their repentance was complete. He immediately revealed himself and told the brothers to let Jacob know that he was still alive. Had Joseph let his father know earlier that he was still alive, his brothers would never have had the opportunity to demonstrate complete repentance.

The Lubavitcher Rebbe answers this question (Likutei Sichot vol. 10 p. 129ff) based on Rashi's assertion (in his commentary on Gen. 37:33) that Isaac, Jacob's father, prophetically knew that Joseph was alive—but didn't tell Jacob. "How can I tell him," Isaac reasoned, "when G‑d chooses to keep it a secret from him?" Joseph simply followed the same logic. He knew that G‑d had sent him to Egypt for a reason, and that G‑d didn't want Jacob to know where he was. Joseph, therefore, refrained from sending a message to his father—though the knowledge that his father was mourning his supposed demise must have certainly pained him immensely.

FOOTNOTES
1.

Based on this interpretation, Nachmanides explains the verse (Genesis 41:9): "And Joseph remembered the dreams that he had dreamed about them, and he said to them, 'You are spies...'" Because Joseph remembered the dreams, and because he saw that the first one had yet to be completely fulfilled – because Benjamin was not present – therefore he devised an elaborate scheme, which included accusing his brothers of espionage, in order to orchestrate that Benjamin, too, should come down to Egypt.

PinkFridge

Wed, Dec 09 2009, 7:28 pm

Mama Bear, I heard that when Binyamin came he recognized Yosef but - this was his trait - he knew the time wasn't right. Seems really strange to us but then again, my ruach hakodesh has been down for a while (like all my life) so I assume there's more to it than I can understand.

And to the OP, the problem with #1 is that had he done it, he wouldn't have retained the great moral purity he was destined to hand down to his descendants.