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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Teenagers and Older children
Can anyone give me info on manhattan high school for girls??
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amother


 

Post Fri, Dec 11 2009, 2:52 am
I'm looking into Manhattan High for our dd -can anyone comment on the values of the student population? The hanhala is obviously a frum/yeshivish/intellectual sort of interesting mix...however we're afraid that practically our daughter might be surrounded by girls with more modern and materialistic values. Would hate to spend all that money on trying to provide a frum environment with depth only to have our dd come out with designer sweat shirts...should we be looking into Beis Yakov D'Rav Meir?? Seems like a Lakewood cookie cutter environment with lots of tests and not much thinking...HELP!!
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bubby




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 11 2009, 3:35 am
Some of my former JH students went there. While it's true they were from affluent homes (remember, the fees are high) I wouldn't say they were any more materialistic than anyone else who went to other HS. They concentrated on their studies...it's a very hard schedule.
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amother


 

Post Fri, Dec 11 2009, 7:04 am
I went to MHS. I graduated 2007. There are a lot of wealthy girls who wear very expensive clothing, but I wouldn't say it's a big focus. Like Bubby said, I don't think girls are any more materialistic there than any other school. Actually, maybe less, because they aren't wannabes like girls in other schools, they take the fact that they can afford these clothes as a given and no one really thinks much about it or cares that much. That said, not everyone is wealthy. There is a mix.
There is a LOT of work, its pretty high pressure. If your daughter isn't either very naturally smart or very studious, it's not the school for her. Also, if she buckles under pressure it can be very difficult. The education is very good. You learn a lot, and take lots of AP classes.
It's also really great to be in Manhattan, I loved that. You go on cool trips, and when you're a senior you can go out during breaks. We used to go to central park for lunch- its like 5 minutes away!
BTW, my grade was a more yeshivish one, a lot of Monsey and Brooklyn girls, but I've heard that in the past few years its become more modern- more Five Towns type. You'd have to check that out, I'm not sure.
As for the admin...Reb. Assaf is a very powerful figure. If you stay on her good side, she'll like you, but many girls were terrified of her. She basically runs things. There are some good teachers, and some not so great ones just like any other school. I'd say the secular studies ones are probably better (some are not Jewish or not frum) but isn't it always like that?
Hope I helped. Let me know if you have any more questions.
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amother


 

Post Fri, Dec 11 2009, 7:29 am
OP, I went to Prospect,but my parents very seriously considered sending me to MHS, because I am the "intellectual type" who loves a challenge and asks alot of questions about the world around me; they wanted a more open-minded enviroment for me where I would feel comfortable.

The reasons they decided not to send me to MHS, had nothing to do with money or the fear of materialistic values.
they were:
a) the fact that it is/was a long commute for a 13-14 year old
b) most, if not all of my friends, went to elementary school with me (I did not go to camp, so didnt have a set of "camp friends"), and it would have entailed making totally new friends (and being that I am not the most sociable person in the world and sometimes tend to keep to myself, that might have been very challenging for me in a new HS environment), and
c) although Prospect park as a whole doesn't have the same "name value" as Manhattan High School (ie, to colleges and seminaries), if you are an intelligent, intellectual, hard worker, you wont be at a disadvantage. I ended up going to BJJ, and after that, to college and graduate school. (just go give you an idea of the fact that PPY does not put you at a huge disadvantage: I applied to Columbia for undergrad - really just to see if I could "get in," and I was accepted)

Now, back to Manhattan High School for a second. Now that I gave you the personal reasons why I myself didnt go, I want to clear something up:

you are concerned about the following:
OP wrote:

Would hate to spend all that money on trying to provide a frum environment with depth only to have our dd come out with designer sweat shirts

and someone else replied with:
another amother wrote:
Actually, maybe less, because they aren't wannabes like girls in other schools, they take the fact that they can afford these clothes as a given and no one really thinks much about it or cares that much.


I emphatically agree. and with regard to D'rav Meir in particular - you will find TONS of "nuveau riche" types and chanel-wearing wannabes there. Let me paint you a picture. At MHS, there might be girls from very wealthy families, who walk around in Tods Shoes ($450) and Gucci sweaters ($1000+) which they purchased with their mothers without even thinking for a second about those prices being the least bit expensive. They dont flaunt it though -because to them, it is not something to "flaunt," it is just their way of life. It is not "in your face," and everyone is not trying to outdo their neighbor. The Drav Meir student population however, is far more "showy" about it- to an extreme. they instead, will be walking around in their Coach Shoes ($200) and Juicy Sweaters ($250), getting their little manicures on Ave M. Get the picture?

And if I were comparing two schools, I would be comparing MHS to PROSPECT(!), not D'rav Meir, which is VERY lakewoody and yeshivish. meaning, if you are looking for an "academic environment" in which you memorize every rashi and Hadar and BJJ are pushed and becoming a CPA (or other professional) to support your lifetime-in-kollel husband is considered the ideal, then yes, you've found the right place. But they dont "push" college, and the JAPpiness is much more pervasive there than MHS.

If you want "real intellectual," I think Manhattan is probably the way to go. More "modern" values- yes, being that the parents can afford the $$$tuition bill, they obviously are working professionals (many doctors, lawyers, etc), and so the hashkafos might be a little to the "left" of "yeshivish brooklyn." but if you are even considering MHS, I think BY Drav Meir is much too far to the Right hashkafah wise, and, like I said, you will find the girls to be much more materialistic there.

hope my analysis helps.
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amother


 

Post Mon, Dec 14 2009, 1:22 am
Thanks for everyone's input. We've obviously been asking around of ppl that have sent to Manhattan. We're still a little leery...maybe the whole hs thing is scary altogether particularly b/c this is our first daughter. She really is a genuinely bright, talented and questioning individual and we so want to put her into the right environment where she won't feel stifled but on the other hand we want her to be machshiv Torah and learning. We want her to see learning as the center of her world, not the secular world...do Manhattan girls marry learning boys?? Are they machshiv learning? Is intellectual openess seen as being incorporated into a Torah centered life or are they seen as merely somewhat co-existing...I feel like if I send her to Manhattan I might open up a pandora's box intellectually for her and ch"v she may not go in the direction we would like her to go and on the other hand a BY Drav Meir school with all of its inherent Lakewood closed mindedness might turn her off as well...I know I'm probably taking this waayyyy tooo seriouslY (!) and sound oh so much like a first-timer at this -which I am- but this whole ordeal is sooo nerve wracking!
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amother


 

Post Mon, Dec 14 2009, 7:23 am
amother wrote:
We want her to see learning as the center of her world, not the secular world...do Manhattan girls marry learning boys??

yes. I have friends from MHS who married boys from Yeshivos across the spectrum. Some learned "short term," some are still in Kollel. I think alot of this depends on the home. If the parents are enthusiastic and are machshiv torah, then what the hanhalah emphasizes about it, sticks with the girl. if the parents really scoff at the idea, well, then those girls might go the other way. but it is that way in any school. I think you will find that the girls and the parents at MHS are more "real" than Drav Meir. no Flatbush games, IYKWIM.
amother wrote:

Are they machshiv learning?

Again, I went to Prospect, but from my friends who went there, absolutely they are.

amother wrote:

Is intellectual openess seen as being incorporated into a Torah centered life or are they seen as merely somewhat co-existing...

In other words, do they see them to co-exist along the lines with the Torah Umadah hashkafah - I think that is your question, right? and the answer is an emphatic no.
Having a stellar general studies department doesnt mean they think the two are equal. it means they want to provide their girls with the best tools and skills possible to make it and be successful in today's world, while living a Torah rich lifestyle.


amother wrote:

I feel like if I send her to Manhattan I might open up a pandora's box intellectually for her and ch"v she may not go in the direction we would like her to go and on the other hand a BY Drav Meir school with all of its inherent Lakewood closed mindedness might turn her off as well...

if your daughter is a real intellectual, I think Drav Meir is not the right place for her at all. she will quickly see through the facade and will be left quite disenchanted. They are way too closed minided for what you are describing. and academically, I dont think lots of memorization = challenging. In college and sem (and in high school), often the easiest classes for me were the ones that required tons of rote memorization. those were the ones I was able to "knock off" studying for while doing something else like eating, talking on the phone, etc. memorizing doesnt require thinking skills. I dont think she will get what she is looking for at a school like Drav Meir.
amother wrote:

I know I'm probably taking this waayyyy tooo seriouslY (!) and sound oh so much like a first-timer at this -which I am- but this whole ordeal is sooo nerve wracking!

nah, this is your oldest, this is what parents do. I dont have HS age daughters, but I am/was the same way about every first - which playgroup, which preschool, which elementary school, etc. it may seem "dumb" to someone 10 years older and wiser, but they were the same way 10 yrs ago!
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ruth




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Jan 07 2010, 4:23 am
my dd wants to go to MHS. she has also wanted to go to Bruria. She craves a highly intellectual enviroment but I don't want to expose her to things that might exagerate this tendancy. How does MHS round out the education of the girls so that they develop their middot, and emunah. One problem I find with schools that emphacize academics is that many of the students come out jaded.

my dd is very motivated and wants to go to college. I don't overtly discourage her, but I do want her to good Torah based outlook. I am more concerned about her being exposed to secular philosophy than issues regarding boys (because I think she is getting good chinuch about this.)

btw, there were so many amother's, but I was confused which school you were referring to in this quote:
Quote:
... meaning, if you are looking for an "academic environment" in which you memorize every rashi and Hadar and BJJ are pushed and becoming a CPA (or other professional) to support your lifetime-in-kollel husband is considered the ideal, then yes, you've found the right place. But they dont "push" college, and the JAPpiness is much more pervasive there than MHS.


if any of the posters could pm, I would like to continue this conversation via PM's

btw, do any of these schools offer academic/merit scholarships for poor families?
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amother


 

Post Sun, Jan 31 2010, 2:16 pm
amother wrote:
I went to MHS. I graduated 2007.

Guess what? You have a classmate on Imamother!
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amother


 

Post Sun, Jan 31 2010, 2:23 pm
I taught there for a few years, and was there when you were there 2007 amothers Smile
let me know if you have any questions....
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fmt4




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 31 2010, 3:00 pm
amother wrote:
amother wrote:
I went to MHS. I graduated 2007.

Guess what? You have a classmate on Imamother!


Fun! PM me!
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Tzippora




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 31 2010, 3:50 pm
Can weigh in on the school, if needed - I graduated 2003. Hi everyone!
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ruth




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 01 2010, 3:43 am
amother wrote:
I taught there for a few years, and was there when you were there 2007 amothers Smile
let me know if you have any questions....

would you mind contacting me in a PM since I don't know your screen name?
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amother


 

Post Sun, Feb 07 2010, 8:42 pm
Does anyone know if there is transportation available to manhattan HS for girls from northern new jersey? Also, what are the hours for the school? Thank you.
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morahaviva




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 08 2010, 3:27 pm
I know that there is transportation from Passaic and from Teaneck - not sure where else in northern NJ.
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amother


 

Post Thu, Feb 11 2010, 8:58 pm
My sister is there now. She loves the school. That being said she is extremely bright and is able to handle the pressure. That should be your biggest concern sending to Manhattan. If your child is not the top of her class and willing to put in work she will not do well there. Manhattan is also very different in another respect - it has a mix of students there are five from this neighborhood, seven from there and ten from there. No one comes into school knowing everyone and it is almost like a fresh start for every girl. I find it a plus that there are girls from different homes and environments, but some more close minded types don't like to expose their children to anything other than lifestyles that are like their own. In terms of affluence, te tutition is over 20,000 a year so yes you have the most affluent from Flatbush, Lawrence,Riverdale and Manhattan, but you also have girls from Queens, Monsey and Philadelphia, and communities in New Jersey. For your question of how the girls are after high school, look into the seminaries they end up at. You will see a mix, but the common thread is the intelligence factor(BJJ, Michlala, Bnos Chava).
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mimimom




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Feb 12 2010, 1:09 pm
Be very careful here. The hanhalah tends to be very heavy-handed, ie. if you want to transfer you daughter out a school they don't like, or want to send her to a seminary that doesn't strike their fancy, they won't give you a transcript. I don't want to get into lashon hara, but suffice it to say it they really damaged my relationship with my daughter. This seems especially the case with single mothers (there were several girls in my daughter's year and I know a couple of other mothers had problems.) My daughter did quite well there, and got a good education--but I wouldn't send her there if I had a second chance.
To address your question, btw, there was a lot of pressure on the "poorer" girls. It was tough, and I don't think the school did enough to address it; it was clear that wealth conveyed status (although that seems to be the case to often in frum circles in general, le-tza'areinu)
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amother


 

Post Fri, Jun 27 2014, 2:41 am
How is MHS these days ? Anything changed since 2010?
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amother


 

Post Fri, Jun 27 2014, 12:29 pm
A lot changed, but it's more or less the same.

I worked there within the past few years.
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amother


 

Post Fri, Jun 27 2014, 12:47 pm
Who's the principle there now?
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amother


 

Post Fri, Jun 27 2014, 1:03 pm
As a mom of a few MHS girls (one there now) I can say it gets only better and better and better each year. It is unbelievable. The warmth, the love of Torah, the way the girls are treated as adults and not babies, the level of education, the ability to form close connections to faculty and administration - I can just go on and on and on.
Yes, some of my daughter's friends are very wealthy. Israel every year, etc. etc. etc. Some come from homes with 8 kids and the father is in chinuch. My dh and I could never tell which girl came from what type of financial home. They respect each other, go to each other's homes, don't really flaunt the money. It's just something they have - but they are classy wealthy. my daughters had far more pressure to wear the right shoes and right clothes and right handbags in their local BY elementary where over 50 percent is on scholarship than in MHS. They and their friends are big Forever 21, Target shoppers.
As for Ms. Friedman, and Mrs. Yanofsky - they are unreal. They know each and every girl - it's evident at graduation when they don't just hand out diplomas but say a few things about each girl. My daughters woke up excited to go to school every morning - even though they had a commute and could have slept later had they gone to a local BY. When they graduated they actually cried that high school was over.

Some girls go to Stern, some to Touro, some marry Lakewood boys, some YU boys. MHS is not pegged into a corner regarding haskafa. It is yiddishkeit that is beautiful, valued, and needs to respected and every girl is valued. There is definitely a push to marry a learning boy, but many girls marry learner earners. It isn't close minded - so if you don't want your daughter in a narrow mindset don't send. The girls come from many communities and so they learn to develop a respect and appreciation of lots of facets of Klal Yisrael.
In terms of education - there is no comparison out there. Just look at their course offerings, their teachers.... We never once questioned a penny of our tuition bill. Often in our cheaper elementary schools and mesivtas we wonder what exactly we are getting for our money.

Good luck!
anon to protect my screen
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