What do you think of Amen Seudas/Seudat Amen?

chanchy123

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 7:52 am

My community is having one and I feel very uneasy about this. I would love to participate to be with the other women, but I find a hard time swollowing the whole concept. I don't want to be offensive but it seems very avoda zarish to me.
I would love to hear any insight you may have on this subject (sources preferred). I am really hoping for you guys to convince me this is a great thing but am willing to hear all oppinions, bear in mind I come from a long line of litvaks.

shalhevet

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 8:18 am

Does anyone have a source, or even a chashuva contemporary rav who said to do it? Because, so far, although of course there are many, many sources on the chashivus of answering amen, I have never heard of a source for the amen parties.

shalhevet

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 8:24 am

Ah, Raisin, you don't keep up with the latest crazes? I have to admit not having been to one, but my dds have. They give out something of each bracha, and each person in turn makes the bracha and everyone else answers amen.

There is a very great zechut in answering amen, but I'm not sure creating artificial settings for brachas is the idea.

kalsee

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 8:25 am

I don't see why it's something you need a source for.

A group of people (usually girls/ladies) get together. everyone gets food from each brocha -cracker, grape juice, piece of apple, cucumber, and candy (just examples).
Then they go around and every person makes a brocha on each food with everyone answering amen with kavana each time.
This is usually done as a zchus for someone.

cinnamon

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 8:30 am

An amen party is where a bunch of ladies get together and each one eats something of a different bracha and everyone answers amen.

I don't know any source for having them but I don't see anything wrong with them either. Its a nice way to get together and to emphasize the chashivut of answering amen.

I am not really sure what my position is on all the "mitzva trends" out there (seudat amen, shirat habria, L'H mishmars etc.) on the one hand they are ways to get closer to Hashem and there is really nothing wrong with them on the other hand I feel they kinda take the focus away of really working on oneself. It makes it easier to say something like "this is not my L"H hour so there is no problem in me listening to this juicy tidbit"
kwim?

skcomputer

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 8:42 am

My sister-in-law's community held a joint seudat Amen for her and another woman who was also ill. My sister-in-law thought it was a loving way for the community to express its concern for her and even though she was very tired from her chemo, she went and had a really nice time. She's now in remission from her cancer. Did the seudat Amen help? Who knows, but it is definitely something for which she will have a very fond memory.

Tablepoetry

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 9:13 am

I have been to not one, but many. It's the latest greatest idea for mother-daughter evenings at certain mamlachti dati schools.
Borrring....so borringg....think 50 women saying brachot. They usually cut down and don't have everyone say everything, or it takes forever. Even so, it takes forever. There was no social interaction in our amen parties. Just lots of amenim.

That said, if it helps any of the people it was meant for (a sick child in one case), I'll go every night.

Isramom8

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 9:29 am

Ours were more sociable. It may depend on how well the crowd knows each other.
My dd in seminary (she comes hiome every 2 weeks) makes every day like an amen party - you have to stop what you are doing and answer her loud, intense brachos. LOL

Last edited by Isramom8 on Mon, Oct 18 2010, 9:43 am; edited 1 time in total

realeez

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 9:39 am

Tablepoetry wrote:

Maybe it helps that it's the only type of "party" when no one is able to speak LH for a length of time!

Starhavah

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 12:17 pm

DH thinks that they are making unnecessary brachot (bracha livatalah?). Anyway, I do not go because I think that it encourages women to feel they have an excuse for not doing real davening. Too many of the women who make time for this do not make time to daven in the same way. I am very opposed to the way that many women go out of their way to get hubby to minyan but never think to daven themselves.

kolshemesh

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 12:52 pm

Starhavah wrote:

Isn't wearing a Talit katan "unnecessary"? Men go out of their way to wear a 4 cornered garment to be able to fulfill a mitzva. I thought a brocha in vain was when you aren't able to create the conditions for the brocha at all.

the world's best mom

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 12:55 pm

I've been to 2 Brachos parties, arranged by R' Moshe Meir Weiss's family. They were extremely meaningful. I enjoyed them very much and would love to go to another one.

The nicest part is that you learn that each Bracha is a Segula for something else. For example, Mezonos is for Mazon- parnassa, Boray P'ree HaGafen is for a Shidduch (Invei HaGefen...), HaEitz is for having kids. Rebetzin Weiss would preface each Bracha with what we should have Kavana for and she would announce the names of who she had in mind. Before each person said their Bracha, we had a chance to say what they will have in mind as they say the Bracha. They brought Besamim to each one so that we could say that Bracha too, because it's a Segula to have Nachas MiBanim.

mamaleh

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 1:06 pm

Why would it be a bracha she'aina tzricha? they are eating the food so they need to make a brocha. I never heard that there is a problem with eating just to be able to make a brocha. My dh does it all the time on Shabbos to be able to get to meah brachos.
Starhavah- can you explain why your husband thinks it's a problem, please.
I've been to a couple- one at a Shabbos Kallah- it was more informal- they had everything available and asked everyone to make their brochos out loud. The other we made as a prize for the 4-6 yr old group in an after- school daycare. We had been working on making brochos and saying Amen and we had an 'amen chart' for the amens said to our brachos (at snack time) when we got to 1000 amens we had a brachos party (we got ices for shehakol to make it even more exciting). We set the table with fancy paper goods and invited the 3yr olds to join us (they had helped with some of the amens). The kids had a great time.

grace413

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 2:03 pm

mamaleh wrote:

What's the difference between a Tzadik and a regular person?

The regular person makes a bracha to eat and the Tzadik eats to make a bracha.
(Not my original thought but I don't remember where I heard it)

Starhavah

Mon, Oct 18 2010, 2:37 pm

mamaleh wrote:

I remember learning one should not make a different bracha over each course of a meal and instead eat bread and make motzei so that everything is covered. But it has been so long since I learned it I can remember where I got it from.

mamaleh wrote:

Starhavah- can you explain why your husband thinks it's a problem, please.

I will try to remember to ask tonight. I get home late since I work 2 jobs on Mondays so if I forget remind me tomorrow. :-)

Star Havah