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Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children
Best tips for getting kids to pick up after themselves?



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fortunate123




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 18 2011, 10:39 am
Looking for some fresh new ideas to get kids motivated to pick up after themselves. The chart thing has never worked for me - maybe I am not doing it right? I can't be everywhere all the time and know who did or didn't do what all the time either. I have four girls ages 2 to 8 and they LOVE blaming the mess on the toddler, though I constantly see the 5 yr old, 6 yr old and 8 yr old leaving things lying around all over the house. I really don't like the nudging and constant reminders....please share anything that worked well for you!
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acccdac




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 18 2011, 11:09 am
in our house you clean up, it doesnt make a difference who made the mess.

whenever we get the excuse about but "I didnt make the mess" we remind them that they are part of a family. I cook for everyone not just myself, etc.

If there is something that we know will turn into a big mess, and there is only 1 child doing it we warn them from the start that they will have to clean it by themselves (although we do encourage the siblings to help out as a nice gesture). Obviously punishment is given if they dont follow through.

Another way of getting them to clean up is 1) putting on a timer and telling them that as long as they actually spend the time cleaning I will let them stop when the timer rings. I also allow them to choose the amount of time 10, 15 or 20 minutes. You'd be surprised how many times they've chosen the larger amount. 2) telling each of them to pick up 10 pieces and put them away. If that still leaves a mess I tell them "now pick up 8 pieces", etc. They see it as a game.
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ora_43




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 18 2011, 11:13 am
My kids are a bit younger. My approach - first I tell them to pick things up, then I tell them again, then if they're still not doing it I tell them that I'm going to pick up the toys and put the toys in my room. So far that last one works every time, and I haven't had to actually do it (I would).
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Hashem_Yaazor




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 18 2011, 11:26 am
Things I've done depending on situation:

Toys don't get cleaned up, they get put away in storage.

Motivate kids to clean up living room floor so I can take out a special game that needs floor space (we have Hullabaloo, Twister would also work well) -- this is a game that they don't have general access to and it's a fun treat as a natural reward for a clean floor.

Special time: Thursday night -- let's clean up the living room for Shabbos as a surprise for Abba to see when he comes home. This is sometimes accompanied by a treat like an ice pop if we finish quickly and we're waiting outside in the hot weather.

Let kids choose what category of things they'll clean up. My 2.5 year old might do the puzzles, one son all the books, another son the cars...and keep on working through the categories. It breaks down the task significantly.

We do the timer or the number of item thing too, sometimes combined. Can you do 10 things before the timer goes off?

(That being said, please don't take a look at my living room. I'm counting down the days till we move and won't have toys stored there Smile)
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flowerpower




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 18 2011, 11:58 am
1-I have certain things they must do no matter what and very consistant with it. If they don't do it I call them from where they are and make sure they do it-every day. Some examples are putting clothes IN the hamper, shoes in their room, plate and cup in the g-can.....

2- I let them chose one thing they should clean up per kid so they only have one thing to do when there are a few toys/games out.

3-if there is a motivation coming I use that as a reward when the room is clean they get it.
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fortunate123




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 18 2011, 11:23 pm
Thanks for posting ideas...please keep them coming! I am really eager for ideas that help with day-to-day clutter, not cleanup after playtime. Stuff like: art projects and papers brought home from school, hair accessories, shoes, little prizes and knick knacks they come home with, etc. Thanks!
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acccdac




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, May 19 2011, 9:26 am
you need to make a place for everything.

for nicknacks each of my kids has a little box. whatever can fit inside stays inside (or I tell them I will trash it) and if it doesnt fit they cant keep it.

they have a drawer where school projects are kept.

They each know where their clothes belong and I only fold the laundry and they are responsible for putting it way themselves.

For dirty laundry it's just matter of constantly repeating yourself till they get the picture, something like oh I'm sorry I cant hear what you said because I am busy looking at your pjs on the floor.
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marina




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, May 19 2011, 9:42 am
I give them a number of things to pick up - 25 or whatever. They know that when they clean up that number, they are done, so they don't bother arguing about it.
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Hashem_Yaazor




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, May 19 2011, 9:55 am
Re: cleaning up their clothes/PJs, it's as simple as they have not finished changing until they've done that. Dirty clothes in hamper, pajamas on bed, tzitzis hung up, etc.

What does this mean? At nights, they have to change before my husband comes home (close to 7 -- my kids are young enough for this to work). They can't wait for him until they've changed (outside or in hall of building, depending on weather). If they aren't changed when he comes home, they might not have time for bedtime story. So their clothes have to be all cleaned up. (On M"S, they get dessert for SS when they've changed; on Friday night, depending on season, it's no dessert/early Shabbos meal/whatever is appropriate,.)
In the mornings, no breakfast until they've gotten dressed. And part of getting dressed means putting PJs on bed or in hamper.
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gryp




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, May 19 2011, 11:10 am
The best tip is to have a place for everything and that the kids should know where the stuff belongs. Ie. accessible hamper for dirty laundry, space in their drawers for clean laundry, accessible garbage cans for garbage, space on the shelves for toys and books, etc.

My kids earn points for making their beds every morning, hanging up their jackets and backpacks when they come in through the door from school, stuff like that.

When stuff is all over the room and no one is claiming responsibility, either I announce that each one is going to pick up a certain number of toys (depending on how many or on the floor), or I ask them to all close their eyes, spin around, and point to a spot in the room that they'll clean up- when they open their eyes, they see what they've "chosen." Usually with this they get silly and they'll point to the ceiling but it makes it fun and they do it happily. I'll also sometimes offer money for jobs- a penny for a small job, a nickel for a bigger one, and a quarter for a real big job. They love the chance to earn money so they can save it and then buy some little treat. We also have a big Erev Shabbos cleanup that is a must and no laziness allowed. I try to make it fun though so I don't get any bad attitudes.

If I see toys strewn about consistently, I tell them that I see no one really cares about the toys since they're on the floor, and I put them away for a few weeks or more. I've done that a few times, and now when I tell them I'm about to put a certain toy away, they come running to clean it up.
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