Warning; Parents magazine-explicit article

amother

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 2:52 pm

I sent this email to my friends and want to post here as well:

for those w/kids old enough to read, I want to warn you that there is an explicit article about whether or how to talk to your 4-5 year old about the 'birds and the bees' in Parents magazine dec. 2006. I received it free from 'viacord' - they must have had my name on a list from being an OB patient in the last year. many people may be getting this magazine like me, without choosing to, without subscription. it was easy to take myself off the free magazine list by calling 800-727-3682.

as if the explicity wasn't enough, there are also value assumptions in the article that we do not agree with................!

Crayon210

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 2:54 pm

I read it. It was no different than any other ridiculous liberal nonsense that I read in parenting magazines.

queen

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 2:56 pm

I am coming to the realization that all these parenting mags aren't really giving me any additional insite or help... but rather taking up room and a waste of time for me to read.

Am I the only one who feels like that?

Sparkle

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 2:58 pm

no, you're not.

And besides for all the junk, they use the same articles over and over again - just worded a bit differently so it'll sell!

Crayon210

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 3:10 pm

Uch, don't get me started.

I have recently read the following:

-if your child's ears protrude and others make fun of him, he should get surgery

-if your sister gives your daughter makeup for her birthday (5 or 6), let her wear it in the house, or on special occasions, and don't make your sister feel bad

-if your daughter wants to wear makeup, most girls are started in middle school, so for an 11-year-old, lip gloss and tinted lip balm are a good idea

-your marriage will never be the same again now that you have kids, so settle for an okay marriage and you'll be much happier

I wouldn't believe it if I hadn't read it myself.

I bring them straight to the bathroom, read them there, and then throw them out. Besides for the ideas, there are so many treif pictures that I don't want to subject the men who enter my house to them.

Motek

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 3:46 pm

Crayon210 wrote:

I bring them straight to the bathroom, read them there, and then throw them out. Besides for the ideas, there are so many treif pictures that I don't want to subject the men who enter my house to them.

Hey, crayon, in the N'Shei Chabad Newsletter in the "Open House" section, someone wrote a letter about material just like that, in the bathroom of a shlucha she visited and her point was that this material in the house is dangerous and can/will affect those exposed to it (you're not the only one who uses the bathroom!)

Crayon210

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 3:48 pm

Sorry...I keep them with my other papers until I go to the bathroom, then I read them there, then throw them out.

(I cannot believe I am having this discussion on the internet, LOL.)

gryp

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 3:50 pm

the articles in the parenting magazines in general are so full of nonsense they are laughable. I dont understand why anyone would subscribe to them.

LOL Crayon. Smile

MommyLuv

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 4:15 pm

I totally agree with you guys.

I got two free subscriptions when DD was born, I think American Baby and Parents, or something. It was in the trash the day I got it, every month basically. everything in it is totally recycled and all the medical articles are practically written for dummies, and yeah, lots of unwanted hashkafos too.
I was thinking, People actually pay for this stuff?

You'd think the editors would take childrearing advice a little more seriously than that....apparently not! Confused

amother

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 4:19 pm

I don't read Parents since I don't find it to be helpful, but would someone mind telling me what was so offensive about the article?

shayna82

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 4:20 pm

Crayon210 wrote:

I agree with your post 100%- its total garbage. I usually flip to the new toys page or something similar, then throw it in the garbage.

Meema2Kids

Tue, Nov 14 2006, 4:32 pm

Sometimes I find good coupons in the parenting mags. I feel like I've read all the articles before. Rolling Eyes

newmom

Wed, Nov 15 2006, 9:51 am

Crayon, I too read the article about getting the kid's ears fixed. Before I started reading, I thought that the article would definately say to wait until the child was really old enough to make a decision like that, (like if it bothered them way into their teen years) and in the mean time to encourage a healthy self image and self confidence. I was shocked that they thought that surgery was a great idea!

mali

Wed, Nov 15 2006, 2:27 pm

Besides, most Imamother members are much more experienced in child-raising than those "professionals" in the magazines.

momontherun

Thu, Nov 16 2006, 8:27 pm

I'm also so sick of these magazines. I read the article in Parents mentioned above. I couldn't believe they were talking about 4-5 year olds. The magazines are so liberal and the topics repeat themselves. I recently subscribed to Good Housekeeping and I love it. It's more conservative (It targets older women), and the articles are more interesting. Alot more true stories. Overall very good.

Mama Bear

Fri, Nov 17 2006, 1:22 am

I pay for a subscription to parents. I like the baby bloopers, sometims they have an intersting article about infertility or miracle babies, and I like seeing hte toys they spotlight. I never ever take their pareting 'advice' as meant for me.

amother

Fri, Nov 17 2006, 2:01 am

This is why I like Natural Jewish Parenting instead of secular parenting mags. It's totally kosher and original, and really helpful. I think it was discussed on this board before.

anonymous because I am not the natural type! Very Happy

HindaRochel

Fri, Nov 17 2006, 2:33 am

I have talked to my children about the birds and the bees from quite a young age. I start early and simply, adding and repeating information as I go on.

Other mothers have told me they don't do this.
Guess what.
My daughter has no interest in "love, boyfriends etc." the way some of the other girls do. She knows facts, and knows what the Torah says about love and relationships; the two go hand in hand. I try to explain everything in terms of the Torah from the start, and beautify the information.

Last year in her school, before I started homeschooling her, several of the children started discussing love and boyfriends etc. One mother insisted it was what the girls from another other place watched. (They go to school on our Yishuv; we are an Orthdox Yishuv the other Yishuv is not. I have my doubts about the origin of the conversation because I know what at least one girl watches and it is not stuff I would let my daughter watch.

For instance, I start talking about menstruation early, and explain that the mother's body makes a "bed" for the baby in a special place called the womb, and that every month, if there is no baby, the bed gets sloughed off so that if a baby does come, there will be a nice clean place for it, thus developing a positive attitude toward menstuation and fixing it within Torah.

I do tell her the facts of life. Passing two cats in the process of mating she said "I guess they are married". That is her mind set. She knows what is going on, she doesn't talk about the issues outside of the house (the way other girls do) she doesn't think about or care about who she will marry when she is older (the way other of her friends talk..) They just aren't in her mind.

Is it just the style of thinking of my children or is it the way I"m teaching them? I can't really say nor shall I say that one should discuss these issues early. But I am saying there may be good reasons for these discussions early on in life, because as they get older they are out and away from you more and these conversations can come up. Others who have learned the information from outside sources, t.v. or less religious friends, can spread the information, often false, and full of ideas that I think most of us would find repulsive.

As far as parenting magazines go, I agree with most of your assessment. They are dull, insipid and most aren't worth the paper they are written on. GH is go; wish I could afford that or Natural Parenting.

amother

Fri, Nov 17 2006, 2:41 am

Natural Jewish Parenting costs a little more than Parents, but not that much, and it is worth it! And you can always see if your Jewish library has it, if you have a Jewish library. Oh, now I see you are in Israel!! I don't know how it works there. Sorry! Do you have a friend you can share with?

leomom

Fri, Nov 17 2006, 2:47 am

amother wrote:

This is why I like Natural Jewish Parenting instead of secular parenting mags. It's totally kosher and original, and really helpful. I think it was discussed on this board before.