Tuition is killing us

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amother

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 3:47 pm

amother wrote:

This is the leadership in this generation?! No wonder the Jewish nation looks as it does.

Seriously. Amen to that. (again, the amother from above)... and I tried working in the Jewish community but decided that I wanted to maintain my dignity and my sanity.

I truly feel like the situation is hopelessly unsustainable. k

amother

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 3:54 pm

natrualgeek wrote:

school I smore then half of it,
and yes it is pre school nursery its considered childcare more then school

if it's more childcare than school then keep your child at home or send to a babysitter. my kids school doesn't give any tuition discounts for nursey, the theory being that kids that young could stay at home. it's once you get to actual chinuch that kids need school (and the tuition that goes along with it).

imaamy

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 4:20 pm

The school we left was about $15K. The numbers I'm seeing on this thread seem low to me, although I don't know how people afford it out here as cost of living, food, shuls are all very expensive.

amother

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 4:21 pm

another single mom here of a few children. I am struggling like crazy and don't know what to do. My only options right now are to put them in a school which hashkafically is not really where we are, or public school. So it's either go the frummer /chasidish route or not. And I am so torn because I want them in a Jewish school but I feel that they will not learn enough to get them on the right path for a better future.

eschaya

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 4:23 pm

Tuition for my 5 yo this past year was $11K+. It's killing us too, along with most frum Jews nowadays. I wish there were a good solution.

farm

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 4:44 pm

amother wrote:

when I finish grad school, I'm looking at 50-60K per year

Lilkingdom

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 4:57 pm

unfortunately tuition is a killer especially in Brookly. I have two kids under the age 5 and pay a total combined tuition of about $14000 a year without bus which is $1400. plus over $2000 daycamp. I know there are schools that charge much more but at this rate, I don't think I can afford to have any more kids!

Tova

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 5:00 pm

farm wrote:

amother wrote:

when I finish grad school, I'm looking at 50-60K per year

Of this whole thread that's the sentence you pick to frown at? Wink

Lilkingdom

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 5:01 pm

amother wrote:

natrualgeek wrote:

school I smore then half of it,
and yes it is pre school nursery its considered childcare more then school

Actually, I think the younger you start, the better it is. Kids absorb much better at real young age. My kindergarten girl can write upper case and lower case letters, all alef beis, knows all sounds and can read simple words! Plus all yom tov lessons and such. She knows so much. Why would I let a brilliant little brain sit home with toys or be wasted with so called home schooling activities? It's at this age that they also develop good play and social skills when among kids.

amother

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 5:11 pm

Lilkingdom wrote:

amother wrote:

natrualgeek wrote:

school I smore then half of it,
and yes it is pre school nursery its considered childcare more then school

if she's learning so much then it's not considered "more childcare than school"! that was the point I was trying to bring out.

amother

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 5:16 pm

Hey Original AM here
Its not only the amount that they are charging, its the fact that tution goes up so much every year.
my tution is increasing almost 20% will it increase $20 again next year
were does it end ?????
We pay our taxes, we are memebers of a shul all we do is pay pay pay and always someone expects us to come up with even more money .
I want secular studies to be free, I havethat right as a tax paying citizen.
Also I know that evven the frum yeshivas are getting money from the government.
so why cant I \get that credited towards my tution?

Barbara

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 5:23 pm

amother wrote:

Look, I hear your pain, and I'm right there with you. But remember:

(1) You have the right to send your child to public school, and to get a free secular education for your kids. You choose not to do so. I choose not to do so. It hurts to write those checks, and to know how different our lives could be with that money. But it is our choice.

(2) The money that schools receive from the government IS credited to you. You'd be paying more money otherwise.

I've said it before. I'll say it again. We need to change the paradigm of day school education, because it is not sustainable in the long term. Its going to take brave souls to send kids to public schools, or to find new funding sources (eg, paying out over a lifetime, but then we'd need to somehow secure that payment). Sorry.

amother

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 5:25 pm

amother wrote:

I want secular studies to be free, I havethat right as a tax paying citizen.
Also I know that evven the frum yeshivas are getting money from the government.
so why cant I \get that credited towards my tution?

(I'm the amother talking about public school - and also unhappy that I'm only going to be making 50-60K after grad school, but that's another story...)

I firmly, firmly believe that it is NOT the government's responsibility to fund segregated, religious schools. If Jewish parents want their kids to have secular studies in a strictly Jewish environment, the government should NOT be paying. I know that's how they do it in Canada, but I think it's for the best that it's not that way in the U.S. Frankly, I don't want the government to fund secular studies in Evangelical Christian schools, either.

We only have the right for secular studies to be free in PUBLIC schools, because that's how the U.S. decided it would invest in educating its citizens. I just wish the frum world would not be so opposed to public schools, particularly in the earlier grades, when negative influences are fewer and Hebrew/Jewish stuff can be done in a fewer number of hours.

amother

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 5:29 pm

we are paying over our lifetime no matter how you look at it
I keep my chilren in frum schools more for my parents then for myself
truth be told if it wouldnt kill them I would put them in public school and pay for a jewish tutor.
There are three near my home, and I am always seeing boys with kipas and girls that are very clearly jewish there.
Its hard very hard and people are right instead of paying millions for an assifa on internet or on other issues that are not that important lets pay our teachers and ease the burden of the parents a bit.
Let the rabbis face the fact that jewish education is becoming to expnecive. I havetwp kids and I dont think we could afford a third, only because of tuition nothing else!!

amother

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 5:50 pm

For all of you who think you can't afford tuition, how about $25,000-$35,000 a year for a child with learning disabilities to go to a special yeshiva?! And I have two kids like this. That's not including my other kids who go to the "regular" yeshiva at a cost of $10,000/year. We literally cannot afford to buy food, pay the gas and electric bill, etc. My kids survive on cereal and pasta all week. We can't afford to have Shabbos guests because we can't afford to buy extra food. We recently almost had our electricity turned off because we couldn't pay the bill. I get all of my kids clothes at a gemach. It goes on and on. And both my husband and I work.

I try to remember to be thankful that I send my kids to religious schools and they are getting a good Jewish education. I'm a baalas teshuva and I went to public schools all my life. So I am so happy that they are learning Torah. I just wish it didn't have to break the bank...

black sheep

Wed, Jun 20 2012, 6:07 pm

tuition is one of our biggest problems in the jewish communities (outside of EY.) it is the greatest birth control there is. and even with the use of BC, families are overburdened with enormous debt because of the cost of tuition. and the stress it puts on families extends to other areas as well, and leads to many other problems (SB problems, children being raised in a stressful environment, temptation to be less stringent in business ethics out of desperation....) honestly, I agree with the poster who suggested we could have used an asifa to address this issue, rather than spending such a large amount of community funds to tell men not to watch [filth].

federal funding will not solve the problem. first of all, the schools do get federal funding, just not equal to the public schools. second of all, you don't deserve to have public funds because of a lifestyle choice. as another poster said, you are entitled to walk into your local district's public school and put your child in today. literally today. we chose not to, that doesn't give us the right to take federal money for our choice.

in canada they get a lot more federal money than we do for jewish schools, and tuition is just as bad. I have a friend with three daughters in toronto, and she pays 35,000 for her three girls. that's about 12,000 per child, similar to brooklyn schools. and that is after she negotiated a huge tuition break!

I am warming up to the idea that sending all our kids to public school and supplementing the jewish education is not such a bad idea. I would never send my child to a school where he is the only jew, especially in a very bad neighborhood. but if frum jews in general would start sending to public school, the kids would have frum friends, and get their secular education for free, and then have a rebbe every evening for jewish stuff. when I think about the house I could have paid for by now for the amount of tuition I've paid so far, and how much more there is ahead of me, I try to remember what was so bad with public school but it isn't coming to me, blocked by the image of financial security...

I know one of the reasons for private jewish schools is to shelter our children and keep them "innocent" longer. but can't we address how to keep them innocent while at the same time interacting with the secular world?

OP, I feel your pain. we all do. I really believe it is our biggest, most widespread problem today.