I passed by dd's bunk and....

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Post  Fri, Jun 29 2012, 12:31 pm
She was sitting alone off to the side while the rest of the kids were playing steal the salami. She was smiling, and looked ok, but I didn't like how she was out of it, and not engaged with the other girls. She is generally a quiet kid, slow to warm up to new people, but B"H has many friends in school and at home, had no social issues and is well liked by kids her age. (she's 8.)

Should I be concerned about this? Or should I just give her time to get acclimated to bunk? (she knows these girls from last year). Also the counselor is a teenager not an adult, how much can she do if my dd asks to watch game and not play? She's not misbehaving, just out of things.

So worried about her, I really want her to make friends and enjoy her summer.

Any advice?
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Post  Fri, Jun 29 2012, 12:40 pm
It's possible that she just did not like that game.
If she is always sitting on the side then that is a problem.

Young counselors have 2 goals: to control their bunk and please the parents. If your kid was not participating but not misbehaving, the counselor would see no reason to tell you. Even if you ask her how your daughter is doing socially, she might gloss over the problem.

I think a great way to help your kids socially is by having them invite friends over. In the "safety" of their own home they can practice good social skills.
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Post  Fri, Jun 29 2012, 12:51 pm
Amother, my 7 year old son LOVES watching people. I mean he is so much happier and gets such hana'ah out of it, compared to playing many things. He frequently sits out so he can watch, and for things like this I'm totally ok with it. It's not due to a discomfort socially so it's not coddling that. It's not due to a low self-esteem (feeling like he can't)...but really, he gets such a kick out of watching people play. I wrote on his camp paper that he is very happy watching and not to force him to participate as my goal for him being in camp is for him to enjoy himself. It's so necessary for him as a reprieve from school where he has to participate in things he otherwise wouldn't like to.

There are plenty of other activities he does participate in that I do not worry about the times he doesn't.

Your daughter seems similar. Since you say she's socially adjusted and is smiling, I would not do a single thing about it.
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