Love the Enneagram

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Love the Enneagram

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2boyzn1girl

Sun, Jul 22 2012, 10:34 am

Personally, I am not a four but I'm surrounded by them! My best friend, my sister AND my 18 year old (only) daughter. Myself I have strong 7 tendencies but others think I'm too responsible and grounded to be a 7.

zaq

Sun, Jul 22 2012, 11:06 am

huh? perush rashi, please?

gp2.0

Sun, Jul 22 2012, 11:50 am

I regard all these personality tests the same way as I do horoscopes. The descriptions are always very careful to give general information that could technically fit anyone.

When I tried taking a test, many of the answers were conflicting - can't I be down to earth AND imaginative? Can't I avoid confrontation with strangers but seek it out with family and friends? Can't I procrastinate AND be goal-oriented?

Shalshelet

Sun, Jul 22 2012, 12:08 pm

gp2.0 wrote:

You are right in that there is information that could technically fit anyone, and each one of us fit into most or all of the types, but I think you may be missing the point. Your type is what is strongest in you. What drives you. That is what defines your personality type. There are people who are down to earth AND imaginative, but which one is stronger? We can avoid confrontation with strangers AND still seek it out with closer people, but what is the root cause for doing so? We can procrastinate AND be goal oriented, but which do we do most of the time?

We each have some of everything. When I took my test, I scored high in some and low in others, it was what was the strongest that really made the difference.

What I really find fascinating and love about the enneagram is that there are myriads of levels and combinations - from "at best"/healthy to "at worst"/unhealthy (I think there are 9 levels for each type) - and then you have either one of two wings (which is one of the two types that are classified prior to and after your type. And with that you also have 1 of 9 different levels a person could be on). And then you have to factor in the direction of integration or disintegration(I may have forgotten the term), which is the type whose 'traits' are embodied via growth or decline, and each of those also has 9 different levels. So really, if you can weed things down, you can actually have a vast range of SPECIFIC expressions of many different personality types.

climbing613

Sun, Jul 22 2012, 12:22 pm

I just took it for curiousity's sake and found it to be uniquely accurate it pretty much all areas. It was interesting, because it didn't match how I would describe myself, but after reading their description, I found almost exactly right in every detail.

Zehava

Sun, Jul 22 2012, 12:30 pm

Four with a strong five wing! Wish I'd be surrounded by fours it would make life easier! Dh is a two with a one wing

chani8

Sun, Jul 22 2012, 1:00 pm

Which web site did you go to for this online test??

Zehava

Sun, Jul 22 2012, 1:07 pm

You google the word enneagram you get like 5 of them

enneamom

Sun, Jul 22 2012, 2:38 pm

2boyzn1girl wrote:

You sound like a 6, like me! LOL

Guess I love the enneagram enough to make it my screen name. What does THAT say about my personality? LOL

(I think it's my 5 analytic streak and 6 dogged loyalty to ideas and 7 tendency to get very "into" various interests. Also the fact that I signed up for Imamother soon after reading the book.)

return2You

Sun, Oct 25 2015, 7:51 pm

I know this thread is old but I was just wondering about the accuracy of the test.

I took on two different sites, once it came out to 4, individualist, second time came out to reformer

Is this another hocus- pocus?

youngishbear

Sun, Oct 25 2015, 9:11 pm

Different test will have different degrees of accuracy.

What I love about the enneagram is how it gets to the heart of our underlying motivations.

Some people don't like personality systems because they feel like it reduces 7+ billion people into 9 types, and that, they claim, is impossible.

I agree. But the enneagram is much more complex than the 9 basic types. It also gives us so much insight into why people do the things they do. I feel like, instead of judging people (like some anti-personality system-ers fear) I am more understanding and accepting of others when I understand why we don't see eye to eye on something.

return2You

Sun, Oct 25 2015, 9:16 pm

youngishbear wrote:

My issue with it is that people go through life altering situations which can actually change their personality.
As people age, their perspective on life changes, their personality type changes too.

The human being is so vast, so infinite, how can you peg someone down to one( or three, if you have a " wing" or two) number?!

So much is dependent on environmental factors, and a person's desire to change.

chatz

Sun, Oct 25 2015, 9:17 pm

I think you get a better understanding of the enneagram by reading a book rather than taking an online test. I like Miriam adahan's book (Awareness) overall because of its readability and practicality, but I feel she has some biases that come through.

Her point of these personality types is awareness. Awareness of yourself- your strengths and weaknesses and where you should direct yourself- and awareness of others. It is often much easier to deal with people, their actions, comments, or lack thereof when you understand their personality type.

chatz

Sun, Oct 25 2015, 9:19 pm

I don't think people's underlying personality changes. They may mature. Their actions may change. But I don't think that changes what makes them tick

return2You

Sun, Oct 25 2015, 9:20 pm

chatz wrote:

I don't think people's underlying personality changes. They may mature. Their actions may change. But I don't think that changes what makes them tick

It has for me.

Drastically.

youngishbear

Sun, Oct 25 2015, 9:24 pm

return2You wrote:

It has for me.

Drastically.

Your motivations, too?

The things that bring you joy? The things that bring you comfort? Your primary needs?

One big goal of learning the enneagram is that we should travel to our point of integration and pick up character traits that we need to.

I think Miriam Adahan has said that about 60% of our personality stays the same, but we can stretch and grow the rest. That's a lot of flexibility, but not in our core essence.

return2You

Sun, Oct 25 2015, 9:26 pm

For example, a type seven can go through severe abuse As a child and become a four as a result.

youngishbear

Sun, Oct 25 2015, 9:30 pm

return2You wrote:

For example, a type seven can go through severe abuse As a child and become a four as a result.

Are you thinking of depression or the introverted effects of trauma? It can strike any type, not necessarily turn them into a four.

Also, the issue of childhood trauma and personality is a complex one. Childhood experiences do play a part in shaping our personality.

I wonder if anyone's core personality as defined by the enneagram can completely change through events in adulthood.

return2You

Sun, Oct 25 2015, 9:50 pm

youngishbear wrote:

I think it can if the outside factors are prolonged and extreme enough. Think about it- a type one can become a type six, say they become really disillusioned and are forced to change.

Have you never witnessed dramatic personality shifts? It can and does happen.

Think about the really innocent, matter of fact , in the box young girl who goes OTD and becomes angry, cerebral, withdrawn.

Think about the outgoing, loud, GO head who develops severe emotional disorders as a result of outside stress and becomes withdrawn, thinking, Moody, all that thinking and moodiness may lead to creativity, which develops itself into a healthy passion for new things.

Think about the outgoing, warm girl who marries an abusive husband and becomes introverted and closed. After emerging from that situation, the positive outcome may result in a completely new personality type.

The enneagram reflects what we are now.

I'm not very articulate here, but this whole typing thing bothers me deeply.

The way I see it, humans are not set in stone. Our neshama ( or personality) as a part of Hashem, is infinite and capable of anything- for better or worse.

youngishbear

Sun, Oct 25 2015, 10:10 pm

Dramatic changes, especially downward changes, are a red flag for a reason. Of course people grow and change. But if Miss Fun becomes Miss Serious without leaving some room in her life for the things that bring her pleasure, she will be miserable.

If you ask abuse survivors, they want their old selves back. And with therapy, they can heal and go back there.

Again, childhood experiences do shape our personality. And personality expressions are not set in stone. A type 4 can learn to be disciplined like a 1, but what brings them satisfaction and motivates them will always be the connection and emotional depth of their 4 core.

I think you're looking at this like a medical diagnosis, when it really isn't. For me it's a tool to understand why my sister who is a one should not be the person I kvetch to about my difficulty with my housekeeping routine because she cannot understand how hard it is for me. She can, however, be the perfect source for tips on housekeeping.

It helps me let go of unrealistic expectations of people. My 7 friend will never agree to come to a museum with me. And I will not bore my 3 friend with a discussion about the enneagram.

Unless they choose to develop that side of themselves, in which case I'd be thrilled to share the ride with them.

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