My ds-6 yrs always feels deprived- eats till he almost sicks

amother

Tue, Jul 24 2012, 12:53 pm

Yes! I have no idea what to do.

I serve him healthy food and try to minimize snacks. Yet he always asks for more - just because.

I could see he stuffs himself and then asks for all his siblings portions!!

He is full of energy and B"H weight is average for his age, but how do I get him to stop overeating? When I tried limiting his portions, he just screams that he is still hungry (not the case I serve generous enough).

Nothing is ever enough for him. I could see he stuffs his mouth and is almost on the verge of throwing up very often. This has been ongoing for almost 3 yrs.

How do I put a stop to it with making him feel deprived, and I want him healthy BE"H!

flowerpower

Tue, Jul 24 2012, 12:56 pm

Seems that he has an issue with food. Tell him that it takes 20 minutes to feel full. Once he finishes supper he should look at the watch and see when 20 minutes is. If he is still hungry then he can take a fruit or healthy snack. Explain to him what happens when a person overeats... When my kids complain that they are hungry I tell then to take whatever they want from the fridge. It's usually stocked up with produce so they have freedom of (healthy) choices yet don't feel deprived. Also, if he ask for food close to dinner time tell him to wait until supper is served. That is called discipline and will help him wait a bit.

SS6099

Tue, Jul 24 2012, 1:09 pm

I have the same issue with my 6-yr-old DS.
He wolfs down his food before DD barely starts.
We're working on him eating slower to have the food last longer and he'll feel fuller. It's a long process but hopefully we'll see results. The main thing is that I don't want him to feel deprived. I keep on telling him that after 20 minutes, if he's still hungry, he could have as much as he wants.

Barbara

Tue, Jul 24 2012, 1:36 pm

gp2.0 wrote:

You say his weight is average. So why not let him eat as much as he wants? How can you tell he's on the verge of throwing up? Does he ever actually throw up? I would ask a ped if this is normal behavior.

Agreed.

OP says that he eats large quantities of food, but is still average weight. That suggests to me that he needs that food.

I'd talk to his pediatrician at his next well child visit to make sure that there are no other issues, then let him eat.

amother

Tue, Jul 24 2012, 1:42 pm

gp2.0 wrote:

OP here:

I know my child!!! I know the food portions I offer him, could serve my 3 kids combined. I know his main issue is the food and feeling deprived, rather then the actual eating.

My son is also needy in other areas (jealous of younger siblings) so because he does not always feel great about himself, I DEFINITELY don't want to make the issue an EMOTIONAL FOOD CHASE...

Its come to the stage already where in my house nush is a big no-no ( till recently only shabbos,) that I privately give him nush = sugary sweets on occasions, becasue ''all the boys have'' so thats my next problem
.. his always focused on the food concept of ''not having/needing'' etc... so I run to the pantry and give him because then he begs to go to a friends house (nush ofcourse!!!) so I pretend theirs no issue with it.

I know it sounds like Im giving into him, but I thought alot about it, the occasional nush during the wk, wont kill but a NO would.

As for the ideas of waiting 20 min with him, maybe I might try. I can c it being a strugle Rolling Eyes

I have loads of fresh produce in my fruit bowl and my kids know they can help themselves to veggies from the fridge, whenever..

saw50st8

Tue, Jul 24 2012, 1:57 pm

I had a similar issue with my 2 year old. He was eating way too much (he could eat a canteloupe in 1 sitting!). He seemed genuinly hungry and I hated to limit his food because I had always been told that kids eat until they are full until a much older age. Also, the food he was eating was healthy - fruits and vegetables!

After discussing it with the pediatrician, we limit him to a normal portion size. We didn't cut him down immediately but did it over a month or so. Now we don't limit him because he eats normal portion sizes. You may need to retrain his stomach.

spring13

Tue, Jul 24 2012, 1:58 pm

I'd talk to the pediatrician. some people have issues where they never really feel satiated; it's not that they need more nutrition, it's that their brains don't send out the signal that means "that's enough for now" efficiently.

I don't know how common this is; I'm sure there are other potential causes for this kind of behavior. but if you're feeding him dramatically more than your other kids eat and he's still demanding more, claiming he's not full, I'd want to figure out if there's some underlying physical/chemical/psychological reason for it.

chocolate chips

Tue, Jul 24 2012, 2:05 pm

I sometimes have this.

I eat very fast, and then even though I feel stuffed I don't feel FULL. I usually need a sweet fruit or snack or ice cream to finish off my meal and even then sometimes I like to pick or nash other stuff.
I am not fat nor am I an overeater I just eat too fast so I don't get full.
Its hard to eat slower than normal especially if you are really hungry.
Perhaps make sure he gets a snack (cookie, cracker, fruit etc) every hour or so so that when it comes to meals he shouldn't be SO hungry that he has to stuff the food in and then not feel full.
The idea of waiting 20minutes is a good one but sometimes very hard especially for little kids.

Talk to your ped. to see if there is anything else you can do for your son. Otherwise if he is healthy and good weight don't worry so much, he might get over it.

cbsmommy

Tue, Jul 24 2012, 2:10 pm

Barbara wrote:

gp2.0 wrote:

If you're concerned, rather than waiting for his next well child visit, make an appointment to speak with the pediatrician now.

Thoughts to ponder:
1) This could be an underlying medical issue: Celiac Disease, hyperthyroid, Crohn's and Ulcerative Colitis can make a child absolutely starving, but underweight/normal weight.
2) This could be an underlying issue with satiation. Lepitin is a hormone that controls eating. Hormones can be wacky things. He might feel hungry and want to eat and when his signals finally catch up with him, he feels like vomiting.
3) The internet is never an effective means of diagnosing an issue in a child. Taking a child to the doctor, having the doctor assess height/weight and look at his growth charts is far far more effective. If, however, you are online because your doctor has 'poo-poo'-ed you and said there's no issue (but you know your child and think that something ain't quite right) there are a number of wonderful imamother's who'd be happy to suggest pediatricians that we feel listen. Just let us know where you are located.

amother

Tue, Jul 24 2012, 2:27 pm

cbsmommy wrote:

Barbara wrote:

gp2.0 wrote:

If you're concerned, rather than waiting for his next well child visit, make an appointment to speak with the pediatrician now.
[b]
Thoughts to ponder:
1) This could be an underlying medical issue: Celiac Disease, hyperthyroid, Crohn's and Ulcerative Colitis can make a child absolutely starving, but underweight/normal weight.
2) This could be an underlying issue with satiation. Lepitin is a hormone that controls eating. Hormones can be wacky things. He might feel hungry and want to eat and when his signals finally catch up with him, he feels like vomiting.
3) The internet is never an effective means of diagnosing an issue in a child. Taking a child to the doctor, having the doctor assess height/weight and look at his growth charts is far far more effective. If, however, you are online because your doctor has 'poo-poo'-ed you and said there's no issue (but you know your child and think that something ain't quite right) there are a number of wonderful imamother's who'd be happy to suggest pediatricians that we feel listen. Just let us know where you are located.

OP: Oh! I really appreciate this advice! I love your options!! Ofcourse number 3 - is just as you claim, but I might have to consider switching Peds and see if I need to do Bloodwork?

ChocChips- Great Idea about making sure he has sufficient snack before supper, Believe me he is really full by the time he comes home. He eats lunch at 12:30 -1:00 pm, and then gets some more snack before he comes home approx. three.

As soon as ds arrives home, he demands another snack... so snack after snack should really eliminate appetite for supper!

flowerpower

Tue, Jul 24 2012, 2:33 pm

gp2.0 wrote:

Sorry but I don't agree. Now he is an average size but in two years when the dr. says he is overweigh it will be a problem. You have to start working on good eating habits at a young age-no matter what size the child is. My nine year olds tells me all night that he is hungry. Right now he is exactly average. I do not let him eat what he wants because "he is still hungry". I tell him that he had a full supper and if he is really hungry then he can eat a fruit or vegetable. After peeling himself a cucumber and eating a few pieces of baby carrots he suddenly forgets that he is "
hungry".

amother

Wed, Jul 25 2012, 8:12 am

Sorry to hear of your child's difficulties. When my son was a bit older than yours, we moved to a new community. It took me a rather long time to realize that my son was eating way too much (He would ask for the last piece of pizza when he still had plenty on his plate.) It finally hit me that everything he was doing was because of emotional issues with the move. Once we realized there were these other issues, and started to work on those issues, the food problem was easier to handle and disappeared. Food is a control thing. Everything else was out of his control, but food was not...It was also a comfort thing.
In the meantime, though, I did what you are doing, limited what he had to eat, provided healthy snacks, and watched the calories for treats. He had been a skinny kid like his siblings, who did gain weight after awhile of overeating, but ultimately lost it.
I'm not implying that your child might have some other issues, just saying that as a parent who was always so intune with my kids emotional and psychological needs, I missed this one big time. Just realizing that something else was going on, allowed me to begin helping my child. Once I did, food was no longer an issue.

gp2.0

Wed, Jul 25 2012, 8:37 am

flowerpower wrote:

gp2.0 wrote:

By telling him he can have a fruit or vegetable, you ARE telling him he can eat as much as he wants, aren't you? That's what I meant.

Barbara

Wed, Jul 25 2012, 9:08 am

flowerpower wrote:

gp2.0 wrote:

"Good eating habits" include eating healthful foods when hungry, and not eating when not hungry. I'd really be loathe to tell a child who claims to be hungry -- whether or not overweight -- that he cannot have food. Indeed, that could well cause even more food-related problems, as the child could begin to horde or sneak food, or otherwise allow food to take on a significance that it should not have.

No one is suggesting that the child be offered cookies and ice cream if he's hungry after dinner. But lean proteins, fruits and vegetables (as you offer your child) should be offered.

gp2.0

Wed, Jul 25 2012, 9:36 am

Barbara wrote:

flowerpower wrote:

gp2.0 wrote:

Yes. All of this. Just had no patience to type it all. Very Happy

Also, just an idea, maybe he is craving more physical affection? Hugs, bedtime stories, really listen to all his problems he had throughout the day, etc.? I know some kids really need this more than others.