What to wear? | Imamother

miami85

Thu, Jul 25 2013, 10:54 pm

Somewhat hypothetical at this point, but What to wear to a niece's wedding to whom you are close in age?
I don't necessarily want to wear a gown, but I don't think I should wear my regular chasuna outfit.

chocolate chips

Thu, Jul 25 2013, 11:06 pm

There are actually many nice long dresses out there now that are not so much "gown" style but still nice and fancy for a family simcha.

Alternatively look for black tie short dresses. These are nicer than your regular wedding dress but short.

http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/ha....._11_D

http://www1.macys.com/shop/pro.....d%3D3

http://www1.macys.com/shop/pro.....%3D25

http://www1.macys.com/shop/pro.....%3D45

Good Luck!

miami85

Fri, Jul 26 2013, 12:04 pm

What about something like this? And get a matching shell--Don't know what color yet.

http://www.lightinthebox.com/A......html

Is this a dress that I could have shortened afterward?

PinkFridge

Fri, Jul 26 2013, 1:57 pm

miami85 wrote:

Does your niece have any adult cousins your age? What would they wear?
And what about the aunts? They probably wouldn't wear regular chasuna outfits, or else would do something to oomph them a bit.

TranquilityAndPeace

Fri, Jul 26 2013, 3:03 pm

I just bought this for my son's bar mitzvah http://shop.nordstrom.com/s/pa.....1_4_C I bought matching pink/beige fabric to fully line the top lace area so that it doesn't look like my undergarments are showing through the lace.

(My dress from last year's bar mitzvah sadly doesn't fit at all, but I have the best reason for that - it's my baby's fault!)

P.S. I bought too much of the pink/beige fabric, so if you go with this, I can mail you some of it!

miami85

Thu, Aug 01 2013, 10:36 pm

Ok, its no longer hypothetical. My niece is engaged--she'll be 22 and I'll be 28. The only other married adult cousin will be probably still expecting at that point--at her wedding I was still single so I wore a gown. My only sister and sister-in-law (not mother of kallah) are much older and there are 2 more aunts on my sister-in-law's side--also at least 10 years older than me.

My sister will probably wear her regular chasuna outfit, but I'm much closer and closer in age to my niece.
Do I get something full length? Short? In between? Do I try to fit into the color scheme? Do I wear black and be safe?
I probably need something new b/c I'm not sure what fits me right now.
HELP! What's normal for young married aunts to wear at weddings?

srbmom

Thu, Aug 01 2013, 11:10 pm

Do you have the store Ross by you? I bought a nice floor-length fancy dress there for a friends wedding for $14!!! They also have a lot of size choices.

chocolate chips

Thu, Aug 01 2013, 11:17 pm

I think you can wear whatever you feel comfortable in.

I would probably go with long since you are both young and close to the kallah. It doesn't matter if the other relatives won't be.

I like the pink one you linked up there. Just be careful when ordering from these sites sometimes they are not so perfect.

Lady Godiva

Thu, Aug 01 2013, 11:24 pm

Everybody is wearing gowns at weddings now. Even friends of the bride. You probably should wear a floor length dress. (I'm assuming it's a formal event.)

sleepyhead

Fri, Aug 02 2013, 12:23 am

miami85 wrote:

What about something like this? And get a matching shell--Don't know what color yet.

http://www.lightinthebox.com/A......html

Is this a dress that I could have shortened afterward?

I can't view this dress, it's getting blocked by my filter for some reason.... [I also don't want to take over the thread, just one question -] Do the dresses on this site actually look as good in real life? Or do they look cheap once you hold them in your hand? Does anyone have any experience with this site? I think some of the dresses are beautiful, and very reasonably priced.

Ruchel

Fri, Aug 02 2013, 5:31 am

No offense but I find the gown thing very weird, unless MAYBE you are the mother of the bride- and even then, it's a bit odd. I feel like women want to play kalla or something. Sorry Smile

FranticFrummie

Fri, Aug 02 2013, 7:43 am

miami85 wrote:

What about something like this? And get a matching shell--Don't know what color yet.

http://www.lightinthebox.com/A......html

Is this a dress that I could have shortened afterward?

Pretty! Very flattering. If you're nervous about wearing a full gown, you can have it shortened to 3/4 or "midi" length, and use the extra fabric to make a bow, headband, or something else cute to coordinate.

From the weddings and bar mitzvas I've been to in Crown Heights and in London, women close to the family wear long gowns with a formal look, and older people, further away from the family wear very dressy, well tailored Shabbos suits.

Hope that helps!

PinkFridge

Fri, Aug 02 2013, 9:08 am

Ruchel wrote:

No offense but I find the gown thing very weird, unless MAYBE you are the mother of the bride- and even then, it's a bit odd. I feel like women want to play kalla or something. Sorry Smile

Do you find it weird for sisters?
Also, in America now lots of people are wearing maxi dresses, casual for weekdays, so there is a lot available - pretty long sleeveless dresses that can work with a shell for a simcha. So it's definitely not odd.
What I find disconcerting is when close relatives wear white or off white gowns that are sometimes as pretty or prettier than the kallah's gown.

amother

Fri, Aug 02 2013, 1:02 pm

I was recently at a very upscale wedding (not my usual venue) and a lot of people were wearing gowns or floor-length dresses (less 'gown'-like but long) and I am pretty sure they were not all immediate family. One, I know, was a first cousin of kallah's mother.

I recall back in the day (I'm a bubby now) wearing a gown to a friend's wedding. I think it was the style at some point.

So is that the style today? Any length you like?

Ruchel, I don't know if it's wanting to be a kallah. Maybe it's wanting to be a victorian maiden or matron. There is really something elegant about a long gown, especially if it kind of puffs when you walk, no?

I have only one sister, and I own a gown I bought for my kids' weddings. So I usually wear it to nieces & nephews because what I normally wear to just any wedding isn't quite dressy enough.

(Anon bec if you see me in my gown you will know who I am!)

Lady Godiva

Fri, Aug 02 2013, 1:46 pm

Ruchel wrote:

No offense but I find the gown thing very weird, unless MAYBE you are the mother of the bride- and even then, it's a bit odd. I feel like women want to play kalla or something. Sorry Smile

Some brides request that their relatives and friends wear floor length gowns, because they want their wedding to be a very formal affair. Some weddings invitations request "Black Tie" on them, expecting guest to dress very formally.

In the U.S. it's expected that the immediate relatives of the bride and groom will wear gowns. Some of us live in the metaphorical Land of Hollywood...

Lady Godiva

Fri, Aug 02 2013, 1:48 pm

amother wrote:

I figured you out from this post!

Just kidding.