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Forum
-> Yom Tov / Holidays
-> Purim
nicole81
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 Sat, Feb 27 2010, 11:46 pm
my shul welcomes entire families to come to the megillah readings, regardless of age.
there were 2 minyans in our shul tonight and we went to the smaller one. there were maybe 20 kids under 5 and they were perfectly behaved.
but the other minyan was a different story. they were still going well after we finished and it was so wild, the rabbi had to use a microphone just to be heard. kids were running around, yelling, and using their groggers every second. parents just sat there and ignored.
at least if you bring your kids, try your best to keep them quiet!
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Rodent
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Sun, Feb 28 2010, 1:47 am
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I didn't go anywhere. We have a megilla at home that my husband reads from. Night was easy, they were asleep. Morning was more difficult.
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Mimisinger
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Sun, Feb 28 2010, 2:19 am
I haven't read the 9 pages, nor will I, but it seems that Shalhevet, you need to go to a different shul.
At our shul, there is the megilla, then, a separate woman's megilla reading after, and while the woman's megilla is going on, the father's take the children to the children's megilla reading - a few perekim that are read so the kids can shake their graggers at Haman's name and cheer for Mordechai and Esther.
NO ONE brings in little kids. All shuls should have this, though this is the first year that we have a kid's reading.
At the same time, our shul, every single shabbos does not let children (who can't sit quietly) in during davening. Shul is for davening and when the kids are old enough to sit quietly, they can come in. Little kids go in for adon olam at the very end. That's it. Otherwise, the kids and mom's play outside shul.
It's all about chinuch. What are you teaching your kids. Are you teaching them that shul is a place to pray or play?
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mummy-bh
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Sun, Feb 28 2010, 10:56 am
I am right now home with my little ones whilst everybody else is in shul. I will go later, IY"H. I took the twins to shul for leining for Parshas zochor and they just about lasted through that, no way I could expect them to shush for 40 mins+, it just wouldn't be fair. So we are home playing and talking about Purim and singing songs 
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gold21
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Sun, Feb 28 2010, 12:15 pm
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I would be concerned about my children if they had no problem sitting silently for 35 minutes. they are kids, therefore they should have limited attention spans, and should make noise. (mine are 3 and three quarters and 1 and a half KAH.) so they dont come to megillah reading.
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Marion
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Sun, Feb 28 2010, 12:21 pm
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When I heard that the shul decided that the women's reading wouldn't be until 9:30, and even then not IN the shul, but 20 minutes away, I will admit that I was sorely tempted to take my kids. But they were asleep, so it was a non-starter.
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chocolate moose
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Sun, Feb 28 2010, 12:27 pm
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I am amazed at how many late night megillah readings have little kids at them.
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shalhevet
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Sun, Feb 28 2010, 1:49 pm
| Mimisinger wrote: | I haven't read the 9 pages, nor will I, but it seems that Shalhevet, you need to go to a different shul.
At our shul, there is the megilla, then, a separate woman's megilla reading after, and while the woman's megilla is going on, the father's take the children to the children's megilla reading - a few perekim that are read so the kids can shake their graggers at Haman's name and cheer for Mordechai and Esther.
NO ONE brings in little kids. All shuls should have this, though this is the first year that we have a kid's reading.
At the same time, our shul, every single shabbos does not let children (who can't sit quietly) in during davening. Shul is for davening and when the kids are old enough to sit quietly, they can come in. Little kids go in for adon olam at the very end. That's it. Otherwise, the kids and mom's play outside shul.
It's all about chinuch. What are you teaching your kids. Are you teaching them that shul is a place to pray or play? |
I never did go back to that shul for night megilla (I was actually there for shacharis today, and it was fine). Last night was the first time we all went as a family to the megilla in a different shul, since my youngest is now 5. There were many children there, but no one, absolutely no one disturbed or spoke. The reason is these children have been given chinuch that you don't disturb during the megilla (even the Hamans were about two seconds long). They have been given this chinuch not by being taken as babies "so their neshama will hear the megilla" or something similar someone wrote that I re-read here on page 2 or 3. They have been given chinuch NOT to be in shul as little children, so that when they do come, at the age of 4 or 5 all the 5 and 6 and 7 year olds around them are perfectly quiet, so they are too.
(No one brought babies or toddlers; there are women's readings in my town for the mothers.)
So, absolutely, mimisinger.
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avigayil
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Sun, Feb 28 2010, 8:56 pm
I took my daughter when she was an infant to a womens reading. She nursed the whole time and was perfectly content and quiet. Other than that, my children have stayed home for meglliah. We plan on bringing our older one when he is 6 or so.
I just don't think it is fair to everyone else to have little kids screaming when other people made a concerted effort to be there to get the mitzvah.
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PinkFridge
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Sun, Feb 28 2010, 10:36 pm
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My apologies for not reading through the nine pages. I went to late megillah readings till my youngest was about 6/7 and able to sit through it well. Seems like common sense to me. Though I did see something interesting this year. Someone came to shul last night with a few younger kids, dressed up, mbut didn't stay the whole time. Her kids were ok but I guess she left before there was a problem, and this way they got some of the excitement. (The oldest was a girl who might have been old enough and was probably either too old to stay with her father or maybe the logistics of his picking her up on time were daunting.)
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twokids
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Mon, Mar 01 2010, 12:19 am
I started out with only my oldest dd and about half way into the megilah my dh texted that he had to go to shul so I went out by the open doors to take care of my baby whom I didnt trust to be quiet although she was there were big boys who belonged inside with their fathers who made more noise than the other baby running around.
how sad
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mominisrael2
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Mon, Mar 01 2010, 1:30 pm
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I was definitely nervous about bringing my almost 6-year-old but she promised she would be quiet and brought a huge stack of books to keep her busy...was very pleasantly surprised that she was a perfect angel...
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Hashem_Yaazor
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Mon, Mar 01 2010, 1:50 pm
| Hashem_Yaazor wrote: | Last year I had the hava amina that this year I could bring my 4.5 year old who has extraordinary patience (he can sit quietly in shul with no issues for at least a half hour, which is about the length of a women's reading).
But I decided against it R"H time when he couldn't calm down during tekias shofar. He gets way too excited for things he's been anticipating and has a hard time calming down, and so even though he can sit without making a peep, getting him to that point may be hard.
Now I'm still unsure because last minute I have my sister as a guest for Purim (just found out 20 minutes ago!) and if she goes to first reading, maybe she can come with me to second, see if he sits down and stay with him and take him out as necessary. But I doubt I'll do it. It's just a thought I'm considering based on his specific personality. |
In the end, I went with my gut and left him home.
For bedtime story M"S I paraphrased the megillah and let the boys have at it with their graggers by Haman and they got a kick out of that.
In fact, my son told me it was his favorite part of Purim.
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Hashem_Yaazor
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Mon, Mar 01 2010, 1:53 pm
| Tova wrote: | My husband is also a ba'al koreh and leins megilla for the shul...but, he can't lein for me at home because we don't have a megilla! I would love to own a megilla but my husband said a mehudar one can be expensive.
| My husband prepared the leining but we also don't have a megillah. He said if it was ever necessary, he could borrow one, but he said he thinks I'd prefer listening to it b'hamon am vs being the only one listening to it, and he's right.
It means more to me hearing it with other people than just alone.
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NativeMom
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Mon, Mar 01 2010, 2:28 pm
I had my 3 yr old with me, he was fine but was a little overwhelmed with all the noise from the groggers. Towards the end he said, loud enough for people to hear, "I can't sit hear much longer!" Last year after we were done he yelled "is it finally over?" I don't know which was better  Other than that he sat quietly and wasn't disruptive at all.
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flowerpower
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Mon, Mar 01 2010, 2:29 pm
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I took them every year at night and by day I go before dh. This year bil was nice and read the megilla to everyone here.
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MommyZ
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Mon, Mar 01 2010, 2:32 pm
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I brought my kids at night and in the morning but turns out I didn't have to take them during the day since my DH lained for my sister who wasn't feeling well so we heard it twice during the day as well as at night.
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MommyZ
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Mon, Mar 01 2010, 2:32 pm
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I brought my kids at night and in the morning but turns out I didn't have to take them during the day since my DH lained for my sister who wasn't feeling well so we heard it twice during the day as well as at night.
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MommyZ
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Mon, Mar 01 2010, 2:33 pm
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I brought my kids at night and in the morning but turns out I didn't have to take them during the day since my DH lained for my sister who wasn't feeling well so we heard it twice during the day as well as at night.
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chaylizi
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Mon, Mar 01 2010, 2:34 pm
| Hashem_Yaazor wrote: | | Hashem_Yaazor wrote: | Last year I had the hava amina that this year I could bring my 4.5 year old who has extraordinary patience (he can sit quietly in shul with no issues for at least a half hour, which is about the length of a women's reading).
But I decided against it R"H time when he couldn't calm down during tekias shofar. He gets way too excited for things he's been anticipating and has a hard time calming down, and so even though he can sit without making a peep, getting him to that point may be hard.
Now I'm still unsure because last minute I have my sister as a guest for Purim (just found out 20 minutes ago!) and if she goes to first reading, maybe she can come with me to second, see if he sits down and stay with him and take him out as necessary. But I doubt I'll do it. It's just a thought I'm considering based on his specific personality. |
In the end, I went with my gut and left him home.
For bedtime story M"S I paraphrased the megillah and let the boys have at it with their graggers by Haman and they got a kick out of that.
In fact, my son told me it was his favorite part of Purim. |
that's adorable. I'm going to steal that idea. my kids were all sleeping at night. my dh went to hear first, so it was late for them by the time he came home to lein for me. daytime though, the kids stuck around & listened for the first couple hamans & then they went out to play. a 40 minute shul leining is not really for them.
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