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Shaindel Simes - Her husband Yehuda became a quadraplegic



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ChossidMom




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 11 2013, 3:13 pm
Today I was privileged to hear a lecture given by a special woman named Shaindel Simes from Ottawa whose life was turned upside down when her husband became a quadraplegic as a result of a car accident a few years ago. What strength! What fortitude! What amazing people they are. According to the article below, Chovas Halevavos by Rabbenu Bachyei ibn Paquda has been their lifeline. http://www.vosizneias.com/9676.....imes/
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amother


 

Post Wed, Dec 11 2013, 3:33 pm
I know her from elementary school. Truly a sad story.
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amother


 

Post Wed, Dec 11 2013, 3:37 pm
I know them from when they lived in Queens. They are AMAZING special people!!!!
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ChossidMom




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 11 2013, 3:40 pm
amother wrote:
I know her from elementary school. Truly a sad story.


It's not about "a sad story". It's about what they are doing with it and how inspiring they are!
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dee's mommy




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 11 2013, 7:11 pm
I know the family, and at this point it is a combination of finding them inspiring, and at the same time being friends.

If anyone is interested, here is Rabbi Simes' blog:

http://rollingrabbi.wordpress.com/

Chossidmom, do you think you can give over some of the lecture?
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SJcookie




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 11 2013, 8:28 pm
Wow, what amazing people. Thank you for sharing, Chossidmom!

This paragraph is just so moving. And true, of course.

"'We are not our bodies,” Rabbi Simes muses. “We are our neshamos. We’re not bodies that have a neshamah; we are a soul clothed in a body. I spent my adult years, before the accident, trying to internalize this concept. I knew and understood it quite deeply, but there’s an infinite number of levels of understanding. I think I’ve gotten a whole new level of knowing that I am not my body. Before my accident, hopefully I was doing ratzon Hashem, and now, after my accident, when my body is functioning differently, hopefully I’m still doing ratzon Hashem. So I, at my essence, didn’t change. The state of the body doesn’t define a person at all."
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hila




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 12 2013, 3:29 am
For anyone who can get to Efrat after Shabbat (19:30) - Rav Symes is speaking in Tiferet Avot Shul..

(he happens to be here for his niece's wedding and sheva brachot)
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 12 2013, 6:56 am
SJcookie wrote:
Wow, what amazing people. Thank you for sharing, Chossidmom!

This paragraph is just so moving. And true, of course.

"'We are not our bodies,” Rabbi Simes muses. “We are our neshamos. We’re not bodies that have a neshamah; we are a soul clothed in a body. I spent my adult years, before the accident, trying to internalize this concept. I knew and understood it quite deeply, but there’s an infinite number of levels of understanding. I think I’ve gotten a whole new level of knowing that I am not my body. Before my accident, hopefully I was doing ratzon Hashem, and now, after my accident, when my body is functioning differently, hopefully I’m still doing ratzon Hashem. So I, at my essence, didn’t change. The state of the body doesn’t define a person at all."


As a person who struggles with chronic illness, this really touches my heart. I have to remind myself of this every single day, or I'll be trapped in grieving for the person I was before I became ill. The yetzer hara really wants us to feel useless if we can't "do" things, and society says you're a drain on resources if you're not generating tons of money. Most days, Torah is the only thing that keeps my head above water.
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amother


 

Post Thu, Dec 12 2013, 7:59 am
I know Sheindel and her family. I grew up with them and davened in the same shul as them.

It is such a sad sad story. My hashem give them strength to go on.
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m in Israel




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 12 2013, 8:52 am
I also know the Simes family personally, and they are truly inspiring and wonderful people.
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 12 2013, 9:37 am
I think it's understandable for anyone to say it's sad. But at this point the family's passed that stage (and it's understandable if they revisit occasionally) and that's where the uplifting comes in.
There are other people whose stories have been told of other challenges, I don't want to hijack the thread by referring to them, and yes, reading about them, the good cheer outweighs the pain.
I've heard this ascribed to a number of people, an understanding of the words in Tehillim 30: chayim b'Rtzono. Life is according to His will. It's a matter of coming to terms with the fact that we have life according to His terms, and we are credited for what we do under those circumstances.
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dee's mommy




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 12 2013, 2:14 pm
PinkFridge wrote:
I think it's understandable for anyone to say it's sad. But at this point the family's passed that stage (and it's understandable if they revisit occasionally) and that's where the uplifting comes in.
There are other people whose stories have been told of other challenges, I don't want to hijack the thread .

\
This post in Rabbi Simes' blog is an example of this: http://rollingrabbi.wordpress......hour/
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ChossidMom




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 12 2013, 2:34 pm
She talked about how her life changed drastically. How they used to have many Shabbos guests and a very lively Shabbos table and how for months she couldn't even make a chicken soup because she simply did not have the time.
She talked about how they are a family that focuses alot on being mekadesh Shem Shamayim. And how they were able to do just that in the hospital and rehab where he was for 9 months. These places had never really seen orthodox Jews before.
She talked about Hashem's compassion during the years since the accident. She mentioned that she suddenly realized that in 3 1/2 years her car didn't need to go the garage once! And not one of her 9 (ka"h) kids got sick in all that time!
She discussed how shortly before their trip to Israel her husband was able to move a finger on one hand and how that was so exciting because it opens up new possibilities for him, since when a person can move their fingers they can pick something up between thumb and forefinger!
She said that they never made a Seudas Hoda'a because their rav said to only make one when the entire rehab procedure is at an end (if he can't make more progress) and that B"H she is so happy that she CAN'T make one yet!

She told about how at one point she got tired of it all and said to herself "Hey, I didn't sign up for this!" and that shortly thereafter she heard a shiur where the rebbetzin discussed how every neshama - before it comes down to earth - is shown what hardships and nisyonot it will have to undergo in this life and it says "Yes!". And it changed her life because she realized that she DID, in essence, sign up for this. And that was the point where she decided to look at this as a mission as opposed to a hardship.

Wow.

All in all, it was very strengthening and inspiring and I hope Hashem gives them loads of strength to keep up the good work they do and to keep lighting the way for others. The rest of us need to learn how to cope with adversity. One never knows when life can do a 180 degree turn.
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Shana_H




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 12 2013, 2:35 pm
I've officially run out of tissues! What a wonderful Couple! What a touching "story"! What incredible children!
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m in Israel




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 13 2013, 1:30 am
And of course everyone should have Rabbi Simes in mind in their tefilos for continued recovery iyh:

R' Yehuda Pinchos ben Osna
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ValleyMom




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 13 2013, 1:44 am
These people are truly inspiring.
Thank you to whoever posted this!
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amother
Indigo


 

Post Wed, Feb 08 2017, 7:38 pm
BDE Sad
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Wed, Feb 15 2017, 8:27 am
I can't believe it.. truly special man and family. May Hashem bless them all.
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amother
Seagreen


 

Post Wed, Feb 15 2017, 9:08 am
I know them grew up in Queens and davened in the same shul and went to school with her.
An unbelievable person and family.
We should all learn from them.
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amother
Pink


 

Post Fri, Feb 17 2017, 6:42 am
So sad, bde. Tragic.
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