Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Parenting our children
Where do babies come from?
1  2  Next



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

m+m




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 17 2014, 7:25 am
How do you answer this question when your children ask?
Back to top

Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 17 2014, 7:28 am
Hashem puts them in the belly of a mommy when it's the right time.

My dh also explained sacks and placentas as he's very into that Wink
Back to top

MaBelleVie




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 17 2014, 7:42 am
Depends on the age of the child.
Back to top

m+m




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 17 2014, 7:53 am
MaBelleVie wrote:
Depends on the age of the child.


About 7-8 yr old.

How about how babies come out? I think that's harder for kids to understand/harder to explain.
Back to top

DrMom




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 17 2014, 8:03 am
Esti's Mom wrote:
About 7-8 yr old.

How about how babies come out? I think that's harder for kids to understand/harder to explain.

I just told my children that when the baby is ready to come out, it comes out through a special passageway in the ima's body. They asked me where it was and I told them it is near the place where urine comes out, but it is a separate passageway unconnected to the sac that holds urine in our bodies.

They were surprised because they assumed it came out the bellybutton.
Back to top

potatoes




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 17 2014, 8:09 am
The truth: it is a miracle! Hashem makes a special place for the baby to come out from, only when the baby is ready.
As a kid, I used to think its from the stomach also. Nothing wrong with that.
Back to top

m+m




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 17 2014, 6:07 pm
potatoes wrote:
The truth: it is a miracle! Hashem makes a special place for the baby to come out from, only when the baby is ready.
As a kid, I used to think its from the stomach also. Nothing wrong with that.


There's nothing wrong with thinking baby comes out of a belly button or stomach, but if your DC asked you would you be ok lying to them and telling that to them?
Back to top

Davida




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 17 2014, 6:32 pm
I'm not sure what I would do with a boy but I would tell a 7 year old girl where babies come out from. After all, it will happen to her one day too and she could conceptualize. Sometime though, kids ask but they're not yet interested in hearing. You have to gauge if and how much answers they need. However if the kid I really interested, do not make up straight up lies and show your kids that you want to answer questions. If they realize you'e "making u" stories, they won't come to you in the future and their education will take place at recess and not from you.
Back to top

groisamomma




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 17 2014, 6:41 pm
Why would you lie? My kids asked me this last week (again, they seem to forget they asked the same thing last year), and I said when baby's ready it comes out of a place Hashem made for that. DD asked "down there?" and I said yes. Last year same DD asked what baby starts from so I told her she (and every healthy girl) is born with two peanut-size ovaries (don't remember if I used the word or not) with all the babies they can ever have in there...I threw in that boys don't have that so that's why they don't carry a baby. I realized later that maybe it wasn't perfectly and scientifically so accurate but she was happy so I was happy. We have time when they get older for more details; no reason a little kid has to be overthinking this unless the mother makes a bigger deal than necessary. Don't overthink it so much.
Back to top

Tova




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 17 2014, 7:16 pm
We spoke about this a lot when I was pregnant with my baby. My older kids were 5 and 6. In response to their questions, I said that "at the right time, Hashem makes the baby start growing in the Mommy's tummy" (I don't think of "tummy" as inaccurate as we don't use it here to mean stomach) and "when its time for the baby to be born Hashem makes a special part of the Mommy's body open - it's in a place that's not tznius so I can't show you - and that's where the baby comes out." My children were very happy with these explanations. I am extremely open with my kids, there is nothing they ask that I won't answer.
Back to top

busydev




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Feb 17 2014, 7:34 pm
what my mother tells younger kids (and I plan to do the same)
at the right time Hashem opens a special hole for the baby to come out. if they ask where it is
in a private place on mommy.
all true and enough to tide over till they get bigger or ask more. and then the answers are still true but not more specific then needed at the time
Back to top

amother


 

Post Tue, Feb 18 2014, 11:07 am
I have no problem being clear with my girls (9 & 10) on how babies come out.
It's how they get in that I tend to be evasive.
I do not want my kids getting misinformation but I also am not comfortable describing the act yet.
They understand that the babies are part of mothers and part of fathers but can't for the life of them figure out how the fathers' DNA gets in there.
I really thought they'd figure it out by now.
Anonymous because <I'm a coward>. Soon, soon I'll give them a book.
Back to top

Rutabaga




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 18 2014, 11:16 am
DD was born via c-section. When she was 3ish, she asked that question and I showed her the scar. That made a lot of sense to her because she knew that a baby grows in a mommy's belly.

I know it was a cop-out, but I will tell her more accurate information if she asks again when she is older. And if she doesn't ask, I plan to have "The Talk" before she gets her period.
Back to top

gp2.0




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 18 2014, 11:17 am
Tova wrote:
I am extremely open with my kids, there is nothing they ask that I won't answer.


I feel the same way, but I'm wondering, what do you tell a little kid if they see a package of tampons or sanitary pads and ask what they are?
Back to top

smss




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 18 2014, 11:22 am
Rutabaga wrote:
DD was born via c-section. When she was 3ish, she asked that question and I showed her the scar. That made a lot of sense to her because she knew that a baby grows in a mommy's belly.

I know it was a cop-out, but I will tell her more accurate information if she asks again when she is older. And if she doesn't ask, I plan to have "The Talk" before she gets her period.


I think it's sort of a chaval for a kid's first answer to "how does the baby come out" to be "by a c-section." just my personal feeling.
Back to top

clowny




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 18 2014, 11:25 am
Whatever you decide to share with your children is up to you. But what's very important is never to lie to them, they will lose trust in you and might try to get their answers elsewhere.
Back to top

Chayalle




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 18 2014, 11:27 am
gp2.0 wrote:
I feel the same way, but I'm wondering, what do you tell a little kid if they see a package of tampons or sanitary pads and ask what they are?


Don't ask that question. A friend told me that her son's friend found pads in his mother's closet and distributed them as stickers to all of his friends.

My DD has a habit of helping herself to items she finds interesting, and I recently found a tampon in her private stash. She is 5. She probably thought it was some kind of tissue on a string.

ETA: Up to a certain age - probably 10 or so - I imagined that a mother's stomache opened up and the baby popped out, and then it closed up. I don't specifically remember what my mother told me, but quite honestly it doesn't bother me in the least. I don't feel that she lied to me in that respect. She just didn't give me information I didn't need yet.

When my girls are 10, I tell them about periods and that that's where babies come out of...and B"H they ask me questions, each at their own pace. (See thread about 15 year old. My DD asked me those questions when she was 12 (!), and I answered her. My next DD is 12 and hasn't asked yet, but when she does I will tell her. She's more spacey then her older sister, so I expect it to take her longer to get curious....)
Back to top

Aylat




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 18 2014, 11:36 am
gp2.0 wrote:
I feel the same way, but I'm wondering, what do you tell a little kid if they see a package of tampons or sanitary pads and ask what they are?


In the supermarket when I was in my ninth month, DD 8yrs old picked the packet of sanitary towels out of the trolley and called over to me, "Oh Mummy, are these the nappies for the new baby?!" Rolling Laughter

I was preoccupied with picking out apples, and said without looking, "Yes." (There was also a packet of nappies in the trolley.) When I turned around and saw what she was waving around I said, "No, those are the nappies."

DD: So what are these then. (still waving sanitary towels around)
Me: I'll tell you later.
DD, loudly: Tell me now.
Me: I'll tell you later, it's a private thing.

At home: When the baby is in the Mummy's tummy (she already knows roughly about uterus and amniotic sac) there needs to be lots of blood all around to give it what it needs and keep it comfortable. After the baby is born, the blood isn't needed anymore, so it comes out. These are kind of like Mummy nappies and they catch the blood so the underwear doesn't get dirty. (She already knows more or less where the baby comes out.)
Added when I realised she was alarmed and was imagining loads of blood pouring out: It doesn't come out that fast, it kind of drips out bit by bit for a while.

I thought this was a great introduction to the concept of periods that I will be explaining to her in a year or so beH.

ETA: When one of my younger DSs saw the packet of sanitary towels in my drawer and asked what it was I just told them it was a private Mummy thing. They were satisfied with that and didn't ask further.
Back to top

EmesOrNT




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 18 2014, 11:42 am
I think it's easier to answer girls, than boys. I tell my boys, ages 8 and 9 that when the baby is ready, the doctor helps it come out from where it comes out. And then I'm vague. I don't think my boys need to learn about vag*nas so young.
Back to top

Rutabaga




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Feb 18 2014, 12:29 pm
smss wrote:
I think it's sort of a chaval for a kid's first answer to "how does the baby come out" to be "by a c-section." just my personal feeling.


I wasn't so technical about it. I told DD that the doctors had taken her out of my belly and showed her the scar. It was the truth, just not the whole truth.
Back to top
Page 1 of 2 1  2  Next Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Parenting our children

Related Topics Replies Last Post
Do babies keep spitting up after starting food?
by amother
2 Yesterday at 9:02 pm View last post
Please don't bring babies or young children to megillah
by dena613
166 Mon, Mar 25 2024, 2:43 pm View last post
Idea for kids to dress up as together- teens to babies!
by amother
8 Tue, Feb 20 2024, 3:16 am View last post
Sleep schedule babies
by amother
59 Wed, Feb 14 2024, 4:01 pm View last post
Do you alter your babies/toddlers clothes?
by amother
31 Tue, Feb 13 2024, 3:37 pm View last post