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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette
Upstairs neighbors killing each other. HELP!!
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amother


 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 9:51 pm
We recently moved into a apartment and the ppl who live right on top of us are Russian. They seem like nice ppl but every night we hear SHOUTING to the point that I feel the police need to be there. (not just some screaming we all know of) We hear kids crying and we are pretty sure we hear beating. My husband says we should mind our own business but #1 I feel it's my responsibility to the kids and #2 it makes me sooooooooooooooo nervous and anxious. What is the right thing to do
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MaBelleVie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 9:52 pm
Call the police! They don't have to know who called. Let the police determine whether anyone is in real danger.
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Happy18




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 9:57 pm
Call the police!!!!!!!!!!!
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amother


 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 9:58 pm
I was thinking of calling the police but when they get here everything is going to look all fine and what will it accomplish? They are not going to act like that in front of the cops.
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amother


 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 10:03 pm
Tell the police to listen outside their door for awhile before going in.
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MaBelleVie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 10:04 pm
You have no idea what the cops will find when they get there. You never know what the couple will say.
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rising hero




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 10:06 pm
Do you have other neighbors that can enlighten you of the situation? Maybe they know something, or tried to do something about it too.
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amother


 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 10:10 pm
I am here 4 months so I don't really know the other neighbors yet but I was thinking of maybe calling the community Rav.
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mummiedearest




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 10:20 pm
call the cops. I've done it. it's the right thing to do.
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strawberry cola




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 11:10 pm
calling the Rav for instructions is the right thing to do
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MaBelleVie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 11:12 pm
strawberry cola wrote:
calling the Rav for instructions is the right thing to do


Please explain how a rav can stop people from spousal/child abuse. Thanks.
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bubbebia




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Mar 04 2014, 11:27 pm
If children are possibly being harmed you need to call the cops. If there is the possibility that anyone is being harmed you need to call the cops. Who knows whose life you may be saving.
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ElTam




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 05 2014, 5:09 pm
Call the police. If you saw someone being beaten, would you call your rav to ask what to do? Why would you ask if you just hear someone being beaten?
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gittelchana




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 05 2014, 7:14 pm
MaBelleVie wrote:
Call the police! They don't have to know who called. Let the police determine whether anyone is in real danger.


I second that
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 05 2014, 7:37 pm
wonder if anybody is dead by now ...

what if it were you being beat up or one of your kids ???

I think you'd want someone to butt in & save your life !!!
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justcallmeima




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 05 2014, 7:44 pm
You are halachikally required to call the police if you hear someone being beaten.
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amother


 

Post Wed, Mar 05 2014, 7:54 pm
Also be mindful that in the Russian culture screaming/shouting is somewhat of the norm. If you're sure it's more angry and abusive than just a passionate (heated) conversation - call the police. Worry about the repercussions later.
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amother


 

Post Wed, Mar 05 2014, 9:48 pm
OP here. I have put a lot of thought into this. I am still not sure what the correct decision is. I think I will approach the principal of their daughters school and let her do whatever investigation is needed. Generally children won't approach an adult to admit the truth but if they are approached by the adult, chances are they will let it out.
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harriet




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 05 2014, 9:58 pm
amother wrote:
OP here. I have put a lot of thought into this. I am still not sure what the correct decision is. I think I will approach the principal of their daughters school and let her do whatever investigation is needed. Generally children won't approach an adult to admit the truth but if they are approached by the adult, chances are they will let it out.


I would not place bets on these kids saying the truth
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notshanarishona




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Mar 05 2014, 10:19 pm
I wouldnt call the police unless u r 100% sure of what is going on. I would try to verify first. in an apartment, many noises sound different than what they really are . as another poster said different cultures r more into screaming so that it in itself doesnt prove abuse.
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