blueberries
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 Thu, Jul 03 2014, 9:48 am
Survive a summer day with your kids…and be happy about it, too ;o)
School’s out for the summer and, for most kids, it has been out for at least a few weeks now. No matter your family situation (whether you are a stay at home parent, work from home, or work outside the home), summer time can have its challenges.
When siblings spend more time together, they can develop frustrating behaviors like nagging at each other, teaming up against mom or dad (by distracting each other from doing chores or whatever else they are being told to do), not getting things done, and making more messes around the house.
I say these somewhat (or totally) irritating issues with love for my kids and compassion for all kids.
Following are some tips on how to get through a day with your kids not only in a way that ends the day with the thought “Thank goodness! We all survived.” but also with true happiness and fulfillment.
Live in the moment
One of the most important ways to enjoy the summer (or anytime) is to live in the moment. This means to focus on what is happening in the now and resisting any tendency to worry about the past, the future, or your possibly never-ending to-do list.
Have patience
Whether you are with your kids all day or just part of the day, having patience will make things so much easier when dealing with kids. To have patience, take deep breaths, look at the positive, and provide genuine consideration, understanding, and kindness to your kids.
Take care of yourself
It is much more difficult to take care of anyone else if you don’t take care of yourself. Yes, parents have to take care of their kids regardless of how they are taking care of themselves, but to make things easier on you, prioritize self-care. Do things such as stay well-rested, stay hydrated, eat healthy foods, and balance the many roles you might have (housekeeper, mother, father, wife, husband, employee, an individual, etc.).
Have a plan
It is helpful to write out a schedule or a plan for what you would like to accomplish on a weekly or daily basis, whatever suits your personality. For instance, either the night before or in the morning write down the things you have to and/or would like to get done. That includes things that you have planned for your children to do, as well (including chores, activities, and play time).
Have realistic expectations for yourself and others
Some people tend to want to get way more accomplished than is reasonably possible in any given 24 hour period of time. Others tend to get through their day without setting up clear goals. Both approaches are understandable. However, to get through a summer’s day with your kids, it’s helpful to not expect too much but to also hold yourself and your kids to a certain standard that will support your family’s overall well-being and functioning. Expectations can lead to disappointment but reasonable expectations that are met most of the time can lead to greater happiness.
Provide appropriate consequences and rewards
Remain in a positive state of mind as much as you can despite what your kids do. Provide consequences to misbehavior but also provide rewards for positive behavior. Rewards can include simply recognizing the good deed by giving praise, spending time with each other, or can be a special treat of some sort.
Allow free play
Free play is good for the well-being of kids and also adults. Don’t structure your kids’ or your own time too much. Free play time allows kids to express themselves, to learn, to gain skills, to work on interacting with others, and much more. Give yourself free time, as well. Don’t feel guilty about pursuing leisurely activities even if your dishes aren’t done yet (just get back to your dishes at another time).
Play with your kids
Playing can be rejuvenating and can induce feelings of happiness in adults and kids. The parent-child relationship can also greatly benefit from having play time together. This will ultimately make your summer days much more peaceful and happier, as well.
http://pro.psychcentral.com/ch.....it-o/
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