dd wants to get instragram

4Sisters

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 6:22 am

My dd is entering 6th grade and returned from sleepover camp wanting to get an instragram account (so I'm assuming some of her friends from camp have). I don't know anything about instagram. A friend told me that people comment on pictures you post. Can anyone comment or only those you have "friended"? What else should I know about it?! I would, of course, also sign up to watch what's going on.

She has an email account that every message goes through my account. No other social media.

Thank you!

FranticFrummie

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 7:11 am

I'm in the same boat. What is it about that age? DD has an email account and a YouTube channel for her American Girl dollhouse tutorials. Now she wants to start blogging, maybe have a message board, FaceBook, and she really, REALLY wants a smartphone.

I am SO not ready for this. IMHO, that is just way too much exposure to strangers, and way too much screen time. She needs to be playing with friends in real life, not sitting on the computer all day.

*** Of course, I can sit all day and play on Imamother, because I'm a grownup. That's why!***

rachel91

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 7:29 am

Instagram is basically all about pictures.
People can follow your account. If your account is locked, no one will be able to see your pictures, only if they request to follow you, and you accept.
Your followers will be able to like and comment on your pictures.
If your account isn't locked, anyone will be able to see, like and comment on your pictures.

rachel91

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 7:50 am

Then there are the hashtags.
If your account isn't locked and you write for example #food under your picture, your picture will be displayed with all other pictures, who have the #food.
That way more people see your pictures, you will evtl. get more likes, followers etc.

This is basically it, I just tried to explain the way it works, I don't have any advice if you should allow it or not.

skymile

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 10:47 am

rachel you totally skipped over what SHE would be exposed to. she can see every single user that is not private. so if she hashtags for example #bestgiftever and then she clicks into it or whatever, you would see every single user that isn't private that also hashtagged that. imagine if she would post #party or #drinks or anything innocent like that (maybe she posts her birthday party pics or a sleepover or whatever)- believe me- there are some inapporpiate things you don't want her seeing. plus she can follow anyone. girls, boys, men, any shmutz, men pretending to be girls, bochurim pretending to be girls, etc... the list goes on and on.
I don;t think it's a good idea.

dancingqueen

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 11:08 am

Not advising if you should let her join but I will say even if she doesn't join she can see many of the public Instagram profiles anyway.

My understanding is that the kids your dds age are on Instagram- Facebook isn't cool because all their moms are on it Cool

MamaBear

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 11:13 am

I'm usually pretty laid back but Instagram is actually a really easy way for kids to see a lot of inappropriate pictures. Lots of public unfiltered pictures of basically everything and anything.

6th grade is too young for that kind of freedom, imo.

little_mage

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 11:54 am

If she's entering sixth grade, I assume she's only 11? From the instagram website:

Quote:

You must be at least 13 years old to use the Service.

That gives you a reason to refuse it for a least another couple of years, although it might make it harder to forbid once she turns 13.

As a disclaimer, I should say that I know absolutely nothing about it other then what I just saw from looking at their site briefly. It also seems to be mainly set up for mobile users, so if she doesn't have a smartphone, I'm not sure if she can even use it.

rachel91

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 12:02 pm

skymile wrote:

l'o

I wrote in my post, that I'm just explaining to op how instagram works, so she should have a better insight. I thought it was obvious from my explanation, that pictures of open profiles are visible to everyone and hashtags aswell.

momlove

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 10:30 pm

I definitely agree that instagram I safer than facebook (I have instagram but not facebook or any other social media) because its not so much used for friending and communicating as much as its just for posting pictures to keep friends/family/followers up to date, or, like many businesses use it (including myself), for advertising. id like to hear if anyone thinks differently.

amother

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 10:40 pm

Except that especially with pre-teens and teens, there's a lot of KIK and snapchat going on thru instragram. There is much easier access to inappropriate pics and VIDEOS (recent addition) from other public posters and the security settings even to make it "private" and just to people you accept aren't so clear and if someone you have allowed to follow you "likes" one of your pictures, then anyone who follows them can see the picture that they liked, even if your profile is private. Also, there's a lot of people commenting, and as with social media in general, people are more likely to say hurtful things when it's not talking person to person. Instagram encourages the whole "selfie" thing and a one-upsmanship on who can take the weirdest picture. I certainly don't think it's a place for anyone under 21. I also think the whole culture of "I have more "likes" than you" on a picture or the sadness of "how come no one "liked" my picture" is just not good for pre-teens and teens.

Anon only b/c I was *just* telling someone this.

momlove

Wed, Jul 23 2014, 10:52 pm

[quote="amother"]Except that especially with pre-teens and teens, there's a lot of KIK and snapchat going on thru instragram. There is much easier access to inappropriate pics and VIDEOS (recent addition) from other public posters and the security settings even to make it "private" and just to people you accept aren't so clear and if someone you have allowed to follow you "likes" one of your pictures, then anyone who follows them can see the picture that they liked, even if your profile is private. Also, there's a lot of people commenting, and as with social media in general, people are more likely to say hurtful things when it's not talking person to person. Instagram encourages the whole "selfie" thing and a one-upsmanship on who can take the weirdest picture. I certainly don't think it's a place for anyone under 21. I also think the whole culture of "I have more "likes" than you" on a picture or the sadness of "how come no one "liked" my picture" is just not good for pre-teens and teens.
Anon only b/c I was *just* telling someone this

Absolutely, I dont think social media altogether is a place for children, and imho, for adult singles either. I use extreme caution, and use it for advertising purposes only. Hashem yishmoreinu mikal rah.

Kugglegirl

Thu, Jul 24 2014, 1:22 am

I also nixed instagram for my young teens. It seemed like too easy for them to end up w. unknown "followers" & exposure to inappropriate things, even if they were not looking for it.

Told them they need to be at least 16 before I let them have any social media accounts. Agreed there is some obsessiveness with the "likes."

(& maybe by then will figure something else out....)

They have e-mail & ipad/ipod messaging accounts where they can share photos w. friends & "chat" or "text." Am hoping this staves off the need for the social media accounts. (I check their messages from time to time. Mostly kid stuff, silly pictures & some complaining about how mean mommy is.)

The interest for my kids was generated by one kid who's family has always allowed things that we don't do, so it was no surprise to them that I said no, after investigating.

amother

Thu, Jul 24 2014, 1:27 am

amother wrote:

Just commenting on this in case someone gets misinformation from here. A private account is totally private, noone can see the pics even if someone they follow "liked" your pic. Those pics are not on the screen.