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Which would upset you more- child off derech or ser. illness
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Which of the two would be more painful?
A child off the derech  
 22%  [ 11 ]
A child who gets seriously ill  
 77%  [ 37 ]
Total Votes : 48



amother


 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 8:30 am
Which of the two would be more painful? A child off the derech (there's always the chance that they'll rebound) or a child who gets seriously ill (with a possibly fatal illness, but there's always a chance of recovery)?
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mimivan




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 8:32 am
This is such a sad thread!!! I'm sorry, I don't like it at all!
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Seraph




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 9:45 am
A serious illness. Because so long as a person is alive, there's always the chance of doing teshuva. Life is a VERY special thing.
Anyone who would be more upset with a child going off the derech than being gravely ill ... I have a very hard time understanding, in my very humble opinion.


Last edited by Seraph on Wed, May 09 2007, 10:10 am; edited 1 time in total
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shalhevet




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 10:04 am
breslov wrote:
A serious illness. Because so long as a person is alive, there's always the chance of doing teshuva. Life is a VERY special thing.
Anyone who would be more upset with a child going off the derech than being gravely ill has some serious mental issues, in my very humble opinion.


I guess I have some serious mental issues then. What

What's worse? For a person to lose out in this world? Or in the next?

I can't remember where it's from, but my husband once read from a sefer (maybe the Chayye Adam, but I don't remember) that when he was young, Jewish mothers would rather have seen their children killed al kidush hashem rather than they sin.
What about in the Shoah when Jewish parents let their children be killed, rather than risk them being brought up as non jews? (What a terrible dilema, who can possibly say what was right under such circumstances?)

May Hashem never give us either of these terrible tests.
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su7kids




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 10:04 am
I'm sorry, but I'm not capable of answering the poll. I wouldn't want either, and partially have one.

I can't really get my mind around either.
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Seraph




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 10:09 am
shalhevet wrote:
breslov wrote:
A serious illness. Because so long as a person is alive, there's always the chance of doing teshuva. Life is a VERY special thing.
Anyone who would be more upset with a child going off the derech than being gravely ill has some serious mental issues, in my very humble opinion.


I guess I have some serious mental issues then. What

What's worse? For a person to lose out in this world? Or in the next?

I can't remember where it's from, but my husband once read from a sefer (maybe the Chayye Adam, but I don't remember) that when he was young, Jewish mothers would rather have seen their children killed al kidush hashem rather than they sin.
What about in the Shoah when Jewish parents let their children be killed, rather than risk them being brought up as non jews? (What a terrible dilema, who can possibly say what was right under such circumstances?)

May Hashem never give us either of these terrible tests.


I read stuff that great rabbanim said (don't ask me who) that the most important thing in this world is life.
And I'm sorry- I spoke too harshly- guess I'll edit my original post.
Dying al kidush hashem is much different than having a serious illness... I don;t think someone is guaranteed gan eden for having a serious illness...
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daisy




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 10:13 am
Why do we need to speculate about such things? I think we need to focus on reality, instead of spending time and emotional resources worrying about theoretical terrible things like this.
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happymom




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 10:13 am
I cant believe this poll.......!!!!!
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 10:15 am
and what if you have both ... like me?!?!
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amother


 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 10:23 am
OP here.
The reason I wonder about it is when one is faced with either situation, people console the suffering parent, with describing the other scenario, saying it could be the other, which is worse.
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shwartzcop




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 10:53 am
Sorry green to hear this!!!! Hashem should help you and all these things shouldnt enter your door anymore!!!!!!but I agree with minivan....this poll is unbeleivable!!!!!and I also agree with shalhevet!!!!
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mimivan




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 10:57 am
Thanks Op for giving us the reason you brought this up..I feel better about it..
But life is hard enough without having to decide on these topics...We all have these thoughts like about what we would do in terrible, hypothetical situations, but I think the problem with turning it into a thread is that the question really challenges people's core values and disagreements are bound to be personal.

Tracht gut v' zeint gut--think good and it will be good--is an important chassidic precept. I don't think that it's sticking one's head in the sand to avoid such hypothetical questions.
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shwartzcop




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 11:10 am
lol
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Crayon210




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 11:26 am
Wow. This is like that game "Would you rather?":

Would you rather sit on rusty nails for three days or have cockroaches eat your intestines by crawling through your nose?
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rainbow baby




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 11:31 am
To any parent who is suffering with either scenario it is very bad for them. As I have said again and again unless you have been in these situations you cannot say which is worse. They are both terrible situations. But what I do know is that Hashem only gives you what you can cope with. He is the boss of the world, but what we can do is be good people, help each other out, etc... and the most important thing is to daven to Hashem. To also Daven to Hashem that no one has to suffer is this way, ever and that Moshiach comes NOW!!!!
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chocolate moose




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 11:37 am
It makes ya think, dosn't it!
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shwartzcop




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 12:04 pm
Crayon....you cracked me up!!!!!I was laughing loud.....lol......and u jewishmamathebest ur so right I agree...
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Raisin




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 2:09 pm
Crayon210 wrote:
Wow. This is like that game "Would you rather?":

Would you rather sit on rusty nails for three days or have cockroaches eat your intestines by crawling through your nose?


Or on a more serious note: If you could only save one child's life, which would it be?

That scenario can just give you nightmares...

I really don't like these questions, if they do ch'v come up we will have to deal with them, but for now all we can do is make sure our kids are healthy both bruchnius and bgashmius.

Although Shalhevet's response was interesting, this is not the choice right now.
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happyone




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 2:10 pm
In the world we live in, the chesed and support that's out there for serious illness is unreal - mi k'amcha yisroel! However, when a family is dealing with R'l a child off the derech it's a suffering that many do not understand, and cannot offer consolation, support and encouragement like illness. People are less understanding and quick to judge and blame parents, unfortunately. However, with illness there's no judging and blame, only compassion and hopefully help and understanding.

Hashem should help we should be spared from all suffering!
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, May 09 2007, 2:19 pm
happyone wrote:


Hashem should help we should be spared from all suffering!


Amen!!!
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