Gift for DIL | Imamother

cbg

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 6:46 am

My new DIL's birthday is coming up. She's turning 20. I don't know what to get her. She got many gifts from us right before the wedding, before Pesach. The last time (and first time I came to their home) I got her a perfume, not an expensive one, but nice. She asked how I knew that was her favorite.

Now I don't know what to get her. I want the gift to be something for her, not the house. Want to spend no more than $100, less if possible. I want to give her something more personal than a gift card.

amother

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 7:12 am

How about some pretty jewelry she can wear every day, rather than fancy kallah jewelry?

My in-laws have bought me earrings, scarves, and other nice accessory pieces over the years. Now that we're comfortable together, they like to sponsor something I want/need rather than guess. They've sponsored a new everyday winter coat and maternity clothing and prescription sunglasses and a new washing machine after Hurricane Sandy.

cfriedman2

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 8:09 am

Check out coach outlet. U can get some nice bags for abt $100. My mom just bought a duffle for my new sil who just turned 21 and she loves it. Was abt $75 I think. I've gotten wristlets and coach picture key chains from my mil also. Now my mil offers to "sponsor" something I need/want bc she knows my tastes are a lil picky and she wants to get me something I want and like.

21young

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 8:13 am

Everyday watch or evening bag are always nice, but they're both over $100.
Costume jewelry, or trendy everyday jewelry is nice, but you have to be very clear that she can exchange, or it might be better to give her a gift card to the store. (I know you don't want to give a gift card but it could avoid an uncomfortable situation.)
Something nice for her house/apartment - vase, tray, etc.

mha3484

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 8:35 am

How about some type of experience? You could go together or she could go with a friend. A spa, a show, paint your own pottery, a museum whatever she would like but a fun outing can be just as nice as a thing.

ariellabella

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 8:38 am

mha3484 wrote:

I love this idea, and I just want to say how thoughtful it is of you to think of getting her something for her instead of for the kitchen/household.

HonesttoGod

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 10:43 am

I like the idea of costume jewelry. My mil has bought me several kinds over the years. Necklaces, earrings, watch and a ring.
Recently she gave me a voucher to my favorite accessory store which was great (she asked dh what I want and he said this) because I get to choose my own thing.

Other ideas is a gift set of the perfume you bought last time (the body wash, body cream and mini pocket book size perfume).
Or a selection of mini perfumes (versace, chanel etc).

Other things my mil has bought me are
fancy wig stand for my dresser
jewelry box (huge wooden one)
Recipe books

Some other random ideas:
Mirror tray for dresser
Vase
Nice tray for her candlesticks
spa voucher (although dh claims that is for a husband to buy his wife, fine with me lol).

amother

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 11:12 am

Just a little warning here. You mentioned that you have already bought her many gifts. If you give so many gifts (and especially expensive ones) in the beginning of marriage then she will come to expect it from now on. If your financial situation wont allow giving all children so many gifts for many years to come then dont get into that pattern where they may resent it if you suddenly stop.

HonesttoGod

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 12:28 pm

amother wrote:

Any normal person will understand if the gifts are not always $100 things.

Personally when we were engaged my mil bought me some real nice things and promised us a lot of money to help us start life. Right around the time we got married they lost a lot of money and couldn't give us the money they promised.
We were and still are fine with it. Her gifts have ranged from $10 necklaces to $75 jewelry boxes and $90 perfumes. I appreciate every gift the same way. She spent time and money to choose something for me.

Anyone who cannot appreciate that doesn't deserve any time or money put into them.

Delores

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 1:32 pm

amother wrote:

She wants to get her DIL a gift and you are warning her of the "dangers"? What is wrong with you????
Why are you anonymous?
To the OP I think it is wonderful of you to be giving her a gift, the beginning of a warm, healthy relationship with your new DIL.

amother

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 1:55 pm

My MIL always sends a nice card and a check for birthdays ($100). When she comes to visit or for other random times she'll give smaller stuff like a cookbook, book, pretty dish or tray, bencher holder, etc... but the birthday gifts are always a check. I count on it at this point and always get something nice for !ME! for my birthday with it.

cbg

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 3:41 pm

Delores wrote:

Let me clarify. I have only 1 son. Our tradition is to do a Swenie (not sure how to spell it) where we give lots of gifts to the new bride. We did it on the conservative side.

Many of the gifts mentioned where given at that time. I want to reserve jewelry for her DH, my son, to give to her. Things like jewelry box, vanity tray, coach purse and wallet, perfume, we gave her at that time, which was not too long ago.

She is expecting. Is it bad form to get her a nice diaper bag, or does something like that have to wait till after the baby is born. I consider a stylish diaper bag to be more for the mom than for the baby.

cbg

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 3:44 pm

amother wrote:

I know her. If I give her money she'll spend it on groceries. I want to give HER something.

Frumdoc

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 5:01 pm

A gift card for a manicure or beauty treatment? Or matching bath stuff for her favorite perfume is always appreciated.

A book or Amazon gift card if she is the type is not so personal but my most valued gift, as I can eke out spending it over a few weeks or longer with cheap books. Or a really lovely house plant.

Or take them out for a meal at a nice restaurant, if it isn't too expensive.

esther malka

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 5:02 pm

What about a nice scarf or pair of leather gloves, winter is coming... Nordstrom should have in that price range and they wrap it pretty.
So nice of you btw, so thoughtful

mummiedearest

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 5:47 pm

cbg wrote:

I would give that once the baby is born. are you close enough with her to go out for a spa day together? that's a great treat for a pregnant woman, and it's an opportunity for you two to bond.

MadameX

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 6:00 pm

I loved it when my MIL bought be beauty products to use at home

Mud masks
Special hand cream
Ahava products
etc.

All of those at home spa products to make us women feel pampered whenever we want Smile

eschaya

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 6:30 pm

Gift card for massage (or other relaxing experience) or mani/pedi etc.
Tickets for her and husband to go to show/museum/exhibit.
Prepaid meal at nice restaurant for her and dh.
Starbucks card (or similar).
Hotel voucher.
Ask your son if there are any particular stores she likes and get her a credit there.

d l

Tue, Aug 26 2014, 6:37 pm

Really thoughtful of you!

Whatever you give, make sure there is a gift reciept so she can exchange or return- even though you want to get her something she will love, it is hard to know, especially when she is new in the fam, what she will really like.

I really like the jewlery suggestion. scarf or sweater for the winter is also nice. I personally like cookbooks or novels, or a subscription to a magazine- but not everybody does.

A gift card to go out to dinner with her husband also sounds nice. Or a gift card to a maternity store. Or a gift card for a manicure or prenatal massage if she like massages.

I deff wouldn't buy a baby gift now.

Whatever you get, it really is so nice of you to remember her special day and give her a gift for it.