Getting to me. | Imamother

staten islander

Wed, Oct 08 2014, 9:09 am

I have a friend who does this.She has no problem going to others, but doesn't reciprocate because "she is not as good a cook or hostess". In today's world, with the proliferation of takeout available, that's a cop out and I do feel used sometimes.Better to invite someone who hosted you to a simple meal then not at all

Barbara

Wed, Oct 08 2014, 9:42 am

staten islander wrote:

It took me a long time to get over that. Oh, who am I kidding. I'm not over it. I always felt "inferior" -- like my food wasn't nearly as good as everyone else's. My place wasn't as clean. And since my dining room is rather small, I couldn't invite as many people.

It's actually my husband who figured it out for me. Most of our friends have full time help. I'd make a joke about me being the full time help, but since I work outside the home, I'm at best part time help.

Anyway, since I still accept more invitations than I give, I've been asking people, "really, tell me what I can bring to help you." And I've been asked to bring roasts and chicken and a vegetable dishes to feed 20. And I do it.

saw50st8

Wed, Oct 08 2014, 11:46 am

Barbara wrote:

A local friend schooled me on doing less and inviting more. People don't really come for the food, they come for the company. I like having company so I've outsourced a few things:

1) Challah. We love home made challah but even with a mixer, I find it time consuming. There are quite a few steps and even though none take a long time, I find it just keeps going and going...at $4/loaf, it's not worth my time.

2) No more appetizers. Most people who come have young kids, who don't really want to eat the appetizer. Appetizers tend to be fancier and take more time. We go straight to the meal.

3) No patchke foods. I do roasts or roast chicken vs schnitzel. If it takes too many steps, it's gone.

4) We have a formula for what we do cook - 1 meat dish, 1 chicken dish, 1 green salad, 1 hot vegetable dish and 1 starchy dish

5) Dessert is fruit and either something I buy or easy to make.

With rare exception, I also don't have company for both the night and day meals.

saw50st8

Wed, Oct 08 2014, 1:18 pm

L25 wrote:

saw50st8- you ALWAYS serve meat?

Unless I'm having vegetarians. We sometimes do cholent, meat balls, meat roll, meat loaf, brisket, corned beef or whatever is on sale. It's pretty standard in my community. We don't *have* to, but I generally do. I don't make enormous portions of meat, so it's not so pricey.

If we have vegetarians, then I'll do a chicken dish and vegetarian proteins (quiche, quinoa, beans etc).