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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Guests
amother
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Sun, Oct 19 2014, 2:15 am
We were invited out for two meals the second days. One of them, I completely forgot and we didn't go. I am SO embarrassed and I feel horrible that I put this family out by making food and prepping for guests who didn't come.
(Before you bash me I shoud say there was an work emergency so I had to work unexpectedly Monday and Tuesday of Chol HaMoed. Wednesday night we had guests that we have as a chessed, but they stress me out every time they come so I was focusing on that and it was not a pleasant dinner, so I never relaxed. And I made a meal for a family for the last days that needed that had to be delivered Wednesday, so Wednesday was just insane and Thursday morning I got up and started cooking for Thursday and for Shabbos and just totally forgot that I had made up for us to go to this family's house for lunch. My kids are not big enough to be much help and my husband gets home from work 15 mins before licht bentchen, so I literally never stopped Wednesday except to breathe a little.)
I apologized profusely, but I feel like I should also write a note and deliver the bottle of wine we were going to take to them also. Should I do something more? They were very nice about it when we saw them. I didn't even remember until we saw them walking home from shul on Friday. Ugh. I feel like such a jerk.
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ROFL
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Sun, Oct 19 2014, 2:17 am
Send them the bottle of wine with a nice note and invite them for a Shabbat soon!
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Smiling Wife
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Sun, Oct 19 2014, 2:33 am
Call apologize and / or send a bottle of wine with a note and /or invite them for sshabbos BUT HERE IS THE MOST IMPORTANT PART:
Do it right away don't wait to drown in more guilt and let it be bigger than it is. Don't get yourself in a situation where you avoid her because you are so embarrassed. Deal with it and get it over with you are HUMAN everyone makes mistakes and if she is not understanding it is not your issue. Your issue is to own up to it SOONER rather than later
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seeker
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Sun, Oct 19 2014, 2:39 am
I feel sorry for you, that's so awkward and it sounds liek you had such a hectic yomtov! I think sending the bottle of wine with an apologetic and appreciative note would be just the right thing to do. I think being a little bit specific in the apology might help them feel like you really understand rather than just being thoughtless.
Ouch.
On the bright side, if I had guests that didn't show up, I'd regret the extra stress I might have had preparing and the time spent waiting for them to show up but I'd still be happy with the surprise perk of having extra leftovers and not having to cook some other time
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amother
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Sun, Oct 19 2014, 3:30 am
OP, I admire you! The one thing I was guaranteed NOT to forget was the meal we were invited out for - one less I needed to cook! You must be an amaaaaaaazing balabuste if you " volunteered" for extra kitchen duty
(but your diary skills could use a little work - I agree with the suggestion to contact your hosts ASAP with a gift - you're lucky, they sound like really nice people BH!)
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imasinger
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Sun, Oct 19 2014, 4:45 am
I don't think you need to do any more than what you are already planning. Don't send food -- they are already going to be contending with the extra leftovers.
Do figure out how to prevent such a thing from happening in the future, not because it is such a big deal overall, but because it was upsetting for you.
Would it help to put a list of guests, plans, and menus on the fridge before YT? Could you taak your DH with printing it out and putting it up, since he isn't able to pitch in from home?
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