My 5 y o is driving us nuts

amother

Thu, Oct 30 2014, 5:17 pm

Our youngest is 5, going on 6 in a couple of months. She used to be so sweet and cooperative. 6 months ago a switch flipped and literally every 10-15 minutes of her awake life she is crying or screaming because she is frustrated about something or can't manage to do something for herself. She is in kindergarten and her days are long. Her attitude started it seems shortly after she started having to go to "after care" because of our work schedule. She doesn't nap anymore but I think she misses her pre-school "rest period". She didn't have school in the summer time but she wasn't a whole lot different then compared to now as far as attitude.

I know it is an adjustment but this phase she is in seems to be just going and going. We try to make sure she gets to bed at a 730 or 8 pm. We try to spend quality time with her after school.

I'm trying to decipher whether this is just a stage based on circumstances or did we create a spoiled child and we are dealing with the consequences now?

ven

Sat, Nov 01 2014, 6:01 pm

My sweet son is the same age as your daughter. Three months ago I just had enough. He was waking me up every two hours each night because of " bad dreams , to hot , to cold , thirsty , ... , .... " furthermore he doesn't really listen to anyone and kinda does his own thing. When he started to be really un respectful and demanding , I decided I had to act NOW . I started with house rules (7 ) who he has to follow ALL the time . If he doesn't , he goes directly in time out and if I have the feeling it doesn't really care I punish him with something he finds really important. I also give him tons of positive enforcement and a solid reward system . I never believed it would work , but I must say we got a long way already , very firm boundaries with a lot of encouragement really does work !
Maybe u could try the same thing . Good luck

mummiedearest

Sat, Nov 01 2014, 8:10 pm

have you looked into the situation with after care? this can be a sign that something fishy is going on.

it could also be exhaustion, hunger, thirst, or difficulty with friends at school. or just anger at being placed in school for the majority of the day. you can deal with the behavior by correcting it, but you should also look at the source of the problem.

amother

Sat, Nov 01 2014, 8:43 pm

She is in aftercare with her older siblings. There is one or two teachers there. Although aftercare is not a great source of entertainment, I don't think there is anything going on there.

She just told me today that her teacher never lets her talk. I don't know if my DD is embellishing (she does that) but she explained today that she never gets to say what she wants. I hear, "I don't get to express myself". Maybe she is feeling stifled or un-heard and is frustrated at the lack of control of the situation. On more than a few occasions she says her teacher "always yells" or "speaks really loudly". It's definitely a different environment from her previous K4 class.