5 year old starving in school

Log in / Sign Up

List of Forums + New Post Recipe Box Usergroups Following My Posts Bookmarks

Private Messages Advanced Search Rules New User Guide FAQ Advertise Contact Us

Forum -> Parenting our children -> School age children

View latest: 24h 48h 72h

NYmommy

Mon, Nov 03 2014, 5:31 pm

My son is almost 5 years old. Growing up he's had some sensory issues which he got help via therapy & he basically outgrew them all. He is a very particular person, always makes sure he looks neat, never dirty etc.
The problem: Being that he grew up with sensory issues, he refused to touch food, I had to feed him. When he was real young it didn't really pose a problem, I just fed him. Later on he did begin to feed himself. Once he started cheider he refused to eat there at all. I used to give him breakfast at home and he starved himself till he got home 5 hours later. Now that he is older he is away from home much longer & this is getting out of control. We've tried just not making a fuss out of it & seeing if it will resolve itself, we've tried sending along food from my house so he's familiar with it, we've tried working with the teachers & even involving the principal, we've tried rewards & even punishment. NOTHING HELPED!
His new teacher this year told us to send along breakfast in cheider, he shouldnt eat home before he leaves in morning so he should get used to eating together with all boys. It worked for the breakfast thing for a good 2 weeks till today. He started that he doesnt like the breakfast I sent along (I sent along the same breakfast hes happy to eat when he's home!). Today he came home 4:00 fasting, he didn't even touch his breakfast or lunch! You can just imagine his mood...

Any ideas what I can do to help him adjust?

amother

Mon, Nov 03 2014, 5:38 pm

I have two children who are like your son. I never sent them to therapy. Maybe I should. I give them big breakfast and my 10 yo takes a piece of matza for lunch which she give few bites for a Bracha and for snack she does eat the junk food. I give her wafers, cake pretzels etc. I try to give something that will fill her up a little. She comes home hungry at four but not completly starving. My older 16 yo son is in yeshiva and he gets breakfast there that he eats a little and he buys his lunch and dinner. It gets expensive. Usually hamburger or pizza. I also need advice but this is how I deal with it.
I don't think that eating breakfast at school will work. Just feed him a lot before he leaves. I used to go and bring my son to school fresh Hot lunch when he was in elementary school. He ate that. For few years he went to s school that had hot lunches and he liked to eat it. Otherwise if it is not hot and fresh on the table he won't eat it.

Dolly Welsh

Mon, Nov 03 2014, 5:46 pm

Talk to the ped. Get reference for a professional who deals with this as a specialty.

Try to get a one-a-day child's chewable vitamin into him, while checking with the ped. Kosher Vitamins dot com is a good website.

See if you can get yogurt into him; he needs the fermented gut flora. Maybe he would like to help you make yogurt in a yogurt maker. Amazon has lots of them. Yogurt can be made without a yogurt maker but that is the easy, convenient way.

Avoid the athletic drinks, they have too much potassium.

Maybe get him some age appropriate books about 'where food comes from' about farms and all that. Maybe about what each animal eats, so he learns every living thing eats and it's fine.

There are books about cooking with kids. He is a bit young, but maybe do some of that, so he feels ownership of his food, and how it gets to be food.

See if you can take him around, at a very non-busy hour, to kosher food shops where men are baking and working with food.

MaBelleVie

Mon, Nov 03 2014, 5:48 pm

1. Start giving breakfast at home again, and try to make it a big one if possible.

2. Feeding therapy

mummiedearest

Mon, Nov 03 2014, 6:20 pm

definitely feed him breakfast at home. also, it sounds like he hasn't outgrown his sensory issues. he is likely overwhelmed with the loud nature of lunch in school and can't concentrate on eating or some such (sounds like my kids, btw). consider starting services for him again.

SingALong

Mon, Nov 03 2014, 6:46 pm

There r speech therapists and OTs who specialize in oral sensory issues. See if you can find one in ur area.

Is there a quiet room in school where he can eat? Maybe in a calmer environment he'll be able to eat better.

amother

Mon, Nov 03 2014, 6:53 pm

My son wouldn't anything that is wrapped in the backpack. It doesn't matter where and when.
Not the op.

animeme

Mon, Nov 03 2014, 7:15 pm

My D's wouldn't eat if he felt rushed or if the food changed texture or started to taste off (he could tell how long perishables were out of the fridge). For years he took a baggie of whole wheat pretzels to school and ate whenever it worked for him. Can your D's bring a snack to eat instead of a meal? Definitely feed him at home.

Also, make him drink. Water, juice, whatever. He will eat enough at home before and after but he needs to drink. Figure out what works best for him. My D's wouldn't do sports bottles. He either brought a plastic cup to use at the water fountain or a small regular water bottle with a cap.

naomi2

Tue, Nov 04 2014, 8:34 am

I second the feeding therapy recommendation.
you can try some other ideas for the meanwhile but in the end, he really needs professional help.
he's hungry and ill bet it's a real challenge for him that he wishes he could overcome.

eli7

Tue, Nov 04 2014, 9:14 am

If you pack things he can eat with a fork or spoon instead of hands would that help?

chani8

Tue, Nov 04 2014, 9:21 am

Think calories, not 'meals'. Make sure he gets enough calories in his day, medically speaking, and then don't worry about it. If he'll eat a bag of pretzles and/or cornflakes or whatever, then don't worry about quality, just make sure that it's plenty of calories. Just prepare a good breakfast and dinner with healthy protein and fat.

amother

Tue, Nov 04 2014, 9:38 am

My son's like yours but a bit older (2nd grade). We make sure he has a big hot breakfast of things he likes (oatmeal, whole wheat muffins, Ezekiel toast with peanut butter, or fried potatoes). He usually takes seconds on that. He takes much more snack than a normal kid would, so that helps too. Rebbe was worried about him not eating lunch, so we started sending Tradition soups, which are terrible for you, but at least he'll eat them, and Rebbe is happy to fill the hot water for him. When he gets home, he eats a hot snack, like a baked potato or a quesadilla.

For years he barely ate vegetables, but this year he started eating a lot of raw vegetables if they're cut and waiting on the table before supper, and has totally shocked me by nibbling on swiss chard and spinach while I'm checking them for salad! So...there's hope!

greenfire

Tue, Nov 04 2014, 10:26 am

my kids never ate school lunches.

start your morning by waking up early enough to eat a good breakfast at home and send healthy snacks

then have dinner ready as soon as they come home - even if it's 4:00 pm

you cannot coddle a picky eater by running after them to feed them

give him a wet paper towel to clean himself off in between bites

you are creating your own little monster - let go

oliveoil

Tue, Nov 04 2014, 11:28 am

I agree with Greenfire - big breakfast before he leaves and dinner ready when he comes home. Lots of kids don't eat in school. It's not ideal, but it's doable this way.

Dina_B613

Tue, Nov 04 2014, 5:59 pm

Unless his feeding therapist recommends it, don't try punishing him. It will only make his food experience more negative.

Page 1 of 1