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Forum
-> Relationships
-> Simcha Section
greenfire
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Thu, Nov 06 2014, 2:35 pm
what's your thought - bar or no bar - just wine on tables ... just wine for chuppah
what about guests that like to chill at a gathering of any kind with a cocktail in hand
isn't it appropriate to have l'chaims at a wedding
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teddyb
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Thu, Nov 06 2014, 2:49 pm
depends on how much $ there is to spend.
By my wedding there was only wine at the chuppa. Bars cost. if one likes to chill with a cocktail... well pick a soda, water or juice instead. cant always have what you like.
and lchaims (whiskey usually, no?) are diff then wine.
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Scrabble123
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Thu, Nov 06 2014, 2:52 pm
Many weddings have bar tables, especially on the men's side. I often see little boys bringing their mothers drinks. I think you'd really appreciate a bar table, wouldn't you?
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proudmother1
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Thu, Nov 06 2014, 2:54 pm
Depends a lot on the crowd you are expecting.
Just a bit of advice. Learn from your daughter.
Do what you feel is right. Don't worry so much about what the neighbors will say.
Whether its a ring, color of a gown, booze at the wedding.
Enjoy this. Don't stress so much.
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nyer1
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Thu, Nov 06 2014, 2:58 pm
really depends on crowd and budget.
at my wedding, it was a GIVEN that my parents needed an open bar to cater to their friends, neighbors, coworkers and extended family. my in laws didn't really want it but obviously agreed to it to satisfy and negotiate with my family. in the end, their guests definitely appreciated it too.
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Ruchel
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Thu, Nov 06 2014, 3:23 pm
We had wine at the tables. I rarely see bars. Actually trying to remember when I did last
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OOTBubby
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Thu, Nov 06 2014, 6:39 pm
It really depends on the choson and his crowd -- you want to be sure you don't have a bunch of drunk (and possibly underage) bochurim to deal with. It is usually much safer to do wine only (and even that is often done only for the men's tables).
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Yael3
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Thu, Nov 06 2014, 6:46 pm
It's a personal decision. I did not want any alcohol at my wedding. We had grape juice at the chuppah.
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nicole81
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Thu, Nov 06 2014, 9:04 pm
I'm getting married in a couple of weeks and we're having an open bar because, as a guest, my favorite types of affairs are those with freely flowing alcohol
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greenfire
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Thu, Nov 06 2014, 9:07 pm
nicole81 wrote: | I'm getting married in a couple of weeks and we're having an open bar because, as a guest, my favorite types of affairs are those with freely flowing alcohol |
I feel you ...
mazel tov l'chaim
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Peanut2
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Thu, Nov 06 2014, 9:46 pm
Mazal tov NIcole!!
We had a bar and I thought it was a given. We had wine, too.
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Frumdoc
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Fri, Nov 07 2014, 5:50 am
We had wine on the tables, no bar. Not a drinking crowd, I think most of the wine was left and used for sheva brachot all week.
Diet coke was a necessity, though!
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shabbatiscoming
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Fri, Nov 07 2014, 5:53 am
Yael3 wrote: | It's a personal decision. I did not want any alcohol at my wedding. We had grape juice at the chuppah. | Same here. My husband was very adamant about NO bar. There was a bottle on each table and also grape juice at the chupah
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shabbatiscoming
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Fri, Nov 07 2014, 6:00 am
OOTBubby wrote: | It really depends on the choson and his crowd -- you want to be sure you don't have a bunch of drunk (and possibly underage) bochurim to deal with. It is usually much safer to do wine only (and even that is often done only for the men's tables). | Just wondering why its only important about the chatan's crowd and not the kallah's crowd?
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ElTam
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Fri, Nov 07 2014, 6:17 am
Greenie, in all the weddings I have been to in our town, I can think of one that had a bar, and it was a very expensive wedding where everything you could spend money on was spent on.
Wine bottles usually on the tables after the first dance.
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amother
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Fri, Nov 07 2014, 7:12 am
We're making a wedding soon, we are having wine on each table and a little round table with whiskey. Not an official bar. It really DOES depend on the chatan and his friends. Many of them need a little lift before the dancing. I despise alcohol and I am worried about the friends drinking too much.
OP, good luck with your wedding plans and mazel tov.
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Ruchel
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Fri, Nov 07 2014, 7:20 am
I don't understand why it would depend only on one side.
That said I would be worried if anyone needed alcohol to have fun.
We certainly didn't have the friends in mind planning our wedding. Us first, then close family, then more distant family ok.
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amother
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Fri, Nov 07 2014, 8:39 am
I never saw bars by the ladies. I don't know about the men. Wine I saw at very few occasion and most of the time it's the bottle that nobody wants or dares to touch. For our chasuna, I bought the wine because I love wine and DH too. The funny thing is I didn't have the chance to drink some during the meal!
In general, drinks for women really depend on the crowd.
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Lady Godiva
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Fri, Nov 07 2014, 8:48 am
Most weddings I've been to have one or two bar stands, and they're for both men and women.
If you can afford to have a bar, for sure have one. Otherwise wine on the table is perfectly fine.
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greenfire
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Fri, Nov 07 2014, 10:25 am
ElTam wrote: | Greenie, in all the weddings I have been to in our town, I can think of one that had a bar, and it was a very expensive wedding where everything you could spend money on was spent on.
Wine bottles usually on the tables after the first dance. |
the kids were just by a wedding where there were 2 bars - one on each side
in this case there will be numerous people that associate gatherings with some sort of bar - their friends - not frum relatives, etc.
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