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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Toddlers
SAHM need help. How bad is TV for them really?



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amother


 

Post Mon, Nov 10 2014, 8:45 am
I'm home all day with my 15 month old and I'm b"H expecting. I haven't felt well at all lately so TV has become my salvation. I hate sticking him in front of it as a babysitter but I just don't know what else to do. He seems content for a while but then gets fidgety and I let him practically destroy the house (all baby-proofed) so I can get a little rest.

We can't afford help and our families live too far away to come up.

Any suggestions what to do? I don't want to harm him in the long-run by plopping him infront of a DVD but I don't know what else to do.
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morah




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Nov 10 2014, 9:13 am
Its not ideal, but if you're an engaged enough parent to be concerned about it, the dire warnings don't really apply to you. Some people have rough spots in pregnancy, for me, the first 2 months postpartum are my low point. A little too much TV for a few months during a difficult time won't hurt in the long run provided that you are otherwise engaged and providing your kids with enriching stimulation. And even now, you can make sure to choose quality programming and watch with him, talk to him about what's on the screen instead of just letting him veg, and alternate betw3n the screen and letting him trash the house, which should further mitigate the negative effects.
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amother


 

Post Mon, Nov 10 2014, 9:26 am
I let my kids have a lot (probably too much) screen time. I agree with Morah, that if you're worrying and thinking about it, it probably isn't the end of the world. However, I've come to the conclusion that even if my kids are on a screen, I would rather on the computer or tablet playing games instead of watching videos. I don't know if that's a can of worms you want to open, but my son really enjoys playing games on the kindle fire and it has a built in kids safe zone so he can't get to anything but what I explicitly allow. I figure the games at least are interactive, and it's hard to find stuff for kids these days that doesn't at least pretend to education. We also got him his own kid sized mouse, as well as one of the old reader rabbit games for the computer. You don't need to actually click for those-everything is done by hovering, so it's easy for even little little kids to play.
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amother


 

Post Mon, Nov 10 2014, 11:08 am
Thank you for your responses.

What would you suggest is a good time limit I could impose? I try to sleep as he watches and sometimes I can get in an extra hour which is wonderful, but again - not helpful for him.

Also, are there any other activities that you would suggest I can do even while I'm not feeling so well? Something I can do while lying down, etc...
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granolamom




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Nov 10 2014, 8:59 pm
meh. I let my kids watch tv when I was pg so I could nap a bit. so far they are turning out ok (no terrible cognitive or personality problems). worst thing was that I had the theme song to 'franklin' stuck in my head for oh about 4 years, but the nap was worth it.
I did limit to an hour (ok sometimes more if I was up all night with the toddler). and if your a SAHM you probably spend a lot of time with your dc otherwise so I really would not worry.
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MaBelleVie




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Nov 10 2014, 9:10 pm
I am VERY anti screen time for toddlers but if you aren't feeling well enough to care for him and you can't get help, screen time is far preferable to other options. I hope you feel better soon Smile
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miami85




 
 
    
 

Post Mon, Nov 10 2014, 9:16 pm
I agree with the previous posters. If you are otherwise giving your child attention. Giving him/her language input, perhaps discussing what's going on in the video from time to time, and if your child has an otherwise healthy attention span it shouldn't be a problem in the long run. If you can balance it out with some story time and/or outside time--weather permitting, at least part of the day. As they say with food "part of a balanced diet".
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israeli83




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 18 2014, 2:06 pm
I'm also a stay at home mom. So with my first born, I didn't show him any tv until he was 20 months old when my second one was born. Once I had to watch two kids by myself, it got harder. So sometimes I had to show my older one some tv so I could put my baby to sleep for naptime. I feel bad that now my baby (who's now a toddler) started watching tv at an earlier age because my older one was watching...but I used to limit it for 30 minutes a day. Also, I tried to put on some "educational" programs in hebrew or english. It's difficult to be a stay at home mom and do everything. Today I have to put on some tv when I have to cook dinner if I see that the kids are bored or can't play nicely by themselves. So yea, I also didn't want to show them tv at first, but sometimes you need to do it.
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amother


 

Post Thu, Dec 18 2014, 2:25 pm
Does it have to be TV? Can you use some other electronic device that might have something educational on it. By the time my son was 1 year old, he knew how to use my iPhone and find the application that had puzzles on it that he would do by moving the pieces with his finger.

I am not saying give him your phone, but maybe there is someother electronic toy that would hold his attention and would be interactive so he isn't just sitting in front of the TV. leapfrog, or something,
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amother


 

Post Thu, Dec 18 2014, 2:33 pm
amother wrote:
Does it have to be TV? Can you use some other electronic device that might have something educational on it. By the time my son was 1 year old, he knew how to use my iPhone and find the application that had puzzles on it that he would do by moving the pieces with his finger.

I am not saying give him your phone, but maybe there is someother electronic toy that would hold his attention and would be interactive so he isn't just sitting in front of the TV. leapfrog, or something,


Many studies indicate that these types of games are just as detrimental to children's developing attention spans and fine motor skills as television. Every parent needs to decide what works for them, but it isn't a "slam dunk" that a tablet or phone is better than television.
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little_mage




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 18 2014, 3:56 pm
amother wrote:
Many studies indicate that these types of games are just as detrimental to children's developing attention spans and fine motor skills as television. Every parent needs to decide what works for them, but it isn't a "slam dunk" that a tablet or phone is better than television.


Just wondering if you could provide a link to some of these studies? I'd be curious. Thanks.
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kollel wife




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 19 2014, 10:40 am
I think what you're doing is fine (and I don't have a TV in my house) but I would not worry so much.
What if you had the flu and have no one to help with your baby - you do what you have to !!!!

Other ideas for whatever it's worth.
Saving special toys for when you want to nap and can you put him/her in the crib with these toys while you're resting.

Children's tapes or DVDs - Uncle Moishy songs, things that would be good for a very young age, where ideas of Yom Tov and Shabbos and the repetition would be understood by a very young child.

Is there any indoor playground you can go to?
Of course not feeling well it's hard to chase/watch a child anywhere but a chance of scenery is helpful to keep the baby busier than your four walls.
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saw50st8




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Dec 19 2014, 10:52 am
Do you have any indoor gym places nearby? If so, get membership and let him run around while you sit and watch.
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lattemom




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Dec 20 2014, 10:47 pm
Whenever I needed some time to rest while I was pregnant I took out some Play-doh for my son.(My son was older at the time than yours is, so I am not sure if this suggestion is helpful.) I would go to Target and stock up on the four color containers from the dollar section and it would always give me at least 45 minutes of some good rest. I would cover an area with newspaper so it would be easy to clean up and I had a one and done rule so no matter if he would mix all the colors I would just throw it away when he was finished playing. Eventually we got a little more sophisticated and bought some tools.
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