Kids sent home from school. cant afford tuition

amother

Fri, Nov 14 2014, 7:35 am

My kids are home cause my dh is out of a job and is not able to pay tuition for last 3 months and school wont hear of anything im loosing my mind what do I do we are searching for jobs for the last couple of months and so far nothing suitable has come up what do peaple do in those situations. We cant really borrow any money cause we owe enough as is. I feel so bad for my kids they beg to go back to school

amother

Fri, Nov 14 2014, 7:56 am

How o ld are your kids? Are tgete other scholls in your area? Any other kids not in school? I agree you should set sometjing up temporarily for your k I ds. Talk to the teachers and fund out the c lass material so they can keep up. If its too hard for you to teach them, maybe you gave some freinds who are hone that would volunteer?

amother

Fri, Nov 14 2014, 8:01 am

This makes me sad. How can y I u effectively look for jobs and save money when you have kids at home who you need to be with and somehow entertain all day. Are there any type of scholarships fir them? Check with your jewish f ederation. I belueve tgey have emwrgency funds and it sounds like this may wualify.

amother

Fri, Nov 14 2014, 8:45 am

I feel very sorry for you as I am in the same place. The only difference is one school is letting us stay but we owe around 20000 dollars that we will have to pay back forever.
My husband is also out of work for along time and in order for me to get a decent paying job I have to go back to school which is not an option.
My other kids school made us call a wealthy parent to ask if they would help with tuition. My husband hated to do it but there was no option.
I don't know where you live but I suggest you get any rav that you feel has influence over the school to go down on your behalf and ask them to let your kids back. Call everyday or go down to the rav in person until something is done.

Hatzlocha and may things get easier in the right time in a good way.

Notsobusy

Fri, Nov 14 2014, 9:21 am

This is so sad. My heart breaks for you and your children. Isn't there anyone who can help you speak to the school? Maybe your rav, even if he's not involved with that school, they may respect him enough to listen, or he may know someone else who can talk to them. Hatzlachah - I daven that your husband should find a job really quickly.

Barbara

Fri, Nov 14 2014, 9:34 am

amother wrote:

Call your rabbi. Tell him what's going on. Your shul may have a discretionary fund that could help, or your rabbi may be able to put pressure on the school.

I take it that you're homeschooling right now. Have you considered putting the kids in public school temporarily, if that's not working?

And I know that you and your DH are looking for suitable jobs, and that makes sense. But in the meantime, have you considered applying for seasonal employment at a retail store? At least its money coming in.

nyer1

Fri, Nov 14 2014, 12:09 pm

I'm sorry for your situation, it sounds really tough.

with regards to 'nothing suitable' for a job…

one of you, or both of you, should take a job, ANY JOB, whether suitable or not until the situation improves. no job is beneath you if you don't have one to begin with. take ANY JOB, while applying for something better

Miri7

Fri, Nov 14 2014, 3:12 pm

What kind of a school is this????
(this is a rhetorical question, I'm not asking for actual info about the school)

I was on the board of my kids' school a while back, and we had some families fall into similar situations (though we never knew which ones, to protect their privacy), and we were committed to letting the kids stay. I just cannot imagine dropping kids in the middle of the school year. We identified other sources who could step in an help cover the cost, approached wealthy community members, federation, etc. But we NEVER embarrassed our parents by telling them which family was on such hard times.

But we did make it clear to these families that as soon as they had income, they had to start paying some. So they worked out a pmt plan, and expected them to make their payments on time, even if they were quite small. It was more the principle - that we as a school will meet our obligation to help you if we see you are really making the effort to contribute according to your means.

I agree that going to a rav to be your advocate is a good idea. Also he may know of sources willing to provide your kids with a "scholarship." There are many generous people who will help kids with school when the parents are unable to pay.

Bhatzlacha with finding jobs ASAP and getting the kids back in school.

SRS

Fri, Nov 14 2014, 3:55 pm

OP, what has been your relationship to the school in the past as parents of students and tuition payers? Is there anything going on at the school that the schools has turned their backs on your family rather than work with you? It is a sad situation.

I'm not sure what you mean by suitable job, but it is the holiday season and Barbara is correct about available jobs for the time being. There is also public school on a temporary basis if you feel you cannot homeschool your children during this time.

causemommysaid

Fri, Nov 14 2014, 4:25 pm

I can't understand how a Jewish school can do this.

It has become completely unacceptable to send religious children to public school.

This puts a tremendous pressure on parents to finance multiple private educations. It also SHOULD put a tremendous pressure on the day schools to work with parents who are not making it.

It HAS to work both ways.

Ruchel

Sat, Nov 15 2014, 12:25 pm

causemommysaid wrote:

It has become completely unacceptable to send religious children to public school.

My first reaction, as a teacher, and as someone who militates for Jewish school for all, is "untrue". Completely accepted in some circles, tolerable in others, shamefully done in others.

My second reaction: so they expect you'll go Chabad, where it's generally cheaper and where theygenerally (not always) keep those who can't pay.

Now, if the only school in the city is doing that... or if they davka say "there's a nice public school around" (heard, yes), I don't envy them in front of bet din shel mala. But, this is what humans do.

PinkFridge

Sun, Dec 07 2014, 9:21 am

amother wrote:

Hope things have changed for the better. Where do you live?

In light of some recent events, if I were OP I would be very leery about making myself vulnerable. I am a major defender of the amother feature, but I would suggest to people that if you're asking someone to make herself vulnerable, have the courtesy of using your sn, or explain why you feel compelled to go amother.

amother

Sun, Dec 07 2014, 12:37 pm

amother wrote:

We were told this will happen to our kids in February after midwinter vacation unless we pay up. To the tune of $8,000. Dh is also out of a job and my salary can't stretch any further. I have no idea what we will tell the kids. We've exhausted all our avenues for borrowing $$ as well.

amother

Sun, Dec 07 2014, 1:55 pm

PinkFridge wrote:

Maybe I feel compelled to go amother because I may be in a similar situation. Being that the OP is amother, responding that she lives in New York, Cleveland, LA, Chicago, etc. is not going to give her away or make her vulnerable.

SRS

Sun, Dec 07 2014, 3:42 pm

amother wrote:

It is hard to know what the right answer is when life needs to be downgraded so significantly, but perhaps honesty is really the best policy. Let the kids know just how much you value yeshiva, but that you are in over your head and that you hope to come together as a team and take certain steps so that it becomes a possibility again soon, but that in the meantime it just is not. Let them know that not being in yeshiva does not mean nor should ever mean an end to Jewish education.

While kids should not be privy to each and every financial detail in your life, they can learn from your mistakes and triumphs.