Vent: Tuition is scaring the living daylights out of me!!!

amother

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 12:42 pm

Just feeling so overwhelmed that had to vent- Tuition is terrifying me right now. With all the myriads of fees that are added on, the amount of tuition per child is astronomical and I am so stressed out for the future! We fall right in the bracket where we wouldnt qualify for a break, yet we come out so well behind everyone who is getting a break at the end of the day.
Is there anywhere where AFTER ALL THE FEES (building fund, journal, registration fee, etc etc), your tuition is under 9,500 per child?
AHHHH
Thank you for letting me vent.

Notsobusy

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 1:01 pm

Lakewood is cheaper - depends on the school, I would say between $4-6000.

There is one school that we pay full tuition to, but we told them no extra fees. We have never paid for a building fee, dinner etc. although we do pay the registration fee. It comes to a point where it's just not possible to pay for everything and still have food to put on the table. I think they were so happy we didn't ask for a tuition break, they didn't bother arguing about the rest of it.

sky

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 1:05 pm

I am also in Lakewood. Pay full tuition, plus all fees.

For my boys the total is under 6,000 and for girls under 5,000. (per child)

but even that low it adds up. It is important to us to pay it so we cut pack on a lot of things we see others take for granted: like I don't shop for my kids in Jewish stores, own Newish cars, live in a big house, go on expensive vacations, etc.

Last edited by sky on Tue, Nov 18 2014, 1:24 pm; edited 1 time in total

Shoelover

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 1:16 pm

sky wrote:

I am also in Lakewood. Pay full tuition, plus all fees.

For my boys the total is under 6,000 and for girls under 5

Wow that's cheap! They want $6,500 for my 3 yr old 9-1

nyer1

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 1:21 pm

definitely depends on the location and type of school. modern orthodox schools, where secular education is far superior than more yeshivish schools, are generally much more expensive. but in general, yes, the cost of tuition is CRAZY. as it is, I pay 7k for PRESCHOOL (only one child). and they tack on a mandatory dinner for 600 a couple. we can do it now, can't say what the future will bring. trying to take it a day at a time, and trying to minimize other expenses, saving what I can and limiting any extras. while others disagree, and I have already said it a number of times on this site, it definitely has an effect on the number of children I plan to have, because I really don't want to be in a place where I need to be on gov't assistance or scholarships in order to fund the lifestyle that I choose for myself. but everyone has different priorities. you will definitely see more people over the next 10-20 years who will homeschool or send to public school that would have otherwise sent to yeshiva if they could have afforded it. heartbreaking, but thats the reality.

amother

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 1:48 pm

Thank you for starting this thread!
I only have one in a 3 year old program and it costs me $7000 a year! I'm looking for a UPK program for next year so it will be cheaper, but there aren't too many. I have another boy and he'll also go to school starting next year and I have no idea how we'll be able to pay for both while my husband is the only one with income right now. It's really hard. I know that tuition goes higher as the kids grow older. I really want them to continue at a jewish orthodox school, but it doesn't look too bright in the future. Unfortunately, we'll probably have to send them to a good public school since we won't be able to afford anything! And I'm expecting another baby. Because of the expenses (mostly tuition) we might not want anymore kids.

Scrabble123

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 2:02 pm

Growing up I went to a private school which was much much more than OP's $9,500/child, but it was my parents' choice. In this situation parents do not have much of a choice because we want our children in a frum school that provides a yeshiva education. Then again, schools need money for buildings, staff, great teachers, programs, etc.

nyer1

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 2:47 pm

I would so much rather everything be grouped into one final lump sum. I hate hearing, ok, tuition is 7k, but u also have a building fee, dinner fee, registration fee. just make it 9k and call it a day.

chatouli

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 2:59 pm

I was upset about tuition until I looked at what high school costs. Now the amount I'm paying for early childhood sounds cheap in comparison. No clue how we will afford having two in high school and one in college!! (Where I live, high school costs around $25K per child!!!!!!!!!) shock

amother

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 3:02 pm

look in to places with vouchers- think south bend, Cincinnati, I think Milwaukee, it makes a big difference!
I think Scranton also has relatively inexpensive tuition.
A lot of the school fees are per family so the per kid cost will be determined by how many children you have in the school.

amother

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 8:32 pm

I am resentful because I KNOW that if it was accepted to go to public school my stress would be much lower. I would also be willing to have at least 3 kids more than I currently plan on having.

its not fair. I would love a larger family but Jewish lifestyle is just too expensive to do it.

I can't be in the poor house constantly just because the Jewish community decided it was too good for public school.

and no I cant send there because DH is not on board.

amother

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 9:14 pm

amother wrote:

Glad I'm chassidish! 3K only per child!!!!

What do your kids know when they graduate? There is a saying that "you get what you pay for".

I have been very blessed. I pay a bit more than you do, but the actual tuition per child it way more. My kids go to a school that based our tuition according to our income. My kids will hopefully graduate with a well rounded education.

elisheva25

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 9:16 pm

I think don't be afraid, fear can be paralyzing. Consider all your options and try to think of ways in which you can maximize your income in the near future. Consider maybe moving to cheaper areas. Many schools offer multiple children discounts. Some have tuition scholarships. You really can only take it one day @ a time.

amother

Tue, Nov 18 2014, 9:17 pm

We are MO my oldest is in kindergarten so we have not yet encountered the big tuitions although with three kids in school we are paying a lot and we were not gonna have another child. But I really wanted another so we went for it and I"H am pregnant I have no idea how we will handle tuition and there is a great public school here I was thinking tonight how tempted I would be to send there.
But....their friends may be Jewish but wont be religious so how will we be able to keep our kids shomer shabbos and eating kosher in that environment?
I would send to public school in a second but I think that would take 4 MO kids and make 4 non religious kids at the end of the day and I couldnt live with that guilt.....