dd taking medical marijuana

amother

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 2:42 am

my dd is almost 20 yrs old. Medical marijuana is legal where we live. She saw one of these doctors that write out prescriptions for it and she got a card. It was for her IBS, depression and anxiety. (she was also molested by my ex) she's had plenty of therapy and doesn't want it anymore. The doctor who prescribed it to her recommend she see a therapist. I prefer she get on psychotropic meds. I don't like her smoking it in the home and told her.

She is dropping out of some of her college classes.

today, she smoked it twice. When I came home (from a tehillim gathering for the Haf Nof incident, btw) I smelled the pot and reminded her that I don't like that she is using marajuana and asked her not to smoke in the home (where should she smoke it?) and that I feel like I may have to have her move out....

I'm so confused what to do. I am embarrassed. I am worried that, at her age, she is hindering proper brain development and coping skills. She says that its for the ibs and migranes, but also for recreation. she has smoked with others.

shabbatiscoming

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 2:58 am

amother wrote:

Why are you embarrassed? SOrry, out of your whole post, thats what jumped out at me. I am not sure what to think of medical marijauana, but thats besodes the point. A doctor did pescribe it for her.
But again, why are you embarrassed?

amother

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 3:27 am

op here, I know its not completely rational. But you have to admit that there is much stigma about marijuana use regardless of whether it is legal or not. I take psychotropic meds. I have worked a lot on myself to fight my feelings of stigma. Regarding the MD prescribing it, he prescribed it and told her to go into therapy too. She is only taking the marijuana.

However, stigma is [u]not[/u] the only issue though. I am also concerned that her use of it is affecting her development psychologically. The brain just isn't completely matured until mid 20's.

If a person is taking a prescription med daily, it doesn't have the same palliative affect as using something whenever there is a feeling of anxiety. Coping skills aren't learned well. At the same token, I will admit that my anti-anxiety meds have made possible for me to implement the skills I have been learning.... The caveat being [u]actively[/u] learning. As I said, she, on the other hand, isn't going to any kind of therapy.

She also has IBS which I feel comes from the sxl abuse and GAD.

She is a very intelligent, well read and articulate young lady. Was kind of precocious when young -- adults find her engaging. But she has always had a very hard time making friends with the girls her age. We are both kind of "out of the box" people. Now she hangs out with a few pot smokers, and I suspect there are a couple of them, guys, who connect with her just for smoking. this is not a healthy way to make friends. This is a very, very big concern of mine.

Secondly, she is reevaluating going to college. I am understanding of this. I have always encouraged her to try a short term vocational program because, while she has a strong intellect, her anxiety interferes with her academically. She has some ADD'ish issues which I think come from anxiety.

So this is where the concerns over the marijuana comes in -- I see it as maladaptive.

mandksima

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 5:12 am

I hear you, OP but you sound as if your daughter is 13, not almost 20. Your daughter is an adult now and needs to make her own decisions and mistakes. I can understand you not liking the marijuana but what control do you really have at this point assuming you don't want to alienate her? If she were already married would you interfere or let her decide how she is living her life? Smoking under your roof is a separate issue and you need to decide if you can live with it or if you need to ask her to find her own place at some point. Are there other children around?

imaima

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 5:25 am

I understand that if marijuana was prescribed, then she can smoke it at home, just as she would have taken a medicine at home. What is the difference here?
Do you have other children at home? Is she smoking in front of them? I would say, if it affects others in a bad way, then she needs to move out. She is way too old anyway.

I assume that it would be illegal for her to share her medical marijuana with friends...

Karnash

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 5:52 am

I think you should encourage her to smoke ONLY at home. If she was prescribed it for medical reasons, it is medication and should not be administered in social situations.
You do not want her smoking with friends - if she needs it to alleviate specific symptoms, then she should do it in the privacy of her home.
In this way you understand and recognize her need/pain but you neutralize the possible negative side effects.

amother

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 8:20 am

I'm sorry but as a survivor of s-z abuse, and also someone who has severe depression and anxiety ( who cannot take meds) and is still suffering ( even with therapy) I say bring on the pot!
I am not someone who advocates smoking it at all- I hate both smoking and drugs! BUT in this case, if it's bringing your daughter relief then leave her alone!
Therapy is not a great cure all ( u see that yourself, since you say she's had plenty of it) & neither is meds ( why are you so convinced of their safety? Have you read about their side effects?) trust me, there is no getting away from the hell that abuse wreaks. You cannot begin to imagine what it does to a person, esp if it was your ex doing it to her. Please, just leave her alone. Let her enjoy the relief she has.

mille

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 9:09 am

It's medication. She's not wasting her life away smoking pot all day for funsies.

Yes, she should also be in therapy. And you should encourage that. Or, strong arm her into it. As someone else said, who is paying for her medication? If it's you, you have a lot more say in asking her to go to a therapist.

If you don't like the smell, tell her to smoke in her room with the window open. It doesn't help totally, but helps some. Or she can find a method to eat it instead of smoke. I'd make a suggestion, but I feel like it'll just get the thread locked... Although I'm sure google searching about edibles will help.

Previous poster who suggested SSRIs, SSRIs are only effective for depression/anxiety with a specific cause.

If you are worried about how this will affect your daughter developmentally, bring it up with the doctor. There have been studies done about the affects of marijuana on the developing brain, but a big factor here is quantity and frequency. The studies, to my knowledge, have been primarily correlational studies, so causation might not be able to be determined.

chani8

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 10:07 am

Smoking it? I didn't realize that medical marijuana meant smoking it. That's crazy. It permeates the air and affects everyone who breaths it. Did you actually see this 'prescription'?

I totally agree with your concerns, OP. This doesn't sound healthy at all.

However, I think the goal with this DD is just to keep her safe, and having her move out of your home doesn't sound very safe.

If it were me, I would for sure have my child watch a Dr Amen youtube on brain health. But here is an article from his web site about marijuana (it supports your concerns): http://www.amenclinics.com/blo.....nges/

Barbara

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 10:32 am

chani8 wrote:

Yes, medical marijuana is usually smoked.

It is a known treatment for Crohns, so I'd have to guess that it is medically indicated for IBS as well. It is also a known treatment for migraines. So I've little question that it was properly prescribed.

OP. psychotropic drugs aren't going to do anything for IBS. They're not going to do anything for migraines. They may or may not help her anxiety, although I strongly suspect that marijuana will do so as well. You seem more worried about the "stigma" of people knowing that your daughter -- what, that she's taking a prescription drug -- than anything else. You'd rather have her take psychotropic drugs -- which you don't mention having been prescribed in all of the years of therapy she's had, don't explain who would help her physical issues, and don't address the problems with -- because they're more "acceptable."

We're only just beginning to understand the medical benefits of marijuana. Did you see the TED talk on the effect of THC on seizure disorders? How its saved lives?

Let her give it a try before you criticize. How about telling her she needs to open the window AND use a smokeless ashtray. http://www.amazon.com/s/?ie=UT.....0eq_b

Barbara

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 11:12 am

amother wrote:

Different amother here. Barbra, would you mind posting the link to the TED talk with the THC in marijuana? My daughter has been on a study with cannibus for her seizures without the THC. I would love to hear more about that. Thank you!

I think this is it:

http://www.leafscience.com/201.....ideo/

Maybe I mixed it up, though, and its without the THC. embarrassed

In any case, it sounds like its been miraculous for many people, and hope and pray that it helps your DD as well.

Fox

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 12:48 pm

OP, it sounds like your DD is a pretty normal 20-year-old in lots of ways.

Right or wrong, most 20 year olds in our culture are still casting around, trying to figure out what to do with themselves.

Sure, there are a handful of highly-driven, focused 20-year-olds who know exactly what they want and are high-tailing it down that road. But there are far more young adults who are more-or-less killing time in college or yeshiva while they attempt to figure out their lives.

If the marijuana lessens her anxiety and physical symptoms, be grateful she's found a comparatively inexpensive, non-invasive treatment. Do whatever is necessary to avoid having your house smell.

And as for the questionable friends and general aimlessness, do what every parent of a young adult does: coach in a non-judgmental way; point out the economic facts of life when necessary; listen until you think your ears will fall off; and daven.

FranticFrummie

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 1:19 pm

There are so many layers of issues here!

You need to deal with your embarrassment, and figure out what that means to you and your image of yourself.

You need to talk to your daughter about what's going on at school - OUTSIDE of the context of drug use. They may not be related at all, and you need to hear her feelings and thoughts about that.

Do you have a back porch, or other outside area where she can smoke? If it's the smell that's bothering you, then you can ask her to look into edibles, tinctures, and oils. Smoking is not the only delivery method, and is actually the least effective to get the maximum medical benefit.

Ask her if she will consider switching to CBC oil, which has all the benefits of medical marijuana, without the "getting stoned" effect. This is a safe and reliable brand http://www.bluebird-botanicals.....l.php More info here: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cannabidiol

For her IBS, she needs to be on a wheat and dairy free diet. It worked wonders for me. CBD oil does help with stomach issues, migraines, and anxiety extremely well, but she needs to see a nutritionist too.

She'll go back to therapy when she's ready. You can't force things like that.

If DD does not have clinical depression or Bipolar depression, then SSRI's won't work for her, and believe me, they DO have very long term effects. Trying an herbal remedy first makes a lot of sense. Valerian, passiflora, vervain, and chamomile are all herbs that are often used for anxiety too. If she's found something that works for her, see if you can work WITH her and find a compromise, instead of working against her.

BTW, when I was 16 my mom threw me out of the house for smoking marijuana. I didn't speak to her for 10 years. Are you sure you want to put your foot down like that?