Do you save money?

amother

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 5:29 pm

Do you have a savings account/investments? If so, how old are you and how many kids do you have in school? I'm asking bc my DH thinks our savings is not nearly enough and I think we are in a good position given our ages and how much time we still have before retirement. He thinks most people our age have as much or more. I don't.

So I'll go first. We are in our early-mid 30s and have two tuition payments. We will iy"H have about $400K in savings and investments by the end of 2014 not including any equity in our house.

amother

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 7:25 pm

amother wrote:

You are doing great. How much do you make?

I am in my 50s. I have 4 million including a paid up house worth close to 2 and half a million in jewelry.

Barbara

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 7:40 pm

I suggest that you discuss this with an investment adviser. No one here knows what you make, and how much money you will need at retirement. Nor is it relevant that someone else, with different income and different needs, has more or less than you.

And, frankly, whether or not anonymously, I'm not in the habit of discussing my assets with others.

amother

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 8:37 pm

Sigh. We actually have spoken to an investment advisor but that's not the point of this post at all. Maybe I wasn't clear. My DH is absolutely convinced that people our age save more than we do and I think he is wrong. This is not exactly a topic we can bring up at kiddush and ask everybody. Everyone is very happy to kvetch about tuition and so on, but no one wants to talk about their retirement savings. I completely understand why. That's why I am asking in an anonymous forum.

Note that I did not ask what anybody does for a living, whether both spouses work, or even how many kids you have (just how many tuition payments, which is not always the same number). I don't want anybody to compromise their privacy, chas veshalom. I just want a sense of whether I am right about this or whether he is.* If you aren't comfortable answering, then don't.

*I agree that what other people have isn't relevant to whether we have enough in savings. We have good advice from a financial planner to go on and BH we have been able to follow it. For some reason, my DH is always comparing us to other people and while I think it's an exercise in futility, I thought I would ask on the only anonymous forum I'm aware of with people who are similarly situated to us: paying yeshiva tuition, worrying about bar and bas mitzvah and wedding expenses, paying for YT, yet still interested in saving for our retirements and college and so on and so forth. So, any answers are much appreciated.

zaq

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 9:09 pm

OP, for a couple at your stage in life you are rolling in dough, and chances are you have not reached your maximum earning years. Your dh is delusional--very few frum couples your age have that kind of money floating around. But that's no reason to quit saving now.

TwinsMommy

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 9:10 pm

we are 40 years old, 2 kids in school.

ZERO savings and about $100,000 left in debt (mostly student loans). We do not own a home--- not sure whether we ever will, though we live in Cleveland where *IF* we decide to save $10,000 or so, that can be a good downpayment and our mortgage would certainly be cheaper than what we pay in rent now.

In my thinking, we're in the middle--- too poor to save, too rich to be supported by "programs", so we're just in debt debt debt.

I know VERY few people in your position. Mazel tov. Sadly, I know a lot of people who qualify for food stamps and medicaid and such.

amother

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 9:49 pm

zaq wrote:

Thanks, zaq, I also think he is delusional! Our expenses are only going up and income may actually go down (hopefully temporarily) but at this point we want compound interest to do its work and with G-d's help we will save what we can in the future.

amother

Wed, Nov 19 2014, 9:56 pm

Two tuitions (kids still young) ... we are in our low 30s... about 150k in saving..
plus savings accounts for kids... about 85k in retirement account plus a pension. No house... if we had a house we'd have NO savings. But you cant compare us to you because we only have one spouse working by choice. If we both worked, we could technically double these numbers(should that be what Hashem wants).

Bottom line...you CANT compare. One person may have no savings because of IF or other medical issues or a special needs child etc. etc. One person may have been given a down payment on a house and one not. Your spouse may make more money than mine so what exactly does anyone's savings account prove. One person may eat bread and peanut butter every night because they are frugal or miserly or what not.
Your savings are dependent on your income. You have 400k in savings so if you make 200k a year your doing great. If you make 2 million you should probably have more. You should also have more if you live in Midwest as opposed to Teaneck.
People will always be richer than you and people will always be poorer. Use a financial planner for your family's goals.

I will repeat...you cant compare!

amother

Thu, Nov 20 2014, 8:28 am

I feel like this is comparing apples to watermelon. there are so many factors involved. I entered my marriage with a trust fund so obviously that comes into play. also depends where you live and careers etc.
I'm in my mid twenties and my husband is in his mid 30s. been married less than 5 years. one kid with 7k tuition
we have:
170k put into a down payment
30k invested in a trust
30k in savings
25k in my retirement
25k in DH's retirement
5k in my son's college fund
another 12k held up in an escrow for 2 years
we do automatic transfers from the checking account. that really helps. once our paychecks go through direct deposit, some of the money automatically gets wired into the savings, so that really helps. same with retirement funds. we never held the money so we never miss it.
we are also very money conscious and we rarely splurge.

Ruchel

Thu, Nov 20 2014, 8:40 am

I don't discuss my personal money either (very not done by me) but mostly I hear/read of couples have an account where they try to have money on it. Some don't manage... some manage quite well... some get like 10 000 euros a year on it and blow it on crazy vacays or wtv every year.

Someone who lives in social projects can save (no debt, low rent) more than someone who blew everything to buy- but in the end the second one has the value of his house.

Ancient/family stuff, jewelry... is also a "saving" hence why ouat women got jewelry as kalla, "in case" (not said like that but...) and some cultures would always wear them (often under shawls) so they don't get stolen.

Some accounts "grow" with time- fast paced investments though can be very risky.

You need a counsellor

amother

Sat, Nov 22 2014, 11:21 pm

okay, let's see:
dh and I are late 30's with 5 tuitions to pay...

about 120 equity in the house
still owing about 80 on the house (yes, cheap house OOT only worth about $200,000)

savings of about 2000 only in our savings account
savings in 4 of hte kids names of about 4000 each,that's it...
about 48000 in dh's retirement fund, I dont have one
no money left at the end of each month

so yes OP, I would suggest that compared to us you are doing remarkably well Very Happy

amother

Sun, Nov 23 2014, 12:45 am

late 20's, no tuition yet, no house. About 30,000 in savings toward a down payment, car replacement and emergency fund. b"h a year ago it was barely 10,000 so we are saving well at the moment. But I doubt our numbers will look anything like yours in 10 years.

amother

Sun, Nov 23 2014, 12:53 am

Late 20s, one tuition and one baby.

Recently bought and renovated a house, about $1900 monthly mortgage (includes taxes & insurance), renovations paid for.

$58k in savings, another $12k (I think) in old savings bonds.

No retirement funds.

About $6k in older DC's bank account and $1500 in younger DC's.

Sounds like you're doing amazing, OP, but as other posters have said it really depends on your individual lifestyle...

busymom

Sun, Nov 23 2014, 1:01 am

Op, your husband may have issues re feeling a sense of security, which is completely unrelated to your financial situation. If that's the case, he'd feel the same even if ur savings were double. Maybe he needs a daily dose of shaar habitachon or some books on anxiety instead of reports abt other ppl.
Finances can be scary, and at the end of the day, no one is guaranteed anything; we can only do our best and pray.

amother

Tue, Nov 25 2014, 6:48 pm

Mid 30s, one income, 4 tuitions at MO schools....about 1 million in total assets (incl retirement, house etc etc)

Unless you poll the entire frum population, this thread will prove nothing to your husband. But, imo, you're doing great. Sit down with a financial advisor and he'll be able to summarize your financial health.