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Babysitter is Expecting bs"t



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amother


 

Post Sun, Dec 21 2014, 2:21 am
What should I do? My babysitter (mitapelet) is expecting. By looking at her, I would think she has another 3-4 months to go. My baby is 5 mos. and I really wanted her to like her mitapelet before she gets to the stranger-anxiety phase. It looks like the mitapelet is going to be leaving right when the baby is at that age. I am not in love w/ my mitapelet, but it's convenient b/c she lives in my bldg. and she doesn't mind that I don't have set hrs. and don't send the baby every day.

I am a first mother, what happens when the mitapelet goes on vacation (I'm assuming it's the 3 month standard Israeli vacation, which makes my baby around 1 when she returns.)? What does she do w/ the kids? (Not comfortable asking unless she mentions it) Also, would you advice me to look for another babysitter while the baby still likes strangers?
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DrMom




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 21 2014, 4:39 am
Did the mitapelet not even mention to you -- her employer -- that she was going to be taking maternity leave? That is very odd, as it is late enough that she is showing.

Perhaps you could verify in the context of: "I wanted to discuss your hours and working duties over the next x months" and see if she mentions anything.

Is it possible that other is some other medical condition causing the change in her appearance (a cyst/swelling of some sort??)?

If she is going to be taking leave, you can ask her if she can recommend someone to fill her place while she is away, and try to have your baby get to know her beforehand.
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nameless




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 21 2014, 5:11 am
Where I live, standard protocol is to tell a few months before they take off. They usually will find someone to take over for them in that person's apartment. So the whole group will stay together and be watched by someone else. So althought it may be a new place and mitapelet your child will be staying with the same kids. Also, I assume a mishpachton/maon would be a little different but if the playgroup is not legal and is just babysitting in someone's house they don't usually take off 3 months. Usually not more than 1.
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imaima




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Dec 21 2014, 7:22 am
Maybe she will only take one month off and continue to watch everyone plus her own after 1 month?
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RachelEve14




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 23 2014, 7:26 am
Unless it is a private metapelet only for her child, no the OP is not her "employer." If the metapelet is legal I assume she will take her 14 week leave. If she's not, maybe she isn't planning on taking extra leave or she's planning on bringing a sub in for when she is PP. If you are not in love anyway there is no reason not to look for a new metapelet, but she might have it figured out in any case. Maybe she is due right around Pesach when there is vacation anyway? Tryy asking about her plans & schedule for Pesach and see if that opens anything up.
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FranticFrummie




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Dec 23 2014, 7:46 am
Don't panic yet. Some kids go through anxiety stages early, some later, and some don't go through it at all. My DD never did! Even if your child does go through it, it's not the end of the world. She'll outgrow it, and will not remember a thing.

Who knows, maybe you had a horrific anxiety stage at that age. Do you remember anything about it?

I'm sure that you'll find a nice girl to take over, and everything will be fine. Don't go worrying about something that hasn't even happened yet, and might not happen at all.
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amother


 

Post Tue, Dec 23 2014, 7:47 am
It's a mitapelet working in her house. I doubt she's legal.

Overall, my baby is VERY friendly. Like the type of baby that laughs at random strangers. Right now she's almost 6 mos. I'm not sure how bad the stranger anxiety will be. But, I don't work on such a steady basis, so I need her to feel comfortable and not have to re-adjust if she has a break from the babysitter.

I like the idea about Pesach or saying s/t in a hinting type of way. I could totally be wrong and she could be not so far along. But, she is wearing maternity and I'm usually bad at noticing (only really notice at the 6 mo. mark, unless the person carries huge). If she's not planning on taking a long break, that's good, but then again, the babies might suffer if she's not up to carrying them (DD is rather large) or she's tired. This might not be so good either.
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