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Forum
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hifromkgh
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 Sun, Dec 21 2014, 9:49 pm
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Is it just me or when I see people outside their lives seem much more simple than mine. My marriage has seen its better days, my kids are all difficult and super challenging...their teachers are complaining, my baby doesn't stop screaming, we need money ....we are seemingly functioning and normal but when I see those families at the stores or chanuka parties, kids all match perfectly, they sit and eat the meals without screaming and yelling like mine...couples look like they r on talking terms, while we have nothing to talk about bec we r so stressed....would love to hear from others so I don't feel like the only one out there with a far from perfect life....thanks for sharing!!!
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the world's best mom
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Sun, Dec 21 2014, 9:58 pm
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Nobody has the perfect life. Some people are just better at pretending than others. Everyone has their pekel.
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SRB
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Sun, Dec 21 2014, 10:10 pm
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I often say, "you don't know what's going on behind closed doors unless you are there". I think that in our religious life style we keep things private/quiet/polite - not to say I think this is healthy but people are worried about what other people think - in my option, too much. Sidduch is a big reason. So don't feel like you are the only one with a not so perfect life. We are all imperfect humans trying to figure it all out.
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zaq
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Sun, Dec 21 2014, 10:37 pm
| hifromkgh wrote: | | Is it just me or when I see people outside their lives seem much more simple than mine. My marriage has seen its better days, my kids are all difficult and super challenging...their teachers are complaining, my baby doesn't stop screaming, we need money ....we are seemingly functioning and normal but when I see those families at the stores or chanuka parties, kids all match perfectly, they sit and eat the meals without screaming and yelling like mine...couples look like they r on talking terms, while we have nothing to talk about bec we r so stressed....would love to hear from others so I don't feel like the only one out there with a far from perfect life....thanks for sharing!!! |
The way these "perfect" families look to you is the way you look to them. Nobody has a perfect life; there are only varying degrees of imperfection.
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hifromkgh
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Mon, Dec 22 2014, 10:28 am
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Please share your imperfections....
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bookworm10
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Mon, Dec 22 2014, 10:37 am
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Ehh. I have learned a long time ago that no one has a perfect life. I get jealous sometimes of people who seem to have it easier, always well dressed, tons of money to go on vacations etc but I know in my heart that everyone has their struggles, just like me.
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greenfire
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Mon, Dec 22 2014, 4:02 pm
why does it make you feel better if someone else has it as bad as you ?
so my life isn't 'perfect' & neither is the rest of the world ... that just makes me sadder
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dot
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Mon, Dec 22 2014, 4:38 pm
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When you're going through tough times it helps to hear about other people's struggles. Like in a support group, you feel less alone and your problems can seem less stark in the context of other's problems.
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zaq
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Mon, Dec 22 2014, 5:17 pm
If you really need to see other people's misery to feel better about your own life, just visit a children's cancer hospital...or a nursing home.
Oh, heck, who needs to do that? Just read imamother.
Or maybe not. You might read about some incredible N'shei Chayil (and I do mean that as women of VALOR, not just a flowery word for frum homemakers) who have gone and are going through absolute hell and yet somehow manage to hold it together and come out the other side stronger, wiser, more self-confident and altogether "better,not bitter". And that might make you feel about two inches tall for grousing about your own "so not perfect" life. So if just plain feeling better about yourself as you are now is what you seek, as opposed to inspiration to change things, do not, I repeat not, read about these women on imamother.
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