how can I teach my 2 yr old to play by himself & not need me

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Forum -> Parenting our children

How can I teach my 2 yr old to play by himself & not need me

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amother

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 1:10 pm

I have one child, a bright, smart, verbal, active 2 year old. I do not have any other children, yet. he always needs me. he does not know how to play with a toy by himself just for a few minutes. he has plenty of toys but is never interested in them, unless I sit and play with him the whole time.
above all he prefers to help me in the kitchen by pulling up a chair and doing everything that I am doing. is there a way that I can teach him to entertain himself for short periods of time? I am tired of always having the neighbor's kids over so that my son has entertainment, and I could use a break from constantly entertaining him.
thanks!

FranticFrummie

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 4:00 pm

It's a tough age! People think newborns are hard, but I beg to differ.

Do you have a Pack n' Play? It's the only thing that's saved my sanity. I could have DD near me while I worked, did dishes, etc. but she couldn't get into things and wreak havoc.

He'll learn eventually, and being in a play pen will help. Make sure he has lots of toys, a soft blanket, and a picture book.

In between times, make sure he gets to run around HARD, in the yard or at a park. He needs to balance quiet play with lots of exercise and attention.

Dolly Welsh

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 4:04 pm

You have a sociable kid. They also come more introverted. To each his own nature.

In a playpen where he can see you, and you are in the same room, and he has things to work with, he will be all right, more or less. You will chat companionably with him while you do things, but he will be confined in the playpen. He does need eye contact and talk.

If YOU have a lady over to talk to, watching you and her talk to each other will keep him occupied too, and be very good for his language development.

justforfun87

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 4:52 pm

Have you considered sending him out for part of the day? This way you get your time to get things done and you will hopefully appreciate him when he comes home.

amother

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 5:46 pm

Didn't we have a thread two weeks, about preventing little boys from playing with themself

Sorry couldn't resist Wink

MagentaYenta

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 6:04 pm

amother wrote:

Didn't we have a thread two weeks, about preventing little boys from playing with themself

Sorry couldn't resist Wink

Yea that special numbing cream works wonders Rolling Eyes

chanee

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 6:14 pm

Why not try games? Like connect four or memory game to play by himself.

baltimoremom

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 6:20 pm

2 year olds are two old to be put in a pack n play. I used let my kids bring a few toys into the kitchen. Such as cars or trucks and that way I can interact while cooking. Or coloring is great and again u can check his picture while you cook. Play dough is good too he can pretend to cook.It's a hard age because they cannot read or do a lot on their own I would say 15 min is about all you can expect for him to do on his own without you checking in.

mummiedearest

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 6:26 pm

it's not that hard, in my experience. when he asks you to play with him, sit with him for five minutes. then pop up and say, "mommy has to check on something in the kitchen. I'll be back soon." go to the kitchen for thirty seconds, come back. repeat again after a while, this time for a full minute. do this a few times a day, increasing the time you spend away from your child. he should be ok with it, he knows you're coming back. once he can handle a few minutes on his own, you can tell him that you need to do something for a few minutes and then you'll play with him. keep some kiddie music playing so he doesn't notice the quiet. and include him in your activities some of the time, you don't want him to ignore them. my toddler washes dishes with me, helps me load/unload the washing machine and dishwasher, sweeps with me (with a short broom), dusts with me (baby wipe), cleans up toys, sorts laundry, makes the bed (she sits on the bed while I spread the blanket over her), and cooks with me. it's quality time together, and it's good for her education. I do play with her/read to her, but she also entertains herself quite nicely.

sourstix

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 6:49 pm

[quote="amother"]I have one child, a bright, smart, verbal, active 2 year old. I do not have any other children, yet. he always needs me. he does not know how to play with a toy by himself just for a few minutes. he has plenty of toys but is never interested in them, unless I sit and play with him the whole time.
above all he prefers to help me in the kitchen by pulling up a chair and doing everything that I am doing. is there a way that I can teach him to entertain himself for short periods of time? I am tired of always having the neighbor's kids over so that my son has entertainment, and I could use a break from constantly entertaining him.

thanks![/quote]

2 of my kids were like this and one is still that way some outgrow it and some have a hard time till they get older. some children automatically play on thier own. I know where your coming from. I used to give my kid toys and tell him that now momy is resting/cooking or whatever and now you need to play alone. the more you do it the more they get the message and learn to do things on thier own. if you give in to them they will learn to do whatever it takes to get you to give them what they want. you need to make a time and tell him now mommy will play with you. and now mommy will cook and dont give in once or you will have to start all over again. its called being assertive we do it with the pp around us . we teach pp how to behave to us by what we tell them we need and act on it. if you need a shower you make sure whoever it is around you knows not to bother you for that amount of time.

mam

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 6:57 pm

I fulley understand you I tried that way poster before said did not work I did play therapy help alot still wants naiber to come play

amother

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 10:38 pm

op here
the problem is is that he was never interested in toys
I give him a bunch of options to play with and he isn't interested in any of them. they are all age appropriate toys
he vetoes all options and then walks around the house and tries to climb and get things that he shouldn't and I have to try to make sure that he doesn't break things

justforfun87

Thu, Jan 22 2015, 11:47 pm

Sorry to disappoint you but he sounds like a toddler. I always joke that I have no clue why I waste money on toys when my son just plays with non toy objects. Arrange for playdates.

Ruchel

Fri, Jan 23 2015, 5:15 am

Sorry, mom doesn't have time now. You can watch me or go play with xyz.

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