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Forum -> Relationships -> Manners & Etiquette
Non frum neighbor shoveled our walk on Shabbos



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imasinger




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Jan 24 2015, 8:28 pm
On his own initiative, of course. It was very sweet of him. My first thought was to send a small gift and thank you, but I don't want to tacitly encourage a Jew to do work for us on Shabbos. What are the right words to tell them we are very touched by his gesture, but he really shouldn't? Or shoule we just shut up and say thank you? WWYD?
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singleagain




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Jan 24 2015, 8:38 pm
how well do you know the neighbor? like do you know him well enough that you know if he wouldn't be insulted if you explained why you wouldn't want him to help on shabbat, then maybe explain.

otherwise, I would think thank him, but let him know that he doesn't have to do something like, that, and maybe offer to return the favor in a small way, like collecting his mail if he goes on vacation
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LoveMy2Kids




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Jan 24 2015, 8:40 pm
It's interesting, because our non-jewish neighbor shoveled us out as well. Our Rav said even that is not so pashut that we're allowed to let him. I have to clarify the final verdict.
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morah




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Jan 24 2015, 8:45 pm
I would thank him, and then say he should be aware that while you couldn't have done it on Shabbos, since it ends pretty early, you'd have gotten to it by 6 pm, and he needn't trouble himself next time because you will take care of it.
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cbg




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 25 2015, 9:03 am
Maybe you can invite him for a Shabbat meal for him to experience.
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Scrabble123




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 25 2015, 10:01 am
LoveMy2Kids wrote:
It's interesting, because our non-jewish neighbor shoveled us out as well. Our Rav said even that is not so pashut that we're allowed to let him. I have to clarify the final verdict.


A non Jew doing something on their own accord is totally different than a non religious Jew....

I would probably go along with what a few posters have posted and thank him, but explain that it was in no way expected and that I would have gotten to it later (and in fact enjoying shoveling as the best exercise.. or something to that effect: We're trying to teach our children responsibility by having them shovel, etc. etc.). I would also probably discuss it with a daas Torah for both curiosity and practicality.
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jan 25 2015, 10:35 am
Send him some cookies & say thank-you.

If he's jewish he knows it was shabbos & thought he was helping out [oopsie].

If he's not jewish then I would add sorry I couldn't get to it sooner because of the sabbath. This way he knows you weren't neglecting your neighborhood & that you would have gotten to it later. [something he probably already knows since you're neighbors]
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