Help-Toddler non-stop ruin dd5 games

newmom770

Tue, Feb 24 2015, 6:18 am

My toddler dd who is almost 2 yrs old is constantly ruining what my 5 yr old dd is playing with which is usually a dollhouse and mentchies. (My toddler is a sturdy strong build while dd is petite and quite weak.) The toddler grabs the mentchies and/or knocks over the set up. If my dd is playing with a regular doll, the toddler will try to grab it, and cry that its hers. Basically my dd cant play in peace.
We actually have two dollhouses but giving the toddler one of the dollhouse with some mentchies doesnt help for more than a couple of minutes after which she runs to ruin and grab what dd is playing with.
I cant hold a yelling toddler for two hours straight so that dd can play. Putting dollhouse on table doesnt help, toddler climbs on chair and reaches. Dd doesnt want to play in her room, she wants to be downstairs with everyone else. (The downstairs is open plan so no rooms to go and close door. )
I was looking at playpens, but most have space for toddler to stick her hand in and keep grabbing. Besides that it will take up half the small amount of space we have.
So, any ideas???

imaima

Tue, Feb 24 2015, 6:32 am

As one rebetzen told me, "There were years in our house, when we didn't play any games."

I try to have older kids play their games when he younger one is napping. Or have someone else entertain one batch of kids while I am busy with the other batch.

that's the only thing that works for me.

Tue, Feb 24 2015, 6:48 am

The toddler is probably in the stage of her life where she is beginning to want to play with other children, not alongside them. Any attempt of separating them causes tantrums. How about a game that is intended for both ages, like trouble, this way they play together. And of course, both will need some guidance so they can actually enjoy their game, so you will need to play with them for the first few times.

chani8

Tue, Feb 24 2015, 7:12 am

You need a toddler safe play area, or a big kid play area, whichever works for you. Use half walls or child safety gates to block off areas in your house. You must provide a way to separate these two. It's not good for their relationship to have this potential war between them. Certainly respect your older child's need to play in peace.

animeme

Tue, Feb 24 2015, 7:43 am

Re. Games, trouble and many board games are choking hazards and below a toddler's ability, though I strongly suggest games like The Cat in the Hat game that are fun and silly and educational and gross motor.

I agree with Chani; it's worth a try to gate off an area. I do know, though, that there are toddlers for whom gates are only momentary obstacles. Aside from climbing, they will yell and throw things. Op, Dd may need to decide if she wants to play safely in her room or at peril on the main level. Maybe provide a special treat of playing in mommy and daddy's room?

miami85

Tue, Feb 24 2015, 9:55 am

A couple of possibilities, does the toddler still nap? Can the 5 year-old play with them when s/he's napping?

Can you get a room divider gate that would allow separate play areas for the 2 kids--I've heard of families doing this when an older child wants to play with small legos and there's a toddler in the house.

I agree, you may need to inform your daughter of the choice of play in your room or toddler will reck your game--and she'll have to abide by the consequences of her choices.

Another suggestion, which I've heard of, is getting a pack n' play (mesh sides--no one can stick anything through) and perhaps older child can play in it in peace

Another possibility, is have DD play at the table, and every time 2y/o climbs up, don't yell or scold just say "not for you." It may take 10-30 times of doing this, but eventually I think the 2 y/o will give up and find something else to play with, and within short order and it may result in a tantrum or 2,3, or 4, but in the long run I think your daughter will get the space she needs--as well as the satisfaction that you are respecting her needs to play and not just giving in to the toddler all the time.

Finally, remember that this is a phase, and within 6 months your 2 year old will have much more sophisticated play skills and won't wreak as much havoc with your 5 y/o. Hang in there.

21young

Tue, Feb 24 2015, 10:38 am

I currently have this issue with my 4 year old and 1.5 year old, and my solution has been pretty successful.
I did 2 things:
1. My 4 year old knows that certain toys are only for playing in his bedroom with the door closed, so that baby can't get to it. He knows that if he leaves the door open baby will get to it, and I take no responsibility. With that said, I allow him to keep his elaborately constructed cities standing from week to week because this way he feels that he has a safe space.
2. I bought this: http://www.walmart.com/ip/Even.....25875
When he's playing nicely with a floor puzzle or something of the sort we put up the gate and it works beautifully.

amother

Tue, Feb 24 2015, 5:15 pm

I have an extra counter in my playroom that my 4 year old plays on when he doesn't want his baby brother to bother him. Its carpeted in there so he cant get hurt even when he jumps off it. Confused

It is high enough that baby can't reach.

Mommastuff

Wed, Feb 25 2015, 10:25 am

I have the same problem!!
Some solutions I tried were mentioned but here's another:

give your 5 yr old a baby toy(s) within reach so when the toddler reaches for the big kids toy, have the big kid hand the toddler their own toy instead. You may need a few toys to get a block of undisturbed playing time.