Too much noise outside at bedtime

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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Toddlers

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amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 7:22 pm

What to do?!
The weather is getting nice again. Horray!
We switched the clocks so it's getting dark later, more time to play outside. Horray!
The neighborhood boys take advantage of the weather and daylight, and play right outside my kids bedroom window.
The kids have been trying to go to sleep since six o'clock, and keep getting woken up by the yelling. It's getting dark already, so it's quieting down, but it will be noisy later and later as the day gets longer.

I've been trying to brainstorm my options, and would like some input from the wise imamother community.

Speak to parents: no, because this is the biggest area for boys to run, and playing across the street won't help much. Also, even if parents tell them to tone it down, boys will be boys...

Close the window: no, my children will suffocate. We even keep windows open in winter-it is so hot.

Put kids in for naps when they come home, and then let them play outside when they wake up until nightfall. - so far my only feasible option. I don't like it for selfish and personal reasons. I need my space at night. Still, if this is the only option, so it will be.

Last option: somehow get my kids to fall asleep in the noise- I wish!!! I think it's wishful thinking. Older child is very sensitive to noise.

So what do you think?

animeme

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 7:54 pm

A fan in their room. Leave the window open until bedtime, then close it and turn on the fan, then open the window again after dark.

Any chance your kids have a harder time falling asleep when its light outside, even without noise?

SingALong

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 8:00 pm

Ever tried a white noise machine? It works great for my son who's room is right off the foyer. I don't even have a real one just use my humidifier with no water

amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 8:08 pm

So after talking with my husband. We decided to keep the bedtime, but speak to the kids at bedtime, and ask them to go play somewhere else.
If they don't listen, speak to parents.
If still a problem speak to rav, etc.

Basically, follow chain of command...

amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 8:12 pm

animeme wrote:

That won't work because they won't fall asleep because they won't be able to breath.
Also, the light is not an issue. They go down for naps without a problem.

amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 8:15 pm

SingALong wrote:

Ever tried a white noise machine? It works great for my son who's room is right off the foyer. I don't even have a real one just use my humidifier with no water

White noise machines and too much noise in general when the brain is developing have been associated with auditory processing disorders and learning disabilities. I can't source for you right now, but if you study neurological and childhood development, you will come across this mode of thought. I would rather not go there, if you know what I mean.

amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 8:19 pm

If u don't own the property outside ur kids room, you can't ask the kids to leave.....
My kids room is also in a noisy area, they sleep with a white noise machine & I put room darkeners. Bh the fall asleep fine.

amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 8:44 pm

amother wrote:

What about noise disturbances? Isn't that something I'm technically allowed to call the cops for? Doesn't that mean that I can ask them nicely to play somewhere else?

amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 8:46 pm

amother wrote:

What about noise disturbances? Isn't that something I'm technically allowed to call the cops for? Doesn't that mean that I can ask them nicely to play somewhere else?

No not before ten or eleven at night

amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 9:09 pm

amother wrote:

No not before ten or eleven at night

I'm in nyc. I just called 311, and they said that if it is disturbing quality of life, I can make a noise complaint any time of day.

busydev

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 9:11 pm

what about putting a fan in the window so you have an open window and the noise to mask the outside noise?

amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 9:23 pm

Why can't parents teach their kids to be considerate of others? Isn't that the first thing we are supposed to teach our kids?
דרך ארץ קדמה לתורה

This is my husband's premise. He wants me to say something. He says I am obligated, because nobody else will speak up for our children, and I am not allowed to let them suffer in this way. (Older child gets sick for a couple of days after one or two nights of going to sleep late).
Based on everyone here online, it seems like majority says otherwise.
Why?

Notsobusy

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 9:33 pm

One reason why they may be having a harder time falling asleep is because their internal clocks still think it's 5p not 6p. You may have to adjust them slowly, over a few nights, to get them used to the time change.

As far as parents teaching their kids to be considerate, I'm sure they have no idea you're trying to put your kids to sleep and that they're keeping them up. If you haven't said anything to them, how do you expect them to know?

busydev

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 9:33 pm

you can talk to them.... but chances are that kids will be kids and you cant expect them to only play inside from 6pm! so we are giving you practical solutions in addition to talking nicely to the parents. and the cops will laugh you off.

amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 9:37 pm

glutenless wrote:

The kids are exhausted by the time six o'clock rolls around. They are about to doze off and then someone yells, and child cries, rinse and repeat.
So then it is ok to approach them? They won't look at us as starting problems?
I'm so confused.

amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 9:41 pm

amother wrote:

Why does your apartment get so hot that they can't breath for an hour if the window is closed? If it was my boys that was playing outside at a normal time after a long day in school and someone asked me to keep my boys noise level down, I'll ask them to try, but you can't have the world bend to your schedule. You have to think of a compromise. Try to fix the heat problem in the house, it's not normal not to be able to close a window in a house because it gets too hot, even with a fan. (Or please explain......)
If you call the cops, they'll come and then what? Your not going to be very popular. Figure out a way without involving outsiders, and without asking people not to play outside at a normal hour. It's not fair to them.
(I had a neighbor who expected everyone to bend to her rules and it was very annoying and hard, so maybe I'm completely wrong here but it hit a nerve here, so I'm sorry)

amother

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 9:42 pm

busydev wrote:

Yes, but they can play under their own window. They can go to a playground. They can think of other solutions. If it was my kid yelling in the street at any time, I would not allow said child to play outside for the rest of the day.
Being a child does not mean no consideration.

The Happy Wife

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 9:43 pm

Can you adjust the heat do that it's not as hot and you can close the windows? I don't think it's fair to complain about outside noise while your windows are open.
Maybe you can play a tape/cd while the kids are falling asleep, and hopefully the kids outside will finish playing by the time the tape ends.

MagentaYenta

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 9:44 pm

busydev wrote:

This is so true. I was looking forward to hearing my neighbors kids outside after school today and this evening. The weather is beautiful and they have an extra hour of daylight. My neighborhood is rather alive at 6:45 pm, it's evident that I'm not the only person who will be dining out of doors this evening.

I'm sorry this is rough on others but 6pm is a rather early bedtime in this part of the world.

Kumphort

Mon, Mar 09 2015, 9:45 pm

I think you are best off trying some of the above suggestions. Today was the first nice day outside and it was the first full day of the new time change which messed up everyones schedule. My big kids are only getting home at 6 PM. That's very early to expect ppl to be quiet outside. You can try and ask people not to play right under your windows but most likely it will just become frustrating for you. The fact that you conplained about the heat makes me think that you are living in an apt or some other type of housing with a lot of people around and not your own property.
I think you should try some white noise or somerhjbg else just for the half hour or so until the kids fall into a deep sleep hopefully by then it will be quieter and you can turn it off

I think by starting up with the neighbors without doing anything on your part first is Just going to lead to frustration on your part

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