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Forum -> Yom Tov / Holidays -> Pesach
Too much hired help?!
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Thu, Mar 26 2015, 5:49 pm
Sounds nuts, but I have alot of cleaning help. I would want to manage with less but I'm so used to her that I can't manage without her. I'm starting to feel like those pple that I used to make fun of, y 'know the kind that had full time help doing their whole house for pesach uch I hate it but I'm just getting lazier by the day.
Question is:
Would you have minimal amount of help even if you could afford to have more? Rolling Eyes
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mummiedearest




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 26 2015, 6:37 pm
yes, I have minimal amount. I can probably afford more. and yes, I'm lazier than I was before I got the minimal help. I resist hiring more help because it makes me feel kinda useless. I feel accomplished when I keep my house clean on my own. maybe I'm weird.
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amother
Vermilion


 

Post Thu, Mar 26 2015, 6:38 pm
amother wrote:
Sounds nuts, but I have alot of cleaning help. I would want to manage with less but I'm so used to her that I can't manage without her. I'm starting to feel like those pple that I used to make fun of, y 'know the kind that had full time help doing their whole house for pesach uch I hate it but I'm just getting lazier by the day.
Question is:
Would you have minimal amount of help even if you could afford to have more? Rolling Eyes


I have too much help also. I hate it. I never have privacy when they are there and they don't do things my way. I could have help 6 days a week and instead take it for half that time. Too much help and they are not efficient.
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Thu, Mar 26 2015, 6:48 pm
mummiedearest wrote:
yes, I have minimal amount. I can probably afford more. and yes, I'm lazier than I was before I got the minimal help. I resist hiring more help because it makes me feel kinda useless. I feel accomplished when I keep my house clean on my own. maybe I'm weird.

Your not weird, that's exactly what I would WANT to do but I just can't carry through, I just get so lazy Sad
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Frumdoc




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 26 2015, 7:27 pm
Depends what you do with the time you save not cleaning/ doing housework.

If you do important or valuable work, whether that is paid, chesed, or childcare, or whatever, then why not get someone else to clean? That isn't exactly lazy, just prioritizing.

Although I can't imagine having your entire Pesach prep done by someone else without you direct supervision at a minimum, but each to their own.
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zaq




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 26 2015, 7:56 pm
When you hire help you are enabling someone else to make an honest living. So long as you pay them fairly and treat them with respect, it's all good.
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 26 2015, 8:23 pm
After Pesach, take note of some things. See what kind of things you leave for your cleaning help. What is your house like in between. Are things really slobby, or do you straighten up, do dishes, etc.? I was in an oot friend's house once (by oot I mean oo MY town Wink ) and it was...interesting to see how she lives. I wonder if and how she's been able to train her kids to pick up after themselves, make their beds, etc.

Don't get emotional about it. Don't tell yourself toxic messages like I'm spoiled, a baby, hopeless, whatever. If you see some things that don't get done between the cleaning help that you really could be doing without added stress, do it. You may find that you can cut down an hour or so easily just that way.

Oh, and if you spend a good chunk of your extra time doing good things, kol hakavod! I worry that the next generation isn't going to have the kind of volunteer backbone that we still manage to have now. If you are doing these kinds of things, please keep it up, and keep as much help as you need to keep your life running smoothly, if you can well afford it.
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Thu, Mar 26 2015, 9:18 pm
Thanks pink fridge, you made me feel alot better. Seems like you know how I tick.
At one point this year, I didn't have any help for a few months, it was quite stressful but we managed .My kids and my dh helped alot.
After pesach I will definitely not have her as much as now.
Yes I do volunteer,and im having a very stressful pregnancy, (emotionally and physically)so I do take it easy. I would not be able to do it if I wouldn't have the help.I know I should rather keep house but I really don't enjoy it . I get alot more satisfaction doing for others and at the end of the day my things get done anyway.
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PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 26 2015, 9:28 pm
If you're able to, take care of yourself. It sounds like a real priority now. (And I said after Pesach without even knowing about your pregnancy.)
I guess a good litmus test is to see how your kids operate. Do they make their beds, hang up their coats, wash their dishes or put them in the sink/dishwasher, just basic skills and seder practices? Then, a bit beyond that: can they clean up their own messes, spills, etc.? What do they do lekavod Shabbos?
You should have a few goals:
- your future children in law will thank you
- that certain things don't seem a chore or taking out extra chunks of their time but routine, like brushing their teeth. Folding a few towels shouldn't be a big deal. It's good for their neshamos.

OK, no more time online, back on my head. I really just went on line to check out a Pesach-related line. (Yeah yeah, that's what they all say.)
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amother
Coral


 

Post Thu, Mar 26 2015, 11:06 pm
my cleaning help is doing all the pesach cleaning for me.
seriously all of it.
twice I had to redo something she hadnt done well, and I think thats all the cleaning I did so far.

that bit reminded me why I hire cleaning help instead of doing it all myself. I got so wiped out from the cleaning I did, that its just not worth it. figuring out what to tell her to clean and when to do it is already a job. thats my job. I wouldnt say I dont clean for pesach. I just dont do the physical labor. I just cant. I'm not spoiled, or a baby or anything. I am very grateful that we can afford the help so that I dont have to exhaust myself cleaning. I feel normal and happy going into pesach, and thats the important thing.
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bluebird




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Mar 26 2015, 11:37 pm
Do what you need to do. As long as you are treating your cleaners well you have nothing to feel guilty about. We all need help sometimes. Sometimes a lot, sometimes a little.
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imasoftov




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 27 2015, 8:05 am
Hire a household manager and let that person lay off excess staff.
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imaima




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 27 2015, 8:14 am
amother wrote:
Sounds nuts, but I have alot of cleaning help. I would want to manage with less but I'm so used to her that I can't manage without her. I'm starting to feel like those pple that I used to make fun of, y 'know the kind that had full time help doing their whole house for pesach uch I hate it but I'm just getting lazier by the day.
Question is:
Would you have minimal amount of help even if you could afford to have more? Rolling Eyes


I would and I do. I see that my cleaning help does a lot of unnecessary things because I have no time to supervise her. It is more efficient when I give her very specific tasks and manage the rest myself.

I used to have a cleaner who was more intuitive about it, she just always did the right thing. And this one can spend hours wiping spice jars when I told her to clean out the fridge.
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nyer1




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 27 2015, 8:16 am
there are certain things that I feel I need to do in a particular way, so I feel silly hiring someone and having to explain and show her what to do when clearly I should just do it myself. could definitely afford more help but I'm managing fine with just the help I have now. plus my hubby is super helpful
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imaima




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 27 2015, 8:26 am
WHile we are at it: how do you get your cleaner to do the laundry? Does she know what belongs to which child? I have kids close in age, and if they are wearing plain white undershirts, she won't be able to recognize what belongs to whom and put it away accordingly. Like, a boys and a girls undershirt are almost the same, there is a little bow on the girl's and it is one size smaller, but the cleaner has no idea and she overlooks these things.
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Fri, Mar 27 2015, 9:04 am
By now she knows where things belong,and she's neat. If the undershirts are so similar that the lady cant tell them apart (besides the little bow thing)why make a big deal if one child wears the others.most of my kids are quite close in age and sometimes they will share.

Regarding ruining stuff, most of the kids things are not expensive,and I heard from a machaneches that$ 100 worth of damage a year is definitely worth a calmer home. I try to remember that.
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amother
Olive


 

Post Fri, Mar 27 2015, 11:18 am
Wow such problems! How many hours of cleaning help a week are we talking here? And how much per hour?
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kollel wife




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 27 2015, 11:31 am
Even if they close in age and stuff is similar, you can end up with no undershirts in one child's drawer and a lot in the other.

The best way is to label inside with a colored thread or a dot of permanent marker or puff paint.
You can put the puff paint on the bottom of a sock.

You can then make your cleaner a chart, what color belongs to who.
Also, I read a great idea maybe it was on this site.

If you have a few kids in a row and will hand things down.
The oldest gets one dot, the next two, etc.
So when that garment gets passed down, you don't have to try to remove the color, etc. You just add another dot!!
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amother
Forestgreen


 

Post Fri, Mar 27 2015, 11:33 am
I just rechecked my post and I don't see anywhere that I wrote about having a problem Rolling Eyes
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Raisin




 
 
    
 

Post Fri, Mar 27 2015, 11:39 am
In victorian novels women who had well run homes were called "good managers". Apparently there is an art to managing your help so that they do things properly.

I agree it is important to teach your kids basic household skills.

My cleaning help is not allowed to sort laundry. If she does I end up with my teenage daughters skirts in my wardrobe and my babies shirts in my ten year olds cupboards and my clothes in my husbands cupboard. I ask her repeatedly not to put clothes away. I fold and sort laundry myself but stuff that is hanging to dry she will take and put away...sometimes getting it right, sometimes not. I do leave her sheets, towels etc to fold and put away. The half hour she might save me by putting clothes away is not worth losing an hour shabbos morning because I can't find my kids clothes.

There is plenty of housework for her to do otherwise.
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