Stealing cleaning help from someone else

cbg

Wed, Apr 08 2015, 4:07 pm

amother wrote:

Really? I couldn't figure that out! What a typical response.

I expect most cleaning women to go where the money is. So if someone is offering more...

I do expect a woman who is shomer Torah u'mitzvos -- which includes btw caring about your fellow Jew-- to think when she is bribing her cleaning woman how it might impact the other frum family.

Does this other lady know you have her on Thursdays,
Or did she just ask the cleaning are you available and the cleaning lady said yes. This is what happened to me. I have my cleaning lady MWF,but when I ask for extra days she always says yes.

Ashrei

Wed, Apr 08 2015, 5:57 pm

Don't forget dan l'kaf zechus...

What if the "other lady" has a severly disabled child among other small children and no family whatsoever? What if she doesn't have the money to employ the cleaning lady full time, but saves up to have her a little extra before Pesach? Maybe she counts on her even more than you?

I am actually similar to the "other lady" I described above. Hashem stole my cleaning lady for a few much needed hours each day before Pesach, including erev yontif! It made things very hard! But when I said Hashem stole her, I mean it. She had to be out because her brother is in the hospital in very serious condition, and her granddaughter (7 months!) was hospitalized also! (She's totally telling the truth, I've known her about 7 years, I know her family, etc etc... no question of trust here.) She was a mess the other days she was working.

(B'h her granddaughter is better and her brother was transferred, but her brother still doesn't look so good.)

In this situation it was clearly Hashem who timed this to give me the extra aggravation (okay, 'challenges') before yontif.

But isn't it always from Hashem?

debsey

Wed, Apr 08 2015, 6:25 pm

Ashrei wrote:

Hugs -your situation sounds challenging. Still, it doesn't sound like YOU poached someone else's cleaning help.

I just want to point out that the fact that everything is from Hashem does not preclude each individual's obligation to act ethically.

Chana Miriam S

Wed, Apr 08 2015, 6:58 pm

amother wrote:

really? Seriously? I consider my cleaning ladies primary responsibility to be with the person who told me about her since she has her for more hours than me.

I know I would prioritize my customers according to what I am doing for them. Yes, a regular customer is going to get more perks than people who use me less so to speak.

Sure you are a regular customer too, but given that she is roughly three times more regular than you are, I know that if I were your cleaning lady I would be inclined to do more for the hand that is feeding me more.

That said, I would not change plans without telling you and I generally honour a commitment made first BUT as a caterer I often lose staff to better paying gigs because kitchen time versus serving time is less well paid. It is what it is. If I am not willing to pony up and pay serving rates, boo hoo for me. It's all about money and people who work for me or work as cleaners generally don't have much. How can you begrudge them for wanting more?

Meanwhile, betting the other lady has no idea that you were inconvenienced in any way.

Chana Miriam S

Wed, Apr 08 2015, 9:49 pm

amother wrote:

I am indeed going to find someone new. And yes, such is life. I hope you never get the bitter taste of it. Glad to see how much you care about others. Great attitude!

That's the way to go! Good for you! Take action! But what did oo do wrong to deserve your sarcasm? She is right?!?!

amother

Cobalt

Thu, Apr 09 2015, 3:49 am

Sometimes cleaning ladies prefer to work in the house that is less work.

My cleaning ladies will always prefer to work for me especially pre-pesach. Pre-pesach the cleaning ladies are abused being expected to clean up dirt and grime accumulated for a year. It is disgusting some of the stories I read about finding food in couches, etc. I would prefer to work in a house that is kept clean.

FranticFrummie

Thu, Apr 09 2015, 3:58 am

amother wrote:

I agree. I only have cleaning help the weeks before Pesach, and I offered to pay $20 an hour instead of $15, right off the bat. I did NOT want to risk losing my help to anyone! I knew she was doing occasional cleaning for other people at the lower rate, but I also knew that my Pesach cleaning was going to be more intense (grubby) than the average weekly cleaning job.

Bottom line, you get what you pay for.

debsey

Thu, Apr 09 2015, 8:45 am

momspower wrote:

My sister found this amazing cleaning lady so she gives her to me a few hours to fill up those holes when she doesn't need her because she is sooo scared she will leave her...

right - so when you employ someone for more hours than you need, solely because you want to retain her for Pesach, and then someone poaches her just for that week!

Talya

Thu, Apr 09 2015, 9:17 am

Ashrei wrote:

I don't think it's ever someones right to decide they need it more than the next person. They may be right in thinking that but they may be very wrong and it's not right for them to make the final call. How would you feel if you found out the person someone in such a situation poached from had a sick husband and kids and was running to and from the hospital but didn't want the public to know? Still think the poacher needed it more?