My child is driving me nuts!!!!!

amother

Apricot

Fri, Apr 17 2015, 5:48 am

Hi everyone. I came on imamother today to post my sob story, and I see so many of you have your own. I am also at my wits end with my child. So many things you all post I have felt or experienced. I read in another post where a mother said her kid is going down in flames and taking the rest of the family with him. I so get it. I feel terribly for my other children, I feel like he is ruining their childhoods. The older ones who are a little more independent and able to get out are at their friends' homes as much as possible.

I actually am wondering if I need to find my 12 yr old son another place to live because he is so difficult and ruining the family dynamic. he has an ADHD diagnosis and he is totally oppositional. He also just acts weirdly! Telling funny little weird jokes and weird laughs. He gets made fun of in school for his behavior and that just makes everything worse. We are on an all natural sugar-free diet and he's on meds but I actually think the meds are making him act weird(er). His teachers are at their wits' end. I am even thinking they won't admit him to school next year.

I'm so sad. every day is misery. We are doing our best but I honestly don't know how to help my child anymore. I feel like he looks for/creates confrontation. Someone professional once told me that kids with ADHD create these dramas because it gives their bodies the adreneline rushes that they want. He won't listen and is defiant. Last night he was acting up and refusing to go to his room (where we asked him to go to take a break). This morning he was swinging the yo-yo around and almost whacking people several times and my husband asked him to give him the yo-yo, and he just said no. And I had to physically restrain him and take the yo-yo away. Every day is crazy drama and we are all miserable in our home.

The other day he was being rude to me and I gently told him, "I don't know if you realize this, but you are being rude." and he said, "I DO realize it and I'm being rude to you on purpose." (!!!!) When he is called out for his bad behavior, he blames others. Nothing is ever his fault, he doesn't take personal responsibility.

We have a therapist and psychiatrist on board but I don't know what else to do or where to turn. I'm just sad and miserable and my whole family is negatively affected. He has a brother who is slightly younger and they fight like madmen, physically and verbally, and this is also driving me/us all crazy. I am scared for the man he is going to become - I feel like he is destined for jail or an asylum with his crazy behavior!

I feel so very sad and empty. I wish all you other mothers who are suffering with your difficult child(ren) could give me a big hug, and I would give you a big hug back.

Crying

amother

Powderblue

Fri, Apr 17 2015, 6:01 am

I dont have an answer for you. I just wanted to give you support. I have a child with ADHD and he is my eldest. He takes up about 90% of my time with me reminding him to do things, or not do them, etc... I have several other children all close in age to him. But a few things. With time, he has become much much less hyper. He is still very impulsive, but the hyperactivity is way down. I also try to remind myself. Okay - he is kind and sweet and caring. He, thank goodness, has never been mean to other children (siblings aside) and is extremely polite. When I get a compliment from another person I want to kiss them, because we went through so many years of only negativity from schools.

Make sure he has lots of physical activity and that he is eating enough actual food. Also, yes, meds can make things worse. My son has been on and off meds for years and certain meds made things worse and gave him anger issues.

One foot in the front of the other is hat I tell myself. And I tell my son that our goal is to make him a great adult and that is why we spend so much time teaching him how to behave.