Terrible behavior in K5

amother

Bronze

Tue, Apr 28 2015, 5:26 am

I've wrote about it before. My DD is in K5 and this year has evolved into a disaster. She is poorly behaved and impulsive with the secular teacher. She wines, cries, throws things when she is frustrated, impatient or she perceives being slighted by one of her friends. She seems to be just fine usually in Judaics though lately her behavior is even creeping into there. She has secular in the morning and Judaics in the afternoon. We've had meetings with staff and school psychologist. The feeling is she is expressing her frustration with the difficulty of the work. To me, that just doesn't make sense. They have standardized tests and she either did average or below average. I'm told those tests don't accurately reflect a K5er though. She is the baby in our family so I do think there is an element of being spoiled. They tried to instill a behavior chart so that if she does not do well in a period she gets graded a 1 but if she does great she gets the max score of 3. Pretty soon she was coming home with virtually all 1's and saying she is "just bad". So then they began rewarding her for the "good behavior" by recognizing and giving her a "ticket". When she is too bad, they take her out of her room and she gets a "time out" and gets to sit with a teacher.

To me, she has figured out a system. She can basically do whatever she wants and the consequences she gets don't bother her. She has learned this and is worse.

She has no problem with going to school. She is happy walking in. She doesn't fret about it. She plays school at home. She loves to practice reading and "teaching" her dolls.

Sometimes her behavior is similar at home. She is sent for a time out usually. This only gets her away from us but the time out doesn't actually stop her from her behavior in the future. We've rewarded her for good behavior in the past by allowing her play dates, sleep overs, etc. Other than time outs and not rewarding her for bad behavior, she has no other consequences.

I feel like she will be perpetually deprived of a childhood if we just continually take things away from her. She'll end up in her room with no play dates every day.

What are we supposed to do?