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Forum
-> Inquiries & Offers
-> Moving/ Relocating
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amother
Pearl
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 Mon, May 18 2015, 9:10 am
For whatever reason, Dh and I have to move to Lakewood. We are looking for a warm, accepting, chilled community, on the younger side. An area with detached houses. Not rain tree.
We don't want a ritzy Flatbush type crowd, nor do we want ultra yeshivish/heimish. I want to be able to wear colored nail polish, Dh colored shirts, wear jean skirts, cover my hair all the way (no hair showing in front when wearing a fall or a snood etc), without feeling like an outcast for being too frum or not frum enough. Also, what sort of school (elementary) can we send our kids (girls and boys) to? Again, not too ritzy but not too frum. Thanks for ur ideas...
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amother
Cobalt
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Mon, May 18 2015, 9:18 am
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cookiecutter
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Mon, May 18 2015, 9:39 am
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Raintree is the closest to what you've described. Why not Raintree?
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amother
Pearl
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Mon, May 18 2015, 9:49 am
| cookiecutter wrote: | | Raintree is the closest to what you've described. Why not Raintree? |
We are looking for new construction. Also, do people rent out basements in raintree? Ideally we would like to be able to rent out a basement.
To the amother who suggested chestnut: I have heard that it is more of a Flatbush type community. Would you say that is true?
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naturalmom5
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Mon, May 18 2015, 9:56 am
OP I'm looking for a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow
Thanks for the laugh
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summer0808
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Mon, May 18 2015, 10:10 am
Just food for thought. the chilled are usually in the older houses not new construction. So say Raintree has some new construction going up. The general neighborhood will be chilled but your block will probably be a little more ritzy.
you may have to buy a property and put up a house. For that I would rent first in the neighborhood and see if it's really what you're looking for and then build nearby.
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amother
Mauve
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Mon, May 18 2015, 11:09 am
I'm sure you know, but please please look into schools before homes. Hopefully, it will go easy for your family, but it can get a little crazy unfortunately and it would be a pity to have that color your initial experience here. As everywhere, there are problems (life!) but there are wonderful things in Lakewood and its best to go in with eyes wide open. good luck! we're still looking for the same kind of community you describe so when you find it, give us a shout out here! 
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debsey
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Mon, May 18 2015, 12:05 pm
New England village is very accepting and welcoming. Raintree does sound best for you. Neither are new construction, but you could buy a cheap "knockdown" in raintree and build the house of ur dreams.
Aalso, what about Albert? The crowd there is very mixed.
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debsey
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Mon, May 18 2015, 12:06 pm
| amother wrote: | We are looking for new construction. Also, do people rent out basements in raintree? Ideally we would like to be able to rent out a basement.
To the amother who suggested chestnut: I have heard that it is more of a Flatbush type community. Would you say that is true? | yes. Chestnut is the "Flatbush" of lakewood.
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amother
Pearl
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Mon, May 18 2015, 12:12 pm
| debsey wrote: | New England village is very accepting and welcoming. Raintree does sound best for you. Neither are new construction, but you could buy a cheap "knockdown" in raintree and build the house of ur dreams.
Aalso, what about Albert? The crowd there is very mixed. |
Is Albert in Raintree? Always thought that was the case. If not, where is it?
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amother
Pearl
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Mon, May 18 2015, 12:13 pm
Do people who built new houses in raintree rent out their basements? Are basements in raintree in demand or is it too far out to be attractive?
Is it a safe neighborhood? Are there sidewalks, and is it safe to go walking/jogging outdoors, and for kids to play outside?
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amother
Jade
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Mon, May 18 2015, 12:17 pm
Raintree is awesome, I live there 
It sounds like everything you're looking for, except the new construction and basement part. There are a couple of new cul-de-sacs that are going up sometime in the near future, but like other posters said, the new construction crowd may not be the same as the typical Raintree crowd. And even the tear-downs are getting pretty expensive... and I only know one person who has a rentable basement outside of the new construction. It is very uncommon here.
I wouldn't call Chestnut "the Flatbush of Lakewood," but it does have many "Lakewood rebel" types and it can be fancier. Not sure, I never lived there, but I know a few people who do and they are definitely not Flatbushy.
Check out New England Village and Albert, too. There is some new construction in the Albert area.
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Notsobusy
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Mon, May 18 2015, 12:19 pm
| debsey wrote: | | yes. Chestnut is the "Flatbush" of lakewood. |
Chestnut is like Flatbush in that the people there are generally not yeshivish. But they don't seem to be ritzy to me, at least not the people I know that live there. It sounds like the op doesn't want the ritzy Flatbush type.
I was also going to say New England Village, but as far as I know you can't have basements there.
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amother
Fuchsia
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Mon, May 18 2015, 12:19 pm
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Near Toms River but you may not be able to rent out a basement.
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Notsobusy
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Mon, May 18 2015, 12:21 pm
| amother wrote: | | Is Albert in Raintree? Always thought that was the case. If not, where is it? |
Albert is by Pine and Oak streets.
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amother
White
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Mon, May 18 2015, 11:31 pm
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I live in chestnut and im very frum. dh wears colored shirts too. its kind of mixed here by now. its nice.
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imalady
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Mon, May 18 2015, 11:51 pm
okay not a clue why you want to move to Lakewood but here goes....
You can wear what you want in almost any neighborhood, no one is going to put you in actual cherem. That being said, you will be putting your children in a really difficult position. So long as you stay reasonably close to community standards, it will be fine, but you can't move to roman and live as a greek. It just won't work out well.
I'm a teacher here in town. Let me tell you, I wonder about the parents who do what they did wherever they came from originally and don't realize that their daughters go to school and hear that those things "are just not for a bas yisrael" or a "princess". But the mother is always queen in their eyes and they are left hearing people criticize said wonderful mother. Now what? Can a girl learn from a person who has, albeit unknowingly, put down her mother? Then the parents wonder why the hanhallah of the school isn't reaching their daughter. Its a terrible cycle that could be avoided. You can blame the schools all you want, but "when in Rome do as the Romans" isn't a Lakewood saying. Everyone recognizes its truth.
If you want to move to Lakewood, come move to my block and be my neighbor. My kids will play with yours. Our husbands can - gasp - daven together. His blue shirt, my husbands striped tzitzis, my not cool black skirt and your nail polish. But none of that can negate the damage of sending your children to a school that strongly adheres to different standards than your own. Even agreeing that there isn't a thing wrong with what you do, its too great a gap for many children.
Again, I don't know why you can't live wherever and just live and like your neighbors. (can you tell I'm from OOT) I wouldn't recommend a development as they really don't offer any privacy, but there are builders who already own lots and will build you a house.
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amother
Rose
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Tue, May 19 2015, 5:53 am
| imalady wrote: | okay not a clue why you want to move to Lakewood but here goes....
You can wear what you want in almost any neighborhood, no one is going to put you in actual cherem. That being said, you will be putting your children in a really difficult position. So long as you stay reasonably close to community standards, it will be fine, but you can't move to roman and live as a greek. It just won't work out well.
I'm a teacher here in town. Let me tell you, I wonder about the parents who do what they did wherever they came from originally and don't realize that their daughters go to school and hear that those things "are just not for a bas yisrael" or a "princess". But the mother is always queen in their eyes and they are left hearing people criticize said wonderful mother. Now what? Can a girl learn from a person who has, albeit unknowingly, put down her mother? Then the parents wonder why the hanhallah of the school isn't reaching their daughter. Its a terrible cycle that could be avoided. You can blame the schools all you want, but "when in Rome do as the Romans" isn't a Lakewood saying. Everyone recognizes its truth.
If you want to move to Lakewood, come move to my block and be my neighbor. My kids will play with yours. Our husbands can - gasp - daven together. His blue shirt, my husbands striped tzitzis, my not cool black skirt and your nail polish. But none of that can negate the damage of sending your children to a school that strongly adheres to different standards than your own. Even agreeing that there isn't a thing wrong with what you do, its too great a gap for many children.
Again, I don't know why you can't live wherever and just live and like your neighbors. (can you tell I'm from OOT) I wouldn't recommend a development as they really don't offer any privacy, but there are builders who already own lots and will build you a house. |
I hate to say this but this is in any NY NJ area not just confined to Lakewood. Wouldn't the world be a better place if everyone can do what they please. Dreamland. Stop teaching kids what a bas melech is and a princess for crying out loud and start focusing on middos and happiness. Lakewood isn't the only one with these issues.
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Simple1
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Tue, May 19 2015, 7:58 am
Off topic, Flatbush isn't one community.There are yeshivish people there too, some possibly more yeshivish than your typical Lakewooder who is more materialistic.
Rose amother, NY is more set up with schools of different types. There may be different types in Lakewood but the spectrum is much narrower. You may think that's not ideal, but it is what it is. (I personally love NY for its diversity, it's so interesting.)
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amother
Dodgerblue
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Tue, May 19 2015, 11:26 pm
Lakewood at this point has plenty of schools, and all types. Make sure that you are in a school that is accepting to things that you do. You don't want your child to feel like an outcast, and you don't want the school harassing you.
Once you find a nice school, you will be OK.
There are a lot of nice neighborhoods. Just again, same as school, make sure it's ppl who are on the same page as you, as you don't want to be the 'modern' family on the block that Noone let's their kids come and play by your house. Ppl WILL don't that, and you will be crushed.
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