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Forum -> Parenting our children -> Teenagers and Older children
Do frum teenagers do drugs?
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amother


 

Post Sat, Jun 16 2007, 11:43 pm
I almost freaked out today when shabbos afternnon hatzoloh came looking for a neighbour here...their son was in the ambulance after over-dose of drgus...hasehm!
is it normal?
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timeout




 
 
    
 

Post Sat, Jun 16 2007, 11:47 pm
sadly it does happen but its kept quiet for shidduchim reasons and just plain embarresment.

Also something that should be spoken about more is young girls with issues of anorexia and bulimia
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amother


 

Post Sat, Jun 16 2007, 11:55 pm
I know that its horrible to think that these problems exist in the frum community but they do. The best way to prevent your children from becoming involved in such things is education. Maybe up until now you didnt think you had to talk to your children about drugs. You have to now consider would you rather have the conversation with them or risk a "friend" offering it to them and your kid not being educated enough to say NO
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amother


 

Post Sat, Jun 16 2007, 11:58 pm
its not normal just like its not normal anytime anyone does drugs but of course it happens./ everything and anyting happens everywhere no matter race religion etc
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 17 2007, 3:54 am
no - they are too busy davening ... OF COURSE ... we are all susceptible to the world ... and kids are having a rough time in todays world ... frum people are in denial ... frum people are getting divorced ... frum people are running amok ... frum people are depressed ... and experimental ... it is unfortunate, sad, but true ... very very true ... Sad
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amother


 

Post Sun, Jun 17 2007, 9:25 am
We all live in one big pressure cooker.

We find it hard to admit though. Wink

We're either living with the pressure of inability to pay tuitions or the pressure to keep up with more successful and showy friends and relatives, or somewhere in between or trying our hardest to impress and put pressure on those around us!~.

Pressure to keep up with the Joneses is the cause for much of these problems. Parents who are too be busy to parent their children because of pressures at work or pressure to make a good impresssion on others/ spouse is wrecking our lives................. we live so close to one another, see everything that our neighbors have............ have high rents to pay bec. we newed to live in the same few blocks...........and see some others living on easy street.

The frum community has some advantages in this regard: for instance- Yeshivas to keep our children separate,

and some disadvantages: for instance -need to buy/rent homes in the same small area at astronomical prices).......Marrying off children is more dependent on our financial situation and who you keep company with, than in other circles......... Crying

As much as we try to have Bitachon, and know that Hashem pulls the strings, realistically, it is scary for many.
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greenfire




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 17 2007, 9:29 am
I truly hope that people do not do what they do in order to impress anything to anyone ... but rather to obtain as much good for themselves and their family ... there's a lot more to life than money and things we aquire ... but rather the way we treat one another ... our children especially!!!
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Mrs.Norris




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 17 2007, 1:15 pm
of course they do, just because they are frum they are not immune to everything. From what I've heard (as in first hand information, not heard from a friend who has a friend who has a friend ...) a lot of religious boys smoke pot. I find it quite sad but they don't see the problem in it, they think it's fine and safe. I don't even know what you can do about it, teaching your child that it is bad wont necessarily help, I know my parents never really spoke to us about drugs yet we all made our own decision to never do drugs, I guess we were all pretty level headed but I just pray my kids will be the same.
I also think it's important that you let your kids know they can tell you anything without there being terrible concequences ... I'd rather know my kid smokes weed than not know at least then I could have some sort of control.

As for anorexia, it is definitely something that is not talked about much in the frum world but I think it's important to - even frum girls have issues with their body.
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chocolate moose




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 17 2007, 7:46 pm
That's why ppl overeat, or drink too much, or .....
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yoyosma




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 17 2007, 9:06 pm
Yes, they do.
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amother


 

Post Sun, Jun 17 2007, 9:23 pm
OP, you are really naive. Unfotuantely, its been happening in the frum community for a long time now... are you hiding under a rock?
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DefyGravity




 
 
    
 

Post Sun, Jun 17 2007, 9:26 pm
Drugs are wide-spread everywhere. Frum people are no exception.
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amother


 

Post Tue, Jun 19 2007, 7:39 am
2 of my brothers went thru stages that they did drugs, I think mostly marijuana.
I don't think they were particularly "frum" at that point in their lives, though. Maybe outwardly for my father, but I'm sure they weren't 100 percent shomer shabbat.
Unfortunately, it is a problem. Esp. marijuana. May Hashem help us all!
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Motek




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 20 2007, 5:14 pm
amother wrote:
We're either living with the pressure of inability to pay tuitions or the pressure to keep up with more successful and showy friends and relatives, or somewhere in between or trying our hardest to impress and put pressure on those around us! ...


How are you connecting this to frum teenagers doing drugs? Sounds like more of a reason for the PARENTS to do drugs!
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Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 20 2007, 5:19 pm
^^ ditto

But why keep up with other people? why not use this money to pay tuition for example, or buy things you really need or want?
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DefyGravity




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 20 2007, 5:26 pm
Kids don't need to be troubled in order to do drugs. People might try weed b/c they're curious, like how it feels, and keep doing it. It's no different than people that like to do shots.
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Ruchel




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 20 2007, 5:41 pm
Try maybe... but you need to be troubled to act on the curiosity if you know it is dangerous... and definitely to go on trying again and again... I confess that I have tried other drinks than kiddush wine and I've also tried smoking in my silly teenage years - but I do mean TRY and not did it regularly. And it doesn't compare to hard drugs of course. Anyway when my parents found out the chopped my head off. Which is funny since my dad smoked 10 or 20 years and my mom told me he told her once when he was a teen he got drunk in a café and a guy stole his moto. Hahaha.
Twisted Evil LOL
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BrachaVHatzlocha




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 20 2007, 6:27 pm
I think most (don't know if all) of teens who end up on drugs are ones at risk due to other reasons.
They don't fit into the yeshiva mold, usually. Maybe they can't sit all day, or have learning disabilities, or were just turned off due to other reasons.
Sad
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amother


 

Post Wed, Jun 20 2007, 6:51 pm
unfortunately it is a major issue in almost every community. I have to agree with timeout, anorexia and bulemia are MAJOR issues. as a teacher, it breaks my heart to see these girls... I always pass my observations on to the administration, but it is becoming more and more prevalent. I feel so helpless.
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Mrs.Norris




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Jun 20 2007, 10:03 pm
BrachaVHatzlocha wrote:
I think most (don't know if all) of teens who end up on drugs are ones at risk due to other reasons.
They don't fit into the yeshiva mold, usually. Maybe they can't sit all day, or have learning disabilities, or were just turned off due to other reasons.
Sad

not true at all, as defy said these boys (and sometimes, but more rarely, girls) do it to experiment and see what the fuss is about and the feeling of getting high is addictive. It doesn't mean they are at risk for any reason, marijuana is so readily available these days, it's like saying a frum boy who smokes or drinks alcohol is at risk, it is far too much of a generilastion! Obviously some at risk boys will smoke weed, just like some will have brown hair or wear glasses ... you would be surprised how many frum boys smoke weed.

Ruchel I don't think you need to be troubles at all, if they are told it's fun they will do it and most do not believe it to be dangerous at all.
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