Why was What's App banned?

youngishbear

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 1:48 pm

Jeanette wrote:

I've seen a lot more inappropriate and disturbing things on this website than I've ever seen on whatsapp.

It's one thing to say, I made a choice to use A but not to use B.

It's another to say, I have no use for A and I see no reason why anyone else should either, but I have a need for B and therefore it's okay to use B.

There's also the option of: both A and B have potential dangers, but I have no use for A so I can skip it entirely. I do need B, so I will use that despite its possible downside.

And therefore I am sharing my reasons and choices, so that others can decide the same or otherwise and it makes no difference to me Smile

(except when you post pictures of me without my permission, of course).

Regarding inappropriate messages from groups you can't easily drop out of, that's where I am informing you dear ladies that just because something sounds stupid/illogical/impossible, doesn't mean it doesn't happen. I have seen innocent young people fighting with themselves to do the right thing, hesitating mainly because of complicated family ties.

After seeing that, I adopted a no social media policy (except here - I can't figure out how to post photos anyway, and it's a moderated site that meets my standards.)

youngishbear

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 1:50 pm

kb wrote:

Are you saying that you have family members that are totally appropriate, and would be perfectly fine to email, text, and talk to on a regular basis, but somehow their evil side surfaces when they send out whatsapp messages?? Hard to believe.

I bh wasn't talking about my own family.

And somehow emailing and texting don't have that "audience appeal" that a whatsapp group or social media do.

Jeanette

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 2:42 pm

youngishbear wrote:

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That's great. You have the freedom to think and choose how to use social media appropriately. As should everyone else.

But don't be fooled. Imamother is far from harmless.

Amarante

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 2:46 pm

Jeanette wrote:

.

That's great. You have the freedom to think and choose how to use social media appropriately. As should everyone else.

But don't be fooled. Imamother is far from harmless.

Not sure if you are being somewhat tongue in cheek regarding the "harm" of imamother.

Could you elaborate?

youngishbear

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 2:49 pm

Amarante wrote:

Not sure if you are being somewhat tongue in cheek regarding the "harm" of imamother.

Could you elaborate?

I can imagine the harm, but this is not the kind of harm I choose to protect myself from.

Choices. Lol.

youngishbear

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 2:50 pm

MagentaYenta wrote:

I have two private FB groups one for family and one for friends I've known for over 50 years. I don't use WA but I can see it's appeal for some. I also skype with family and friends.

I love Skype. I wish more of the people I would enjoy skyping with would use it.

Jeanette

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 3:04 pm

Amarante wrote:

Not sure if you are being somewhat tongue in cheek regarding the "harm" of imamother.

Could you elaborate?

No, I'm not being tongue in cheek in the slightest.

I don't know in what circles other people hang out, but the most that goes on in my Whatsapp is people sharing pictures of their kids. I have yet to see an inappropriate image. Everyone posts under their own name. Everyone behaves.

On the other hand, Imamother posts are anonymous. And because of that people let their guard down. And for some reason that makes people think that it is totally appropriate to post extremely private and intimate things in a public forum to be read by thousands of strangers. That to me is very disturbing and perverse. I understand some people are in desperate situations and need support. It is unfortunate that they can't find that support in person, but maybe some of them are just not making an effort. Some people are just venting and it's easier to do it online than to find one trusted person to discuss personal issues with in private.

Not to mention that I suspect that half the threads are started by trolls trying to rile people up. And how hard is it really to get access to imamother posts? Do you have any idea how many men are reading along for kicks?

Raisin

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 4:40 pm

the only issues I have with whatsapp is once or twice I have sent a message to the wrong person or group. And you can't delete it. Once it was to my family group instead of my husband, something about mikva. embarrassed

Otherwise I have no racy whatsapp friends or groups. Either my groups are all women or they are relatives.

Tablepoetry

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 5:27 pm

Raisin wrote:

the only issues I have with whatsapp is once or twice I have sent a message to the wrong person or group. And you can't delete it.

You've got to be really careful about that. It happens to people all the time. Best not to send anything too personal in the first place (easier said than done).

gp2.0

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 5:29 pm

You know what else is funny? Whatsapp requires Internet. Either wifi or a data plan on your phone. So anyone who listened to the original internet/kosher phone bans wouldn't be able to use whatsapp. So who is this directed to? The people who ignored the ban the first time around?

sourstix

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 5:33 pm

there definitely is danger when you dont teach pp how to protect themselves when it comes to internet. that is what is missing. but then there are those who have no self control. and when you ban it from those pp. and they actually listen, then theres good in that. for those who can control themselves([filth]) please learn how to use it wisely. imagine the rabbanim wouldnt comment on internet , texting, we would say oh those rabbanim, they dont get involved in anything. bec of them so many young pp fell in the wrong trap. so whichever way they go they are being criticized. I cant see how rabbanim should allow internet without a filter. 'sepast nisht' as they say.

sourstix

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 5:37 pm

[quote="Jeanette"]No, I'm not being tongue in cheek in the slightest.

I don't know in what circles other people hang out, but the most that goes on in my Whatsapp is people sharing pictures of their kids. I have yet to see an inappropriate image. Everyone posts under their own name. Everyone behaves.

On the other hand, Imamother posts are anonymous. And because of that people let their guard down. And for some reason that makes people think that it is totally appropriate to post extremely private and intimate things in a public forum to be read by thousands of strangers. That to me is very disturbing and perverse. I understand some people are in desperate situations and need support. It is unfortunate that they can't find that support in person, but maybe some of them are just not making an effort. Some people are just venting and it's easier to do it online than to find one trusted person to discuss personal issues with in private.

Not to mention that I suspect that half the threads are started by trolls trying to rile people up. And how hard is it really to get access to imamother posts? Do you have any idea how many men are reading along for kicks?[/quote]

absolutley men are reading imamother. a close freind to dh used to chat as a woman, a girl a man all types. I dont know which chat rooms he was on. dh wasnt a bit interested, but boy oh boy did he get the kicks out of them. hearing it from him

gp2.0

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 5:55 pm

Why can't they just issue community reminders instead of bans?

Reminder: flirting with the opposite gender is not allowed, including on whatsapp or other social media
Reminder: sharing vulgar jokes, videos and pictures even if not halachically assur are in poor taste and not the way pious Jews behave.
Etc.

Maya

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 5:58 pm

gp2.0 wrote:

Because that would involve reasonable and rational thinking, something they are totally unfamiliar with and have no experience in.

youngishbear

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 6:07 pm

gp2.0 wrote:

Those that do want it disregard all reminders and bans equally, and they're the ones spreading their "pearls of wisdom".

The ban is for those who don't want the vulgarity and flirting, but when it comes their way they may get pulled in. Basically they target the passive silent majority of the people who may not realize how one thing leads to another.

My question is why don't they focus more on building people's spines so they don't end up doing what they themselves know they shouldn't?

And Maya I disagree with your blanket statement about "them". Some, perhaps. But not all.

gp2.0

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 6:13 pm

youngishbear wrote:

But that silent majority would take a reminder seriously as well.

Why ban? Is it - do they love the drama? Is it like I said pages back - they think this is their legacy, their magnum opus that they'll be remembered for in a 100 years?

Plus, reminders make me feel so much guiltier than bans. Gentle admonishment is always more effective than forceful action.

tigerwife

Thu, Jun 18 2015, 6:14 pm

I think this is the thought process behind these kinds of bans:

Person with agenda: Rebbe! There is a new kind of technology called whatsapp that brings terrible untznius pictures and videos into heilige yidishe homes and also causes shalom bayis issues and major bittul Torah!

Rebbe: Oy vey! No one in our community may have such a terrible thing!

Really, how would you react?
I think there is actually a very similar dialogue on video regarding banning the Internet.