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Forum
-> Parenting our children
-> Preschoolers
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amother
Bisque
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 Fri, Jul 10 2015, 3:26 pm
DD5 is intelligent, mature and self aware. She has some, mostly minor, sensory issues; she is uncomfortable with some physical sensations and food textures, and gets extremely overwhelmed in crowds and with too much noise. 95% of the time she is a dream to have around, sociable, creative, helpful. We can go months without a tantrum, but then she has these phases where she throws tantrums, sometimes many times a day, I feel terrible for her… and I am at my wits end! I am staring to catch on that it seems to be transitions that set her off. Pesach vacation, from the school year to the summer, when she got a new sibling, or got rid of paci, etc. There will then often be multiple daily tantrums, for 2-3 weeks, mostly about irrational things.
Please help me to help her adjust more smoothly!
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sneakermom
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Fri, Jul 10 2015, 4:35 pm
Change is hard. For some it throws off their equilibrium.
You recently developed this awareness that transitions throw her off. Share that insight with her. Let her have that self awareness.
You can also do a before and after picture with her. It will help her process the change. (Plain paper, crayons and markers)
And talk about the meltdowns. Explain that they are a sign that someone is feeling overwhelmed. Discuss what calms her down. (A bath, a hug, affirming words, time alone, distraction). Write down her ideas.
Reach out to her specific to her love language. If she loves gifts, buy her a little treat here and there. If she needs touch. Hold her and rub her back. Reinforce the attachment when she needs it the most.
Hatzlacha!
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amother
Bisque
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Sat, Jul 11 2015, 11:02 pm
That was SO helpful. definitely planing to implement your ideas.
How do I know what her love language is? She definitely likes gifts, (who doesn't?) and sometimes likes touch, sometimes hates it. Once, (after reading a book where the following words were said,) she told me that if I said: "What would I do without you," to her, she would feel very good. So now I do, when it is relevant. She loves to profess her love to me, and thank me for basic mommy stuff. (It's so precious!) Does that mean hers is 'words of affirmation'?
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