Rechasim man takes life after child rejected from school

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ra_mom

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 12:09 pm

BDE
http://www.theyeshivaworld.com......html

ra_mom

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 12:14 pm

What did he mean by mafia? Does anyone know?

marina

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 1:33 pm

Ok, if someone kills himself over their child not being accepted into a school, the person probably had many mental health issues to begin with. Very sad and unfortunate, but I wouldn't blame the school for this tragedy.

Jewishmom8

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 1:38 pm

marina wrote:

I agree

amother

cornflower

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 2:15 pm

I read he has been hospitalized many times before in the psych ward, as well as lived on psych pills. Not that it diminishes the tragedy, but we're not talking about your regular person who commits because his daughter wasn't accepted to school. This seems to have been the straw that broke the camels back.

sourstix

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 2:19 pm

I was just reading the comments on yeshiva world. and its sad that people dont realize that its twofold. even people without mental issues go through a very rough time when their child doesnt get accepted. mental illness makes someone do a stupid thing like this. now the child is rejected by the school and is missing a parent. he hurt the child even more. somehow she would end up having a school. but not having a parent is a lot worse. such a young child has to live with this for the rest of her life. what a tragedy. I wish this problem would be solved already. I dont think administrattors should just shrug their shoulders and say oh,its mental illness. but realize the problem needs a solution. bh' here in lakewood the schools do not open until every child is placed. chasdei hashem. it wasnt like this all the time.

Last edited by sourstix on Mon, Aug 31 2015, 2:20 pm; edited 1 time in total

causemommysaid

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 2:19 pm

agree with marina

amother

Taupe

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 2:22 pm

The child was not accepted to first grade! How many valid reasons can you think of for not accepting a first grader to school?

If it was as well known as it seems to be that the father was unwell it is all the more shameful to reject his 6 year old daughter from school.

sourstix

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 2:38 pm

oh now your going into details. good luck accomplishing anything here. if you wanto vent thats ok. I am with you on that.

sourstix

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 2:40 pm

taupe amother, I cant see anyone disagree with you. I think were all agreeing here. its a painful reality. hopefully someone out there will take the courage and do soemthing. may we never know of such tzaar ever.

ahuva06

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 3:00 pm

I hate everything about this story. It's terribly tragic.
And although I agree with what most of the posters are saying, I think it's disrespectful to the man's family to publicize the story. They are undoubtedly in tremendous pain as it is, and don't need the whole world debating exactly how ill he was and what made him do what he did.

shalhevet

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 3:31 pm

Well, someone needed a sensational story I guess.

I read this story in the Hebrew press. The man did not tell anyone why he killed himself, and he didn't leave a note. His brother in law guessed that it was because his daughter wasn't accepted to the school of his choice. She was accepted to a different Chinuch Atzmai school in Rechasim, but not BY.

I have no idea why she wasn't accepted, but I know there are lots of places that simply don't have room for everyone who applies. If you have one class for 40 girls, you have to reject 5 if 45 apply. She had a chareidi school to go to, just not the one of his choice. Since I am not familiar with either, I can't tell you how much of a difference there is between the two.

This is all really speculation, and I think it is highly disrespectful to the niftar to have reported this in a way to gain someone political capital.

naturalmom5

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 3:36 pm

Spare me the apologetics , Shal

black sheep

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 3:42 pm

when someone reaches the point of utter desperation, the feeling that there is no hope in life, even a seemingly "small" thing like a school rejection can be devastating. I think it might also be the feeling that he cannot provide a better life for his daughter than he has for himself. I think publicizing this story is very important, because there needs to be more awareness about the impact schools have on families. this might be an extreme situation, but sometimes extremes highlight issues that need addressing.

my heart breaks for this poor man.

Sanguine

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 3:56 pm

The girl is Sfardi. The school is Ashkenazi. They're Chareidi so I don't know why the father even thought that an Askenazi school would accept a Sfardi girl

shalhevet

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 4:11 pm

Sanguine wrote:

The girl is Sfardi. The school is Ashkenazi. They're Chareidi so I don't know why the father even thought that an Askenazi school would accept a Sfardi girl

I would have expected you would have researched this before posting such a thing. I bet you have visited several BYs in various towns and checked the list of names in each class. I'm sure you wouldn't write such a charged comment without making sure of your facts.

So I think you should spend tomorrow morning visiting a range of BY schools throughout the country and see for yourself that Finklestein and Rubinstein are in the class together with Sharabi and Ben-Naim. Instead of swallowing media stories lock, stock, and barrel. You can come over here and see my daughters' class lists.

Tablepoetry

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 4:19 pm

shalhevet wrote:

So I think you should spend tomorrow morning visiting a range of BY schools throughout the country and see for yourself that Finklestein and Rubinstein are in the class together with Sharabi and Ben-Naim. Instead of swallowing media stories lock, stock, and barrel. You can come over here and see my daughters' class lists.

I don't have any idea what's really going on there, but I read some charedi papers every shabbat that my husband picks up at shul, and the sepharadi charedi papers raised this issue once again in the very recent past. It seems to be a very sore point.

Maybe the media is just making up all these stories about sepharadi charedim not being accepted to the ashkenazi schools; I don't know. But if so, it's not just the secular media, the (sepharadi) charedi media is also portraying this as a problem.

Iymnok

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 4:21 pm

My dd's first grade class list too! Sharabani, Moshiach, Ben-zeev, Machaluf, Toledano... Chareidi Ashkenazi minahelet totally mixed classes.

shalhevet

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 4:29 pm

Tablepoetry wrote:

Not everyone is accepted to every school, for whatever reason - lack of space, ruchani level, etc. The thing is when it's someone Ashkenazi, no one can say it's for "racist" reasons, but when it's someone Sephardi, there is political (both secular and chareidi politics) capital and personal reasons, to say it's just because they are Sephardi. If you say a lie enough, people will believe it.

The only exception is with yeshivas, because there there really is an interest to have an Ashkenazi majority so that they don't have problems with minyan, nusach etc. There are still plenty of Sephardi boys, but there probably is a "quota" system. If lots of Ashkenazi boys wanted to go to Sephardi yeshivot, they would do the exact same thing in reverse. But this is simply not true with girls' schools. Go and look at the class lists.

chaiz

Mon, Aug 31 2015, 4:45 pm

shalhevet wrote:

But if you look at who is not accepted, is it majority sefardi or majority ashkenazi?
Regardless, for a chareidi mosad to not be able to accept a child from the community there has to be a very good reason. We are talking about neshamos. To say we have no space is a cop out. I know all the excuses; I have had this discussion too often with family members. To me it is hypocrisy for the chareidi community to tell community members that our moisdos do not have space for your children.

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