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Shabbos ema run amok
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amother
Bisque


 

Post Wed, Sep 16 2015, 8:56 pm
Your daughter comes home today thrilled to have been chosen as shabbos ema. She has a note from morah requesting you send a bag of corn pops and a quart of cut watermelon. For tomorrow morning. How would you handle?
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strawberry cola




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Sep 16 2015, 9:01 pm
Ask her if dd can take a rain check for next week. Or if Morah can buy the nosh and you will pay. or if you can substitute x and y which are in your pantry /fridge
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esther09




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Sep 16 2015, 9:13 pm
Honestly, I would go out of my way to make sure DD has something (hopefully the thing requested but if not, some kind of substitute) to bring in. If you don't send, all it does is make your DD feel bad. But I would definitely have a word with the morah. Very unfair and inconsiderate.
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amother
Red


 

Post Wed, Sep 16 2015, 9:37 pm
This is an issue near and dear to my heart. I couldn't drive until fairly recently, and every time I would get some notice about having to bring in X the day before it had to be brought in, it was such a stress. I had to keep to a very specific schedule with my errands and whatever I didn't get done then it had to wait several days or else I'd have to put it on dh (which I really tried to avoid, he has enough on his plate), or beg favors from others, which is no fun. I am not in that situation anymore, but it still makes me so angry. Teachers, please have some consideration that parents can't necessarily rearrange their schedules to accommodate classroom activities! These things need more than a day's notice! Shabbos Imma/Abba is something you know ahead of time, so please give reasonable notice!
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amother
Plum


 

Post Wed, Sep 16 2015, 11:11 pm
Dear Morah,
I work evenings after my husband returns home. He can't leave to the store as someone needs to be home while the kids are asleep. By the time my work is done, I am exhausted and most stores are closed- definitely all the frum ones to get the heimish brand corn chips you requested!
I know you don't want substitutions as everyone will end up bringing in the same items but what am I to do when you ask on Thursday for Friday???

(Plus pet peeve as one school I worked in one summer did not serve all the snacks shabbos imma and abba brought in. They "saved it" for another time but I didn't really see it being handed out. Just missing from the cabinet....)
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momX4




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Sep 16 2015, 11:17 pm
amother wrote:
Your daughter comes home today thrilled to have been chosen as shabbos ema. She has a note from morah requesting you send a bag of corn pops and a quart of cut watermelon. For tomorrow morning. How would you handle?


Isnt shabbos party on Friday? I can understand that this week the morah couldnt give you any earlier notice due to Rosh Hashana, but my dd came home with a note on Tuesday that she is being shabbos Ima. We had plenty of time and we had a choice of any candy and cookies from the appropriate hechsher list.
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seeker




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Sep 16 2015, 11:51 pm
Happy that my kid's school mostly asks for money. But I guess then you'll have someone complaining here about how they always ask for money. Still, it's easier to come up with than a quart of cut watermelon Wink
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gp2.0




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Sep 16 2015, 11:56 pm
I'd be happy that they ask for fruit! They eat so much junk at the party every week and it's totally unnecessary. But sure, ask the teacher for more notice next time.
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Amarante




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 7:31 am
Really there isn't anything to do except grit your teeth and provide what was asked for. It is for your daughter's sake. But I would definitely send a polite note explaining that your circumstances make it extremely difficult to supply food on short notice - especially such specific items.

My mother was a teacher and I still remember that in second grade there was a cooking demonstration of some kind in the classroom which left a very burned pan. The teacher asked for volunteers to bring tje pan home to clean and OF COURSE all tje good girls frantically waved their hands for the honor of bringing home for their mothers to scour. I won the "dubious prize" and got to take it home. My mother was so mad at the teacher for imposing this in her because she would never have done this in her class. The last thing she needed was more dishes to wash after a long day at work and then coming home to cook and straighten etc.
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SRS




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 7:41 am
Our school puts out a list at the beginning of the school year noting the Shabbos host and the required items to bring (which does not include fruit, just challah and grape juice. . .fresh items are provided by the school). I note my day on my calendar and toss the list. All schools should do this. Parents really should insist on consideration. But, yeah, I'd go out of my way because what else am I going to do? But, please have a word with a teacher and share the above with her so she can have better systems. Think of your talk with her as professional development because so many schools are not giving appropriate guidance.
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smss




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 9:41 am
Amarante wrote:


My mother was a teacher and I still remember that in second grade there was a cooking demonstration of some kind in the classroom which left a very burned pan. The teacher asked for volunteers to bring tje pan home to clean and OF COURSE all tje good girls frantically waved their hands for the honor of bringing home for their mothers to scour. I won the "dubious prize" and got to take it home. My mother was so mad at the teacher for imposing this in her because she would never have done this in her class. The last thing she needed was more dishes to wash after a long day at work and then coming home to cook and straighten etc.


shock Can't believe a teacher would do this.
Was this in a frum school? Wouldn't there anyway be kashrus concerns?
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Sanguine




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 10:06 am
OP - you just got stuck cause of Rosh HaShana and cause it's the start of the year so don't go nuts on the teacher. Do you have something you can send instead? Or maybe a neighbor does? (What are corn pops?). Send pretzels, or pop popcorn, slice up apples... Just send something. Be flattered that the teacher thinks you're so put together that she can send home a note to you when she's in a bind the day before Very Happy

Amarante wrote:
My mother was a teacher and I still remember that in second grade there was a cooking demonstration of some kind in the classroom which left a very burned pan. The teacher asked for volunteers to bring tje pan home to clean and OF COURSE all tje good girls frantically waved their hands for the honor of bringing home for their mothers to scour. I won the "dubious prize" and got to take it home. My mother was so mad at the teacher for imposing this in her because she would never have done this in her class. The last thing she needed was more dishes to wash after a long day at work and then coming home to cook and straighten etc.


Here, the gans send the white Kabbalat Shabbat table cloths home with a child to be washed for next Shabbat party Rolling Eyes . But my worst kid volunteer job was - The boys in the school (1-8 grade) would play ball in the school yard during recess and often a hot kid would pull off his Tzitzit while playing and hang them on the schoolyard fence. Then they'd run into class and forget their tzitzit there. After awhile there was a tremendous collection of tzitzit on the fence so my son's Rav had a "great idea" - We'll collect all those tzitzit and distribute them to poor children who can't afford tzitzit (What a Tzadik...) - So guess whose son volunteered to bring the whole bunch home for washing and detangling!
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Chayalle




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 11:22 am
I don't think you have to send exactly what the teacher requested. She doesn't get to dictate your shopping habits or list. But you should try to send a reasonable substitute.
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mha3484




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 11:24 am
My sons playgroup last year asked for money and she provided all of the nosh for shabbos party. This year they just ask for any mezonos with a variety of approved hechsures. They asked wednesday which is when I do my shopping on a good week.
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amother
Bisque


 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 2:17 pm
Don't know why it had to be sent today when shabbos party is tomorrow. I sent a bag of tortilla chips and a bag of baby carrots with a note that this is the best I could do on one night's notice. Don't worry, I wasn't stressing over this. I was more amused/incredulous at the request and curious if others think it is reasonable. Looks like you all agree. So what was the teacher thinking??
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notshanarishona




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 2:45 pm
Asking for specific things is wrong, especially if you are asking on a day's notice.
The more polite thing would be: Please bring in a nosh for the class Shabbas party tomorrow.
I would definitely speak to the teacher and complain.
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Sanguine




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 3:22 pm
amother wrote:
Don't know why it had to be sent today when shabbos party is tomorrow. I sent a bag of tortilla chips and a bag of baby carrots with a note that this is the best I could do on one night's notice. Don't worry, I wasn't stressing over this. I was more amused/incredulous at the request and curious if others think it is reasonable. Looks like you all agree. So what was the teacher thinking??
bag of baby carrots?? LOL How creative!! The kids will love them and it will become the new standard for Shabbos Party Thumbs Up
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amother
Azure


 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 3:42 pm
Coming from the perspective of a teacher: In my experience parents have lots to keep track of and if I would send home the note on Wednesday, it was very likely the child wouldn't come with anything. I never specified which foods to bring - just a healthy snack. Only one parent ever complained that it was too short notice, and she was the one with just 2 children.
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BetsyTacy




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 3:53 pm
Oh, azure amother, no mother, even one with "only" two children, would appreciate knowing that she has to run her shopping schedule around a teacher who feels that with "only" two children she can run to the store at a moment's notice. My kid's morah is not my owner, nor my boss.
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amother
Blue


 

Post Thu, Sep 17 2015, 4:43 pm
BetsyTacy wrote:
Oh, azure amother, no mother, even one with "only" two children, would appreciate knowing that she has to run her shopping schedule around a teacher who feels that with "only" two children she can run to the store at a moment's notice. My kid's morah is not my owner, nor my boss.

Thank you!!! Goodness. My "only" two children keep me busy day and night. I would NOT appreciate such short notice.
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