DH lost his job, what to do?

amother

Pewter

Mon, Sep 21 2015, 8:06 pm

We've been married almost a year and are expecting our first child Baruch Hashem Smile

dh had a good job with a great salary for 2 months, and then was let go, totally out of the blue Sad

they blamed him for something that happened a month before he even started working there Sad

and they gave him the excuse that they thought he'd be a good fit for the company, but they realized they didn't need someone with his degree, it's not what they were looking for. It's not that I'm so flustered or aggravated, and neither is he. He is now taking his free time to study for the licencing exam for his field. But I hate seeing him shooting around the house helplessly, doing not much (during the day he studies and looks for jobs online, but when I come home at the end of the day, he is tired, as am I, and he seems so sad lately, which I understand.) He is worried about Parnassa, we don't have much to begin with, but with only my salary, we won't get very far. We don't wanna start off our marriage going into debt! It happens to be, he's more worried about the actual Parnassa than I am. I'm worried about him. He insists he is fine, he is just frustrated that he lost his job and can't find one. He is being proactive about setting up meetings and interviews, but feels it's going nowhere. I feel so bad for him. I keep trying to project my naturally positive personality into our lives, and I keep telling him how much I love him,,I but I feel like that's going nowhere Sad

I don't think he's depressed, just frustrated and worried, but I'm so davening that he finds a good job soon! I don't wanna say exactly what field he's in, as ppl know irl, but it's in the technological/financial department of medical facilities (mostly hospitals). If anyone knows anyone who may be able to help, please let me know. We are willing to move if we really have to, and if it'll be worth it. I could use some tips as well for how to continue trying to keep our home positive, even in a somewhat stressful time. Thanks Smile

Queen6

Mon, Sep 21 2015, 8:48 pm

You're amazing. Keep up the good work. Your positive attitude will help everything. That's great that he's proactive about jobs and that he's studying as well. Iy"h this will end soon.
Just keep on top that he has a regular committed schedule that interacts with other people. 3 Minyanim a day and a shiur are so important for his emotional well being. He will feel good to be with people plus its great networking. The more people he speaks to the better off he is.
Continue to keep busy and to keep people in his life.
Hashem will walk you through it.

amother

Pewter

Mon, Sep 21 2015, 8:57 pm

Thanks queen Smile

he learns every day before shacharis (alone, but around people) and after mincha (with a chavrusa). On shabbos he learns also before shacharis, and for about 2 hrs before mincha. So he's around ppl often. He doesn't want to live here forever, because of the competitiveness among the members of the Jewish community here. He didn't grow up with it. And I totally am fine with that. I understand him. So yeah for now we are just trying our best!

amother

Navy

Mon, Sep 21 2015, 9:31 pm

That must be so hard. My dh was also out of a job for a while when we were first married and it was so stressful! I don't really have any practical advice other than what you're already doing. These things can take time though so try not to get frustrated. We've been on a bit of a financial roller coaster the past few years, and all I can say is that looking back, it is all so clearly from Hashem, even though at the time it didn't seem that way. Bh things have worked out, but in a way that was very different from what we expected!! Keep looking, and keep davening, and hopefully it'll all work out for you too Smile

rachel6543

Mon, Sep 21 2015, 10:13 pm

Where are you located? I would make sure to apply for unemployment if you have that where you live.

In the meantime, your husband will need to keep applying for jobs, interviews, networking... Etc. It literally can be full time work to find a job!! And unfortunately many companies don't apply to applications and resumes until weeks or months later!

Does your husband have his resume online and a LinkedIn profile? I think it's very helpful to have that. Last year I was in your husbands situation, looking for a new job. Posting my resume online and having a LinkedIn profile helped a lot. I actually got a job offer from a company that found my resume online. They interviewed me the next day and I had a written job offer by lunchtime!!

My husband works in a similar field, financial/analyst support for hospitals. You can private message me if you want me to send you the company name and location where my husband works, in case your husband wants to apply. I'm located on the west coast. Don't want to give me exact location under my screen name. There are a few other frum Jews who work at the same company my husband does.