A horrifying case of child abuse..."natural" parenting

LittleDucky

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 1:56 pm

amother wrote:

Sourstix, extremes are never healthy. I try to be natural minded when I can when it comes to food (not when it comes to illness!) but at the same time realize that depriving my kids won't do any good. And the social ramifications of not being able to have what other kids have are more damaging than having some junk once in awhile. I spend a lot of time (my own time, my own choice, no impositions) trying to find healthy foods that taste good and even my husband admits that my cooking is pretty good Wink

I don't like buying snack bags that are overloaded with junk, but the once in awhile that my kids are with me I let them choose junk. They get shabbos party on shabbos.. etc.. And more than enough treats during the week, including candy, but I try to buy those without artificial flavoring. I find that by making sure that the meals I serve don't have junk in them, I'm not as concerned when their treats aren't that healthy.

My long winded point is - everything in moderation.

Moderation with ANYTHING is key. I know someone who was not allowed a type of really sugary candy. Well, it happened to be her favorite and popular at school so whenever it was offered at school, friends' houses, parties etc she overate it. That isn't healthy either. It might have been better to be allowed it in moderation. (Only for shabbos party/birthday party etc vs totally banned. )

Same with antibiotics- over prescribing them have helped make superbugs. (Not every cough is bacterial!) But without them we wouldn't have as high a life expectancy as we do! When kids can't breathe... Time to see a real doctor. Or just go to an ER.

Raisin

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 2:01 pm

chavs wrote:

I can't see the article, was her name present as I'd like to Google out put can sometime post the article please. Thank you!

I did on page three of this thread. also someone else linked to a screenshot.

ariellabella

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 2:05 pm

chavs wrote:

I can't see the article, was her name present as I'd like to Google out put can sometime post the article please. Thank you!

http://imgur.com/sb8o5cC

amother

Sapphire

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 2:32 pm

chavs wrote:

I can't see the article, was her name present as I'd like to Google out put can sometime post the article please. Thank you!

Her name is heather Dexter. Another user posted the whole article further up.

amother

Sapphire

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 2:54 pm

*just another reminder that naturopaths aren't doctors. They are quacks. This former naturopath blows the whole thing apart:

http://www.naturopathicdiaries.com

sneakermom

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 3:04 pm

Just want to add that the enemas a few times a day was a whole nother dimension to the abuse.

I have heard of adult survivors who talk about frequent enemas by an abusive parent. It's a kosher way to violate a child's private parts.

Miri7

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 3:13 pm

I have no patience for this all or nothing "natural" parenting. Before antibiotics and vaccines, untold numbers of children did not survive childhood. That's what is "natural". I am so grateful that is no longer the reality at least where I live.

I consider myself to be pretty naturally minded in that we cook healthy homemade meals, don't have soda in the house, do lots of physical activity and strictly limit any screen time.

But my kids get some candy and are fully vaccinated. We avail ourselves of modern medicine. I use some natural remedy tricks to help alleviate symptoms - like honey for a mild cough, but call our doctor when something concerns me.

I am truly grateful to Hashem for all of the tools I have to keep my kids healthy and alleviate their suffering.

chavs

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 3:28 pm

Thank you, I'll have a look!

amother

Bisque

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 3:29 pm

I will totally not be surprised if these kids grow up smoking marijuana, after all it's natural....

To suffer this kind of torture would naturally turn out rebellious soda drinking hot dog eating teens.

I wonder why this mom is not arrested.

bluebird

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 3:41 pm

She displayed NO empathy or Compassiom for her suffering children in her writing. She seemed to enjoy it, actually, because she could show off about what a crunchy mom she is. I find that extremely disturbing on top of the abuse she put them through.

Zehava

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 3:42 pm

A distinction needs to be made between natural and healthy. Not the same thing.

Hashem_Yaazor

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 3:46 pm

sourstix wrote:

yes I know a woman thats natural minded. and her kids dont wnat to eat any of her food. she cuts out anything that has some taste in it. so no sugar. but she uses xylitol. but her kids dont like her food. and then she is left fighting with them about every bag of supersnacks. goodness! I feel so bad for those kids. they are so skinny scrawny, most are underweight and not height apropriate. she still wont see that shes nuts! she has been like this since a teen. and married with her extreme ideas. her husband brings home normal nosh and refuses that she shouldnt give it to them. he makes sure to give them. now I call that lacking shalom bayis. but hes not giving in to all of this. so she does her thing and he does his thing. and she wont give her kids dairy bec she claims they all cough bec of it. ok. so when they arent coughing he buys cheese and just gives it to them. I commend him dealing with it this way. cause no amount of talking changes her mind. shes stuborn nature. but a nice person in other ways. she just got caught in nonsensical stuff. I feel bad for her kids. her kids are so undernourished because of her extreme ideas. why cant all natural minded mothers leave all of that on themselves? give your child a choice when they are grown? I know children that wnet throught this and resent their parents for it. dont make exteme decisions for your kids. let them grow up and decide for themselves.

I have a kid who is extremely underweight. Skin and bones. Ironically, this is the child with a perpetual candy stash from who knows where. I have a kid who is 50th percentile for weight based on height who eats some junk from school but mainly eats healthy food. Stop judging parents for different choices that are not negligent (not cooking with sugar, avoiding cheese) and blaming everything you see and perceive as wrong as results of those choices. This has nothing to do with the original article where there was danger involved in not getting appropriate medical care when warranted. Sure, parents who never allow treats may find their parenting choices backfiring with the kids stuffing themselves all over elsewhere, but that's a parenting choice, just like crying it out or co-sleeping or using time outs or using time-ins or whatever of the myriad choices we make as parents. I think it's so wrong and hurtful to judge everyone who does things differently than you with the absolute certainty that something you see as a problem is definitely based on that parenting choice. Even if you were right and there is a problem and the problem is directly linked to parenting choices, does it help by being mekatreg online without a way of helping them? Do you not think they have pediatrician visits that will help address any real health concern?

gp2.0

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 3:50 pm

Her father told her she was letting her pride get in the way of doing the right thing and she blew up at him. Crazy. This woman is certifiable. She fits the profile of women who strap their kids into car seats and drive off a bridge. This has nothing to do with naturopathic medicine - this woman needs serious help.

amother

Babypink

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 4:44 pm

gp2.0 wrote:

Heather has a blog. Blogs make money. Who says it is even true. I follow a certain well- known health blogger. I find inconsistancies all the time once you read her comments. For example, she boasts about how they use her homemade toothpaste but later she will link to a bought company her kids like and the flavora they like (well if they your homemade stuff, why are you buying). She makes money off the affiliate links in her ingredients in the recipe and in recommending the product. She always has to mention "we rarely get sick (baloney) but when we do I make this tincture and that chest rub etc." She has dozens of recipes and concoctions. Why make them if you never get sick? Either you get sick, or you are just making money off your ads/ links.

Blogs are to get readers, entertain, and make money. Heather was waaaay to sensational in her writing. Stupid. She missed the boat, but who says it is even true?

Dandelion1

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 5:45 pm

The most telling thing in that whole awful rant is the fact that she casually moans about her kids "barfing and puking" in the most insensitive of terms, as if it were an annoyance to be tolerated.

The true suffering was done by her.... Can you imagine how hard it is to sleep through 3 months of that??

The entire peice was about her. I don't think there was one example of motherly compassion toward the sick suffering kids.

I'm assuming that she would face a disease like Ebola in the same fashion? If not, then where is the conviction?

Volunteer

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 7:15 pm

It's sadly ironic that the author vehemently rejected vasodilators and antibiotics because she thinks they cause lung damage, yet was proud to,subject her children to 4 months of whooping cough, which definitely causes lung damage.

Also, she rejected vaccines because she thinks they cause cognitive disorders (such as autism), yet is unconcerned about the effects of oxygen deprivation on her babies (especially the 9 month old) .

And since the article seems to focus on how pertussis affected her, who knows what else her children endured that we don't know about? Broken ribs? Side effects of all her home remedies? I don't want to know what having an enema every 4 hours round the clock,is like, but it could only have made it worse.

Hashem yishmor

ariellabella

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 7:36 pm

Seems they took down the whole site for a while at some point in the past week due to the uproar: http://a.disquscdn.com/uploads.....l.jpg

But then it went back up, including that insane post.

little_mage

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 8:04 pm

Here's a nice rebuttal to the article: https://www.sciencebasedmedici.....ough/

Bsimcha

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 8:18 pm

amother wrote:

How did people get through the Black Plague? Is that a joke?

They didn't. They died.

Exactly what I yelled out as I read that!

PinkFridge

Thu, Nov 05 2015, 8:23 pm

ariellabella wrote:

Seems they took down the whole site for a while at some point in the past week due to the uproar: http://a.disquscdn.com/uploads.....l.jpg

But then it went back up, including that insane post.

Wow. I read that and I have to go curl up in a corner in the fetal position because those ladies so violated my personal space. My deepest inner feelings. My conviction that one sounds much more intelligent when one uses apostrophes, and appropriately. This link, which I cannot even contemplate anymore without puking and barfing disempowered me and totally destructed (sic) (sick) my most innate equilibrium. You, my friends, on this hallowed space of the world wide web we weave are my true Inspirators.
And don't you ever forget it.