HELP! 10 mos and never sleeps!

Bellamom

Wed, Nov 11 2015, 3:16 pm

My 10 month old wakes up tons in the middle of the night. I nurse him to sleep and then he wakes up in 1/2 hour and then in another 1/2 hour and then every 2-3 hours until the morning.sometimes he wakes up every hour. I first try rubbing his back and shushing but if that doesn't work, I pick him up. I can't let him cry it out because my toddler sleeps in the next room. I'm seriously going crazy and making myself sick. Oh, and when he wakes up he screams like crazy.
He also does this during the day. He falls asleep, I try putting him in crib and then he screams and cries until I pick him up.
Please help 😥😥😥

Tekky

Wed, Nov 11 2015, 4:23 pm

OMG! I came on the site tonight to post the EXACT SAME dilemma! I literally wake up feeling like I never slept. my baby is almost 10 months and I made the huge mistake of keeping her in my bed. she now only nurses back to sleep (toddler is sleeping next door and will wake up if I let my baby cry for more than thirty second). I need help! a sleep-trainer or someone who just wants to take my baby for a night!

Tekky

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 10:49 am

honestly - it's pretty bad. I can't get out of it. she's such a great baby during the day and then *bam* - night falls, and she simply can't sleep iwthout her mouth practically on me the entire night. whenever a/o I know hears of my dilemma, they just go on and on how mothers are so dumb these days and don't know how to take care of babies, let them cry, don't ever nurse them back to sleep, etc. etc.

I don't want to hear that! I need advice moving forward....

pesek zman

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 11:04 am

You should not be nursing to sleep. She needs to know (learn) how to fall asleep on her own. Do you nurse her to fall asleep for naps too? You should be putting her to sleep in her crib when she is sleepy but awake. At her age she doesn't need to eat overnight, she is nursing for comfort and out of habit and because she can. You both need your sleep. There are many excellent sleep books I can recommend if you like that can go into detail about baby sleep habits

Stars

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 11:07 am

I stopped nursing every time he wakes up. We had a week of screaming, then his sleep got slightly better. But since then, if he wakes up that's it for the night. I must take him into my bed otherwise there is screaming till the morning. And sometimes even in my bed he screams. Or just stays awake for 2-3 hours. I can't do this anymore.

luppamom

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 11:40 am

I found that once my baby started drinking from sippy cups independently, the waking up in the middle of the night pretty much stopped. (It also happened to be the same time when she weaned.) 11-12 months.

You nurse him to sleep or before he goes to sleep? B/c to sleep is a big problem and I would work on trying to stop that. He needs to learn to put himself to sleep. You need to make sure he is able to fall asleep independently and recreate the environment when he wakes up in the middle of the night. (Meaning, he wakes up and where are you and your breast?)

pesek zman

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 11:43 am

Stars wrote:

My baby has cried for 2-3 hours and then finally has fallen asleep. Ear plugs help (me) to dull the cries somewhat It's hard, of course it is. But if I know that she's not sick or teething or anything out of the ordinary, she does not get rewarded for her cries. she has learned that nighttime is for sleeping and in her own bed. Short term pain long term gain

Stars

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 11:44 am

luppamom wrote:

OP sorry for hijacking but feel free to answer this independently. My baby sleeps in his own room. I nurse him before bed but he doesn't usually fall asleep on me. Just this week I have been getting the feeling that he is ready to be weaned, do you think giving a sippy before bed instead of nursing will make a difference?

Stars

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 11:46 am

pesek zman wrote:

Whined, cried or screamed? My baby screams his head off. Literally. There is no way my heart could let him do that.

luppamom

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 11:55 am

Stars wrote:

I can't say for sure, obviously, but I think it's worth a try. Give him a sippy when you put him to bed. Save nursing for earlier in the day if you both still want. If he's a very big drinker, don't fill it too high b/c you don't want him to wake up from a too wet diaper. Make sure the sippy is available for him when he wakes up in the middle of the night. (Refill it and put it back quietly or prepare 2 not filled high). First, you might have to come in and teach him to take it, but then he should get it on his own. Once my DD "got" the sippy cup, I would sometimes hear her wake-up and then hear gulping and then she went back to sleep. Basically, she was thirsty, but could take care of the need herself.

DD (16 mos.) will occasionally wakeup and cry. I don't go to her immediately unless it sounds like she is really in pain. Within a few minutes, she usually settles herself down. If I come in, I usually make things worse.

luppamom

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 12:06 pm

pesek zman wrote:

What I did was let her cry (she's not such a big crier, would cry mostly off and on and kvetch), but came in occasionally to check on her and settle her down and help her find her paci if she threw it on the ground (She s/t does that when she's awake for awhile.). and snuggled her up in her blankie. I would change her diaper inside her crib too, if I felt it was necessary. Sometimes this changed the pace just enough (but not in such an exciting way b/c it was dark and in a crib) or it made her feel better and she fell asleep.

No rewards for crying, just reassuring.

luppamom

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 12:29 pm

Forgot one more important point.

Make sure the room is light enough for the baby to re-situate themselves. If they wake-up, but can't find that sippy cup or comfy item b/c they can't see, then they're going to cry. I find that leaving the door open a drop and some light in the hallway works.

Bellamom

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 3:13 pm

Op here
I nurse him to sleep or rock him to sleep. He doesn't drink from zippy cup by himself so that won't work and doesn't cuddle anything. I can't do cry it out cuz my hubby and I decided to never do that.

luppamom

Thu, Nov 12 2015, 3:22 pm

Bellamom wrote:

Can you try to teach him? I found the nuby one to be easy.

Research No Cry sleep training methods. Baby Whisperer is one, although, I didn't like her book (just read one) that much.