Obligation to guest

DrMom

Tue, Nov 17 2015, 5:06 am

amother wrote:

Sorry. DH met him at shul on a different continent. My shul doesn't have any sort of chesed committee, nor does it have a ladies section, and I can't think of any single frum girls ready for shiducim. It is a new community.

I can give him housing; however, I can't give him kitchen facilities while we are gone. Pesach is problematic.

I don't think you need to force single women on this poor guy. He might not want that, and it could prove awkward. If you don't mind him sleeping in your home while you are away, just worry about finding him meals. You have a few months -- how hard could it be?

Send him tourist attraction information, bus/taxi/train info. Help him plan some outings so he won't be bored. He's an adult -- presumably he does not need a babysitter.

If you think he might prefer company, then start finding someone else to house him on chol hamoed. Send an email to your shul's hospitality committee, or to the shul president to have him forward to all the members.

amother

Scarlet

Tue, Nov 17 2015, 6:59 am

DrMom wrote:

I can't give him kitchen facilities. I can lock a door between the house and a couple of bedrooms and a bathroom. I don't want to get him a refrigerator because inevitably something get damaged when things are moved. I think it is too much to buy stuff for just his visit although what is this guy going to do for breakfast?

Our Shul seems different than what you are used to. There isn't a hospitality committee. I would have to ask a personal favor to get meals for the guest.

WhatFor

Tue, Nov 17 2015, 7:36 am

I think you need clarification on what "coming for Pesach" means. If he's coming just to visit you/dh, then you can say Pesach is not the greatest time, why don't you come for this-and-this weekend?
If he plans on traveling anyway (and that might well be his plan) why don't you just say, "we're happy to host you for the sedarim, but we'll be away for most of the rest of Pesach." I think it's quite presumptuous to assume someone you barely know would host you for such an extensive time, and it could be he'd be happy with whatever you give him. If he's the kind of guy who would be outraged that you're not hosting him more...well, that's the kind of guy you probably wouldn't want to host at all.

causemommysaid

Tue, Nov 17 2015, 8:01 am

it sounds like you don't really want to host him which is fine. I wouldn't want to host a stranger either for the whole pesach.

Tell him he is invited for the first days and needs to make alternate arrangements for the rest. It is not your responsibility. If you don't mind him staying in your house while you are away tell him where the local grocery store is and he can figure out his own matzah and cream cheese for chol hamoed.

amother

Scarlet

Tue, Nov 17 2015, 8:13 am

causemommysaid wrote:

The truth is I don't when I look at the logistics. He is single and probably clueless what hosting entails. He is probably used to a giant pesach and what is one more person. I don't mind one more for the seders and last days because we will be having other guests.

Also, any other time of the year I could give him small appliances and there are places he could eat. I don't even know if he could get a cup of coffee around here. DH will not allow our regular hot water urn to be used Pesach so I can't give him that even.

OTOH I feel bad for him.