Home
Log in / Sign Up
    Private Messages   Advanced Search   Rules   New User Guide   FAQ   Advertise   Contact Us  
Forum -> Hobbies, Crafts, and Collections -> Reading Room
Loved Mishpacha Fiction on High School Jobs
Previous  1  2  3  Next



Post new topic   Reply to topic View latest: 24h 48h 72h

Simple1




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 10:22 am
amother wrote:
Its funny how different people are.

I went through high school trying to stay under the radar. I cringed every time I got chosen. I tried to spend as little time being involved in committees, projects, conventions, etc.

I am shocked that so many people actually want to be chosen for this stuff.

I am very outgoing and friendly but I hated these kind of things.


There are jobs for behind-the-scenes too, which could have worked for someone like you.

Forgot to mention that in my dds school, in 11th grade they give a list of jobs to the girls and ask them to check a few they'd like. This is taken into consideration when choosing the jobs.
Back to top

amother
Mustard


 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 10:36 am
Simple1 wrote:
There are jobs for behind-the-scenes too, which could have worked for someone like you.

Forgot to mention that in my dds school, in 11th grade they give a list of jobs to the girls and ask them to check a few they'd like. This is taken into consideration when choosing the jobs.


Growing up I never felt that high school was my life.

My friends and I went to school and then our "real life" started outside of school.

We just were not into these things. We would rather go to the mall or plan a sleepover than be part of GO or even props committee.
Back to top

Simple1




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 10:42 am
amother wrote:
Growing up I never felt that high school was my life.

My friends and I went to school and then our "real life" started outside of school.

We just were not into these things. We would rather go to the mall or plan a sleepover than be part of GO or even props committee.


Then that method would have worked for you too. The job list was long - there must have been something very low key on there.
Back to top

amother
Indigo


 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 10:46 am
I agree that in most schools the "good" jobs are given to the same few girls year after to year but once in a while they get it right! I was a very shy introverted girl in elementary school and came to high school with no friends ( my only friends from elementary school went to a different high school.) I had a really hard time making friends but then I was put in the play and made friends there, the next year I was given a small job and in 12th grade I was given one of the "top" jobs ( think g.o. chessed EIC etc.). needless to say I cam out of high school a totally different girl then I went in. my self-esteem sky-rocked, I had no problem making friends and am now BH married with kids. Smile
Back to top

amother
Lavender


 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 10:52 am
Again, I cannot and will not defend every high school.

In the school I work for, I see a lot of thought going into the jobs.

Yes, there are times that girls get repeatedly used, but ironically sometimes that is because if not for them, the other girls who are in that same group or committee think that their job is too "nebby" for them to do.

I also see some experimenting done in earlier grades in high school with girls proving themselves to be irresponsible and not able to handle responsibilities that are given to them.

Again, I am the first to admit that there are girls who are overlooked, and try to speak up when I see it (although I am not directly involved in job distribution) and I guess some schools really might be as bad as the story depicts, but I also see hours of work and thought going into the process.
Back to top

amother
Lavender


 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 10:54 am
amother wrote:
I agree that in most schools the "good" jobs are given to the same few girls year after to year but once in a while they get it right! I was a very shy introverted girl in elementary school and came to high school with no friends ( my only friends from elementary school went to a different high school.) I had a really hard time making friends but then I was put in the play and made friends there, the next year I was given a small job and in 12th grade I was given one of the "top" jobs ( think g.o. chessed EIC etc.). needless to say I cam out of high school a totally different girl then I went in. my self-esteem sky-rocked, I had no problem making friends and am now BH married with kids. Smile


Yes, in the school that I work for I see a lot of that happening. And yet, unfortunately, there are still always girls that are probably overlooked.
Back to top

amother
Aqua


 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 11:22 am
Didn't read the article but I'd like to add my two cents , for what it's worth.

As a student in a fairly large high school, I was "recycled" many times. I was head of various shabbosim, yb editor, part of important committees etc. I was s bright, hard working student but no family yichus, money or connections. There was one person involved in the decision making that knew, unlike anyone else, that I had a difficult home situation ( abusive family Etc) and aside for my bring "qualified " for the job, it was important for me to be kept busy out of the house as much as possible.
I will tell you that this was my saving grace. I would've long ago had a nervous breakdown and become a broken person . Being involved in productive activities that used my talents and strengths built me up and allowed me to become a confident independent person instead of a quivering shell.

Today I am a hs teacher, teaching for quite a few years. Although I am not involved in giving out jobs, I do hear a lot of the backstory to many decisions. While it is not always done fairly or correctly and the system leaves much to be desired, many times there are factors that go into this process that is not clear to the casual observer... Today we have girls that. Need to be kept out of their homes, off the street, away from negative influences or people...
Trust me, in a heartbeat, I would've given up every one of those coveted jobs for a loving home to come home to each night.
Back to top

amother
Wine


 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 8:19 pm
I was in a small school where every girl got two jobs, a year job (aka GO job) and yearbook job. It was really sad to see how some girls got top jobs for both things and other girls got nothing major for both things.

The biggest problem IMO is that the staff don't even know which jobs are considered prestigious!!! Aside from GO and yearbook editor, they don't know what's considered a good job. In our years, Sewing for the play was a real nebby, nerdy job while Publicity was the great catch (you got to visit other schools to sell tickets!). One of the Chessed heads was given Publicity and many girls felt it was unfair. I was given Sewing and was extremely disappointed (as I had no idea how to sew and felt like I earned myself a better job), and the principal said, oh, but how should we know that sewing is not a good job? And I was left feeling like it's my fault that I got a nebby job...
Back to top

Amelia Bedelia




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 9:00 pm
What I thought was really sad was that if the girl specifically requested the position, wanted the position, and thought she was qualified for the position, why on earth would they not let her prove herself?
Back to top

amother
Plum


 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 9:20 pm
I used to teach in an elementary school where the opposite extreme drove me nuts. The socialist approach left everyone with nothing and no one with anything. The graduating class was divided in 4 groups. Each group had a different category of jobs. There was yiddish yearbook, english yearbook, something to do with the graduation performance, and the last group were the g.o. and activity heads of other projects throughout the year.

No one was more than anyone else. The positions were equal. Yet there were still discrepencies because each year/grade/class there were different jobs that were coveted. A specific class that hated learning clamored to be on the graduation production because it meant leaving class for an hour twice a week for several months. Yippeee. In a different class being head of this or that was considered prestigious. Similarly, being on yiddish or English yearbook staff fluctuated in percieved honor depending on how much a specific class liked yiddish or english classes or teachers.

I looked at it as a travesty. There was no more chief editor, no more valedictorian in a real sense, no acknowledging girls for their writing talent, academic achievements, artistic talent, or anything else that girls need recognition for to build their identity. One common excuse I heard was that their talent was enough recognition they don't need more attention on top of that. Another loss was the artifical equalization which (never worked 100% anyway and) serves to cripple kids. They leave school expecting to face "fairness" forever.

Ha. Life isn't fair, and yes, schools need to use seichel when giving out jobs so that everyone gets to develop their talent, but it's okay to recognize talent when it does exist.
Back to top

yogabird




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 9:53 pm
amother wrote:
I used to teach in an elementary school where the opposite extreme drove me nuts. The socialist approach left everyone with nothing and no one with anything. The graduating class was divided in 4 groups. Each group had a different category of jobs. There was yiddish yearbook, english yearbook, something to do with the graduation performance, and the last group were the g.o. and activity heads of other projects throughout the year.

No one was more than anyone else. The positions were equal. Yet there were still discrepencies because each year/grade/class there were different jobs that were coveted. A specific class that hated learning clamored to be on the graduation production because it meant leaving class for an hour twice a week for several months. Yippeee. In a different class being head of this or that was considered prestigious. Similarly, being on yiddish or English yearbook staff fluctuated in percieved honor depending on how much a specific class liked yiddish or english classes or teachers.

I looked at it as a travesty. There was no more chief editor, no more valedictorian in a real sense, no acknowledging girls for their writing talent, academic achievements, artistic talent, or anything else that girls need recognition for to build their identity. One common excuse I heard was that their talent was enough recognition they don't need more attention on top of that. Another loss was the artifical equalization which (never worked 100% anyway and) serves to cripple kids. They leave school expecting to face "fairness" forever.

Ha. Life isn't fair, and yes, schools need to use seichel when giving out jobs so that everyone gets to develop their talent, but it's okay to recognize talent when it does exist.
This is much more of an issue than the one in the story, IME.
Back to top

amother
Turquoise


 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 10:05 pm
amother wrote:
Didn't read the article but I'd like to add my two cents , for what it's worth.

As a student in a fairly large high school, I was "recycled" many times. I was head of various shabbosim, yb editor, part of important committees etc. I was s bright, hard working student but no family yichus, money or connections. There was one person involved in the decision making that knew, unlike anyone else, that I had a difficult home situation ( abusive family Etc) and aside for my bring "qualified " for the job, it was important for me to be kept busy out of the house as much as possible.
I will tell you that this was my saving grace. I would've long ago had a nervous breakdown and become a broken person . Being involved in productive activities that used my talents and strengths built me up and allowed me to become a confident independent person instead of a quivering shell.

Today I am a hs teacher, teaching for quite a few years. Although I am not involved in giving out jobs, I do hear a lot of the backstory to many decisions. While it is not always done fairly or correctly and the system leaves much to be desired, many times there are factors that go into this process that is not clear to the casual observer... Today we have girls that. Need to be kept out of their homes, off the street, away from negative influences or people...
Trust me, in a heartbeat, I would've given up every one of those coveted jobs for a loving home to come home to each night.


While I am very happy for you and that it helped you, what about the other kids who had difficult home lives but didn't have anyone "pushing" for them? In my case, I was BH smart, doing well in my classes (but there were those who shined brighter than I in grades. I was not the top student in any class). I had issues at home as well and could have used the extra curricular activity---especially a place to shine. But no one knew about it. They all assumed since I didn't cause trouble, followed all the rules and did pretty well in my classes that I was ok and "didn't need it". I was overlooked, plain and simple. I was not given a job until 12th grade when I was given the nerdiest job ever- no prestige and it was thankless (about as thankless as collecting permission slips from the entire school)!
But in 11th, when almost everyone else got a job, I did not. Even when I was the most qualified in my class for that job... What happened? Think sewing heads who never touched a machine before or a specific organization that does special needs had its "own chessed head" who never volunteered for them but I did chessed for them every single year. (the girl who got it failed at it too...) Girls got multiple jobs each year too!!!
Those heads got the jobs because of their last name. Or got them because they were failing and "needed a way to shine". But what about me--- quiet, no "last name", no yichus, who did well in school but not amazingly. You never gave me a job so I couldn't prove myself for the next year. And I never got the opportunity to shine. I was actually told by a teacher after one round of jobs were given out that they gave them to girls who weren't doing well academically. But I did "too well". Ummmm, but what about Girl A, B and C who all had either the same or better grades than I did??? They got jobs. But none left for plain jane me.
Back to top

amother
Aqua


 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 10:47 pm
amother wrote:
While I am very happy for you and that it helped you, what about the other kids who had difficult home lives but didn't have anyone "pushing" for them? In my case, I was BH smart, doing well in my classes (but there were those who shined brighter than I in grades. I was not the top student in any class). I had issues at home as well and could have used the extra curricular activity---especially a place to shine. But no one knew about it. They all assumed since I didn't cause trouble, followed all the rules and did pretty well in my classes that I was ok and "didn't need it". I was overlooked, plain and simple. I was not given a job until 12th grade when I was given the nerdiest job ever- no prestige and it was thankless (about as thankless as collecting permission slips from the entire school)!
But in 11th, when almost everyone else got a job, I did not. Even when I was the most qualified in my class for that job... What happened? Think sewing heads who never touched a machine before or a specific organization that does special needs had its "own chessed head" who never volunteered for them but I did chessed for them every single year. (the girl who got it failed at it too...) Girls got multiple jobs each year too!!!
Those heads got the jobs because of their last name. Or got them because they were failing and "needed a way to shine". But what about me--- quiet, no "last name", no yichus, who did well in school but not amazingly. You never gave me a job so I couldn't prove myself for the next year. And I never got the opportunity to shine. I was actually told by a teacher after one round of jobs were given out that they gave them to girls who weren't doing well academically. But I did "too well". Ummmm, but what about Girl A, B and C who all had either the same or better grades than I did??? They got jobs. But none left for plain jane me.


You have a very valid concern. We do have too many girls like you that are t getting noticed because they seem to be "average " and "ok". It is a real problem and it seems like the article was targeting just that. I was only trying to present another side to the whole discussion , but really appreciative of the author of the article for bringing a real issue of concern to the forefront of the publics mind
Back to top

gp2.0




 
 
    
 

Post Wed, Dec 30 2015, 11:33 pm
What I found weird and annoying regarding school productions was that once you contributed in a specific role, you were pigeonholed there for the rest of high school.

For example if you tried out for choir during 9th grade, during subsequent years you would only be picked for choir. Same went for dance, acting etc.

Based on my bad experience with this (I was always stuck with choir) I encouraged my younger sister to try out for dance, because she loved it and dancing is more fun and varied. Guess what, in subsequent years she was always picked for dance and was eventually head of dance. She loved it. I was happy that at least my bad experience was worth something. Very Happy

But it's really dumb that the same girls are picked for the same roles again and again. By the end of high school, everyone should have had a turn to be part of every role in the production - and yes, that means that one year the darling actress who always gets a main part should do some scenery and lighting instead.
Back to top

debsey




 
 
    
 

Post Thu, Dec 31 2015, 1:16 am
I loved the story - and I see it really hit a nerve with a lot of people. I was at PTA this week, and while I was on line waiting for teachers, everyone was talking about that story. If it hits a nerve with so many of us, why hasn't the system changed at all? Any high school teachers on here that can shed some light?
Back to top

amother
Jade


 

Post Tue, Jan 12 2016, 3:09 pm
I was reading the letters to the editor this weekend, couldn't believe a high school principal actually berated them for publishing that article.

Coup of the masses indeed. You have been called to task and you try to intimidate them for saying what should have been said all these years?
Back to top

seeker




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 12 2016, 3:29 pm
Oh that letter was so supremely irritating!!!
Back to top

amother
Jade


 

Post Tue, Jan 12 2016, 3:50 pm
Im still thinking of a proper response to that. The audacity and haughtiness and to think our daughters are totally at their mercy.
Back to top

iluvy




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 12 2016, 4:26 pm
And they didn't even sign their name!
Back to top

PinkFridge




 
 
    
 

Post Tue, Jan 12 2016, 8:07 pm
iluvy wrote:
And they didn't even sign their name!


And if they would have signed their names people would have appreciated their message? Please note: I'm not a NY principal nor have I ever played on on TV. I need to read the letter again, I guess, becuase I don't remember it being that awful.
Back to top
Page 2 of 3 Previous  1  2  3  Next Recent Topics




Post new topic   Reply to topic    Forum -> Hobbies, Crafts, and Collections -> Reading Room

Related Topics Replies Last Post
How to avoid vaccinating my baby until school
by amother
213 Today at 1:41 am View last post
Some kids don’t thrive in a school setting 33 Yesterday at 10:54 pm View last post
S/o Top BY school for girl with HFASD
by amother
20 Yesterday at 6:38 pm View last post
Did anyone get accepted to girl’s high school?
by amother
9 Yesterday at 5:15 pm View last post
Daughter was waitlisted at NJ high schools, what to do?
by amother
17 Yesterday at 10:01 am View last post