Yeshiva week frustration

amother

Purple

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 12:18 am

So I have a job that requires me to be there. I can't just take a day or two off. Just because the schools are off, should all the daycares close too? I have a toddler so what the schools do doesn't matter to me right now as I don't work at a school! What are moms like me to do!? (Hopefully when DC is old enough for school my job will allow me to take off a few days as I wouldn't be the newbie there... I just started this job!)
My husband works more than full time. It's only for a few days so it's super hard to try to find someone. Plus most places are full.
Do they expect us to have full time housekeepers/ nannies?

seeker

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 1:19 am

Does anyone make a "vacation camp?" Around here very often when the schools are off and it's a random time (I.e. not legal holidays when parents may be off too) a lot of the younger teacher's assistants or local babysitters set up some kind of group.

If your husband works more than full time, isn't he entitled to any personal days?

Do you have a neighbor or friend with a kid the same age as yours who might be willing to take yours in as well?

amother

Purple

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 2:13 am

DC is too young for any camp. Plus I haven't heard of any in my area. Plus not long enough hours for my day based off of the "in between camp and school" camps I saw last summer.

I tried asking some teens/ working single teachers but so far none available. And my friends who work with similar age children are able to take off. Or have family available or a housekeeper or teen girls or something else. My DH can't take off. No personal days and he has to take off too much time just for yom tov...

Rutabaga

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 2:21 am

What are the other families who send to the daycare doing? Maybe they'll be willing to share their solution with you, especially if you offer to pay something.

Can you take one day off and arrange a round robin type of thing with a few families where you each watch all the kids for one day?

Can you beg your friends who are taking off to take your child for one day each? Maybe offer to babysit in exchange on a night your husband is home to watch your child.

amother

Purple

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 3:13 am

Rutabaga wrote:

I need weird hours. I just found out that my backup can't make it either. I am willing to pay... I just asked someone else but haven't heard back yet.
I don't know the other moms from the daycare. The moms don't really talk to each other. Just drop off child/pick up child, no time to socialize with other moms due to parking or other issues. Trying not to get too descriptive here to out my location/day care.

seeker

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 3:43 am

amother wrote:

Those are the ones to ask! If they're taking off to look after their own children, maybe they can take care of your kid as well. I'd be willing to do that for a friend, even more so for someone looking to pay because as much as I love kids I might need some extra motivation to have more of them on my day off. Same for their housekeeper or teen girls. I could see a teen girl stuck watching toddler sibling willing to take on another toddler and earn some money for the day.

And it might be a good idea to find some way to get to know your fellow daycare moms.

amother

Purple

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 3:53 am

Sorry for not being clear: The few working moms (non chinuch) have husbands in chinuch so they can watch or they can't take another toddler as since it's a vacation day, they are doing something as a family. My social circles aren't too large or really, most don't have kids my DC's age.
And no one really wants to start that early on a vacation day.

Do these schools expect everyone to be on a yeshiva schedule? That our DH (if not us) work for a school or based off school schedules (like a daycare)? Not giving up hope, just concerned.

seeker

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 4:01 am

Even friends who don't have kids the same age might be willing to do you a favor in a time of need. What kind of grouches do you hang out with anyway? This is sad. Don't you have any friends or acquaintances who are in need of extra income and would do it for that? And what kind of career are both you AND your husband in that neither of you can take a day off to care for your child? Maybe it's time to consider something more family-friendly? Because this is only going to get worse... when I had kids daycare age there was almost never a day off but when they hit school age it happens all the time.

seeker

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 4:05 am

If you can't take any time off can you bring your kid with you to work? I know it's a stretch but stranger things happen. Maybe the others will just deal with it as a better alternative to losing you.

What would happen if you had the flu? Would the ceiling cave in?

ra_mom

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 7:47 am

I agree with all of the above.
Also, if you have a friend who is willing to take your child for just a few hours, then tell your boss an urgent family matter came up and you will be coming in late.
If all else fails, call in sick. Sometimes we don't have much of a choice.

happy1234

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 8:29 am

Can you find someone that has a full time babysitter and pay for the week? My kids are off but I have a babysitter as me and husband both work full time so I'm always covered. If someone needed the help, my babysitter would do it.

amother

Purple

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 11:56 am

They aren't grouches per say but when I asked in the past, they:
Had plans for the day
It was pediatrician day for all the kids
Their babysitter refuses (even if I paid a "bonus" for the day).
Or they are older, don't have little kids at home, they don't "do babysitting", don't have space in the car for another car seat etc.

I just switched jobs, hence the issue. I am also just starting out in my career but as I get a better position/have Time under my belt I could take off. DH is also newish at the job and really can't take off.
My field can be family friendly once you put the time in. It's hard to explain.
Plus I had a backup- who is usually available with even just a few hours notice- but something just happened and she has to cancel.

amother

Purple

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 1:39 pm

I forgot the biggest kicker. One person won't let me know who she uses when she needs a babysitter because heaven forbid we each need one on the same night. She actually said that.
I explained that I am in a pinch now. I usually have a backup. Mine can't help me here (no, she wasn't "taken" by someone else. She happens to have major appointments that she said she will try to switch for next week but won't know until later). I just want a backup for my backup.
How can I find out who babysits if no one will share their info? If I don't have neighbors old enough/responsible/available, how else can I find this out?

nicole81

Sun, Jan 24 2016, 2:29 pm

If you're on facebook, post in as many groups as possible looking for someone, and make a desperate plea as your status update. Message everyone on your friend list or text everyone in your phonebook, asking if they know a sitter or even a cleaning lady who would be willing to babysit. Social networking has been really helpful to me in the past when needing babysitters.

I understand not being able to take off, btw, and it doesn't seem all that shocking to me. There are certain types of jobs and work situations that make days off impossible at times. And there's also a huge difference between calling out for a day in a pinch, and an entire week. But generally we know when the days off will be, so we arrange well in advance.